Want to quit Bible study (page 2)

Murray Smith

Hi Chris . . . I think confusedstudents problem is alluded to in her sign-in. I may be wrong but it appears she has been approached at a vulnerable time in her life and is now well along in the indoctrination process.

confusedstudent . . . the indoctrination you have been exposed to has the potential to create confusion . . . it is a process designed to control your mind . . . your thinking.

Confronting the indoctrination process can be good for your personal growth, and can help to undo the effects of the indoctrination you have been exposed to.

Re-read Black Sheeps first post and do the research . . . then confront your doubts and fears . . . and question their teachings meticulously . . . you will erase any doubts about their teachings and will soon be left alone.

nugget

I would keep it simple and direct. Do not let them in the house you want to keep this short. State that you have an appointment and will need to leave in the next few minutes.

Thank them for the time they have put into studying with you but say that you have taken time to look at all aspects of the religion and it isn't a committment you are prepared to make. You have a new job and you do not have the time or inclination to continue the study.

You appreciate that this may not be what they want to hear but you are sure that this is the right decision for you and your family. Wrap it up with thank you again for all your efforts but I must get going I'm sure I'll see you both around.

If they ask any questions state that you are happy with this decision but if you ever change your mind you know where to find them. Do not get drawn into debate and merely repeat this statement as many times as necessary.

You will loose their friendship but with a new job you have potential to make many new friends that will not be conditional.

ThomasCovenant

I want to quit my Bible study

I want to quit purchasing that second hand car

Car salesman, ''We have the car for you. Trust me when I tell you it has only done 20,000 miles and does 80mpg, and will never let you down.''

JW sister, ''We have the only true religion for you. Trust me when I tell you we are right.''

Car salesman, ''Don't bother to read any negative reviews by third party independent reviewers of this vehicle. They are all lies.''

JW sister, ''Don't bother to read anything negative about our organization. It is all lies by evil people blinded by Satan.''

Car salesman, ''Whatever you do, do not listen to anything the former owner of this lovely little motor may say about it. What does he know?''

JW sister, ''Whatever you do, do not listen to anything former Witnesses may say. What do they know?''

Confused Student, tell them you'd never buy a second hand vehicle without doing some basic research about the make and model and the retailer and likewise after doing similar research about JW's you have come to the conclusion that you no longer wish to 'buy' into it.

It'll be worth it in the long run.

Holey_Cheeses*King_of_the juice.

Keep it simple. You haven't made any committments. You aren't a jw and are slightly (only) rated better than an outsider at this stage.

Forget the books. Forget the questions. The longer you stay involved the deeper they will get their claws into you.

Tell them you no longer wish to have study. Simple. They may pester for a while, but once they realise you are sincere then those people you had considered good 'friends' will drop you quicker than a hot coal. And no friends is certainly a better option.

Or, you could opt for black sheep's sound advice and tell them to bugger off, leave, piss off, or whatever phrase you may fancy.

Cheeses. Helpful advice at little or no cost.

anewme

Confused student, you are not as confused as your avatar name says you are. You are getting some clear messages from your heart to back off on your studies and you should listen to these warnings. Tell them clearly you have enjoyed your studies but that due to new circumstances you are going to get really busy and be focusing on your job and marriage.

confusedstudent

To Chris,

My problem is I did come into studying at a very vulnerable point in my life.. I have no family of my own, was raised in the foster system mother on drugs etc....I met them when I was a newly wed living in a place where I knew nobody. My husband was deployed and I was pregnant with twins. I ended up miscarrying in my second trimester and my bible teacher was the woman who drove me to the emergency room, I had nobody else I could think of calling. My husband was in Iraq and I knew nobody at my new base. The Sisters I have studied with have become what I thought to be very good friends of mine. And I can say now in retrospect I relied too much on them emotionally. I am sure about what I have to do, I can not become a witness. I guess what I am really asking for is a way to get out of this gracefully and without hurting feelings. In the beginning though I truly did like what I was hearing and was believing it, it's only after learning their more "interesting" practices that I have realized this. So please don't judge me, I am in a tight place right now emotionally and was just looking for support and advice on how to procede with this. At one point I really did want to get baptized. Silly me.

teel

The sisters who have done my study have become very very good friends of mine and it makes me sad because I have a feeling once I tell them I am through with studying they wont want to be my friends anymore.

I am sorry if I appear blunt, but is this sort of conditional friendship one you really wish? I thought I had friends too... as soon as I stopped visiting the Kingdom Hall, they immediately evaporated (bar one, who was trying to "encourage" me for one more year to go back). The friends I have now, I know will be with me especially in a crucial point in my life, even if that point might not be to their liking.

cheerios

perfectly understandable confusedstudent. maybe you should just explain that you no longer believe it and that it is not open for discussion. if they really are your friends, they will be your friends throughout. most of us know that jw friendships are entirely conditional but that is not always the case. just be honest and stick to your guns. who knows? perhaps you might even cause some to liberate themselves.

just my 2 cents

confusedstudent

Thank you all for your replies and for the webpages. You all have given me a lot to think about. I know that I will probably lose the friendships I have made and I acknowledge this and am prepared for it. It doesn't make it hurt any less though. I loved both of these women with all my heart.

DagothUr

I wasted 4 years of my life because the family I studied with became "friends" with me. And now when they see me, they pretend I don't exist. JWs are uncapable of unconditioned love and friendship. As long as you eat at the Governing Body's tabe, they are your "friends". After that, no. In your case, I think you can refuse to be baptised without giving too many details. They will not shun you, because you are not a baptized JW. Just keep a nice and amiable attitude (but be firm) and those sisters will still visit you, only less often. BEWARE: playing at both ends is dangerous, the JWs can be stubborn, persuasive and they know how to use sentimental blackmail. If I could go back in time, I wish I had the courage to say "no" when I was asked if I want to study the Bible with them.

Want to quit Bible study

Share this