You will know them by their love.
Horrible conduct by congregation Elders at my cousin's funeral.............
by RULES & REGULATIONS 67 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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chickpea
they cannot see as there is a beam the size of a giant redwood in their eyes...
condolences to your cousin for the loss of his mom
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LovesDubs
Assholes. Ok...correct me if Im wrong but arent the Elders the ONLY ones who are ALLOWED to talked to the DFd and DAs? Wouldnt those circumstances be PRIME to embrace a long lost brother and make him feel like he was still loved and encourage him to return to the fold? Instead they take that somber opportunity to punish him MORE.
They should all be taken out behind the Kingdoom Hall and stoned!
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Mary
Dealing with the death of their mother was bad enough but the conduct of the congregation Elders made it worse. The disfellowshipped child had to:
* leave the house when his mother died because Witness relatives were coming over to the house to visit the family. * had to stay on the side of the funeral room at the wake by himself while the rest of the family sat in the front chairs. * Elders refused to greet him in the line. They walked right past him. *He was told not to attend the luncheon after the funeral. He left alone and went home because some members would not attend the lunch if he was there.Yes......aren't these jackasses the epitome of agape love? Something similar happened when my brother died years ago. My other brother was DA'd and at that time you were supposed to treat a DA'd person the same as a DF'd person, even though he had never been baptized. We had the visitation for two days and then the night before the funeral, we were all at mom and dad's trying not to lose our minds when the phone rang. It was one of the elders who was calling, not to express his condolenses, but to tell us that my other brother 'should not be talking to anyone at the funeral' since he was 'not in an approved standing.' The stinking coward of an elder wouldn't talk to any of us, but left the message with my B-I-L.
We were absolutely stunned and I will never forget the hurt look on my brothers' face. My oldest sister (a faithful JW) got on the phone to blast him and at the same time, I grabbed the car keys and drove over to the bastards' house. I hammered on the door and the scumbag came to the door with a look of defiance on his face. I absolutely blasted him using every foul word I knew-----yes, I swore my face off to this bastard and told him in no uncertain terms what a pig he was for doing something so low. I could tell he was furious that a lowly publisher would dare speak to him that way but he obviously could tell that I was angry enough to do just about anything at that point. The crushing blow of losing my brother in a car accident was bad enough, but for our family to be treated so shabbily by this scum-sucking pig just sent me over the edge and it was with great restraint that I didn't push him off the front step, I do not exagerate. To this day, I get angry whenever I think about what he did and I've never forgiven him.
It boggles the mind that these elders cannot see that their behaviour mirrors that of the Pharisees---not Jesus. They absolutely make me sick. When my parents die, we will be having the funeral at the funeral home, not the KH and I will be informing them all that anyone who cannot treat the family with respect need not bother showing up at all.
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VM44
Typical JW behavior.
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LovesDubs
God Mary.... I can FEEL the heat coming off you still over that! I dont think I WOULD have been able to restrain myself from pushing his ass off the porch. And he's thinking "Gosh...how can I spin this into a part on the District Assembly for myself? And have somebody from Bethel patting me on the back and telling me what a faithful and spiritual brother I am!" While you are WILD with grief they dont give a fuck how they hurt you.
If my husband dies before me...there will be NO JWs allowed there except his one sister and her family. NO others. I wont have it.
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FlyingHighNow
I recall years ago, when I was in a rare congregation where the elders were intelligent and kind, a brother whom we loved, his son died in a car accident and the disfellowshipped daughter came to the funeral. She sat and cried and many witnesses, including the elders comforted her. I asked Bob about it and he said that when a death of a close loved one occurs, comforting a DF'd relative is an appropriate thing to do. He was very kind. I wish all elders had been like the original Lawrenceville Georgia elders in the 80's.
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happy1975
What a terrible experience!! Unfortunately, not unlike what happened when my mother in law passed away over the summer. My husband and I are inactive and my mother (who is DF, but attended the funeral to support me and help with my two small children) was outright shunned by all at the funeral. She sent a lovely flower arrangement to the KH for the service and wanted my husband and I to have it at our home to enjoy after the funeral. After everyone left to go to the meal, I took the flower arrangement and I was stopped by an elder and his wife to ask me what I was doing - apprarently they felt that I should leave it there for the congregation to enjoy on Sunday at the meeting. I ignored them and kept walking.
Just disgusting.
Happy
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undercover
Condolences to the family...
While it may be painful to relate this experience, I'm glad to see it posted. The more of these stories that are made known, the more it will show people just how much of a cult the JWs really are.
When lurkers (either those curious about the religion or JWs who are questioning) continue to see these experiences of unacceptable behavior it will only reinforce the criticisms that ex members have been making known.
These kind of experiences always bring back bad memories for me. I was a JW who followed the shunning rules to the letter and shunned one of my former best friends at a funeral. He was DFd and his father died. I totally ignored him at the wake and the funeral. I walked right by him in the receiving line and wouldn't even look at him. I felt like shit aftewards and I couldn't figure out why it was that I did the right thing but felt so bad about it. I finally asked myself how Jesus would have acted (still believing in the legend of the Christ at the time), and realized that Jesus would not have shunned anyone grieving the loss of a parent. It was then that I decided that I would never shun anyone again based on the WTs rules.
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justhuman
FlyingHighNow, this was an exeption. Indeed in the past times we had elders that they were kind and more modest regarding shunning. It seems that in U.S JW's are more strict to follow WT''s guidelines for shunning.
This is not happening in my country. The good thing is that WT cult could not brake completely the family bonds of our Hellenic Cultrure. And I can give several examples:
My coussin is getting married, and her father in law,who left JW's years ago attended to the wedding reception and the Kindom Hall. In fact he was standing along with the parents and he was receiving the greatings of the guests...my coussin invided her sister to attend at the wedding reception, although she is disfellowshiped.
My close JW's friends still call me(and they know that I'm apostate) Also some of my close relatives still talked to me
A dear JW friend died and she had 2 friends that they came to funeral. They were disfellowshiped years back, but they give their condolesences to the mother, and they all cried.
My sister speaks to me like nothing happened, and so does a close friend of her
A family friend(elder) gave me a big hug just at the entrance of the kindom hall. He had a few years to see me because he lives in a foreign country( I went to pick up my mother)
An elder who walks in the street see me coming and he gave me hand shake and spend 15 talking with me
But there are those who are norrow minded, and they make me sick. Specially I have this reaction from elders who come from US and Canada. They are amazing assholes...
Sorry about your cousin, hope that this event will open the eyes of others