Worst Rules

by DoomVoyager 59 Replies latest jw experiences

  • blondie
    blondie

    From long ago: Cole Porter

    Cole Porter - I Get A Kick Out Of You Lyrics

    My story is much too sad to be told,
    but practically everything
    leaves me totally cold.
    The only exception i know is the case,
    when i'm out on a quiet spree,
    fighting vainly the old ennui
    and I suddenly turn and see,
    your fabulous face.

    I get no kick from Champagne.
    Mere alchohol doesn't thrill me at all,
    so tell me why should it be true
    that i get a kick
    out of you?

    Some get a kick from cocainei'm sure that if i took even one sniff
    that would bore me terrificly too
    yet i get a kick out of you

    i get a kick every time i see you standing there before me
    i get a kick though its clear to me you obviously don't
    adore me

    I get no kick in a plane
    Flying too high
    with some guy in the sky is my idea of nothing to do

    Yet i get a kick
    Out of you

  • thepackage
    thepackage

    I heard one Elder say "your vacations should revolve around field services"! He would make it a point to stress this to all the dubs all the time. if you went out of town and he found out he would go out of his way to ask you if you went out on service and meetings.

  • DoomVoyager
    DoomVoyager

    Well thepackage, maybe you missed the recent Washtowel in which the experience of a family in Australia was recounted, their dad only got 2 weeks off a year, and he decided that instead of relaxing he and his family would pile into the wagon, drive out to the outback, and witness to "seldom worked territories". His wife then reputedly gushed, "That was the best vacation ever! Let's do it every year!" Yeah, after reading that, my magazine had a large hole in the center due to the high-pressure fountain of vomit I spewed.

  • Babylon the Great Employee
    Babylon the Great Employee

    We had a rule about no scented stuff in our congregation too. Sister Sneezy would practically go into anaphylactic shock if she even thought someone was wearing perfume or used scented soap when they showered. Then one time the DO's Wife (Sister Smells Like a French Whore) went out in service with us in the same car. She remembered Sister Sneezy's allergy and apologized profusely. Sister Sneezy was all, oh, no big deal, I'll be fine, we'll just crack the window a little. Nevermind her perfume was so strong, it was making me choke.

    Oh, some of my favorite "no-no's"... yoga, watching sports, punk rock, romance novels (even the ones without sex) and my all-time favorite: wearing pants. What the crap is up with forbidding women from wearing pants? Well, I know the answer to my own question, it's blatant misogyny and a way to control women, not to mention being able to constantly scold them for wearing skirts that show a bit of knee. (Look, Brother Pervert, stop looking at my knees!)

  • WingCommander
    WingCommander

    Man, are you serious about that WT experience? There is no way that could be real. There is no way someone could consider field service to be a "vacation." I know people that would divorce if they didn't get a vacation AWAY from the WT for 2-3 weeks out of the year.

    If the sheeple can't see through that pile of crap, they truly are mindless zombies. That is hysterical and SAD, all at the same time. It really goes to show that NO ONE is allowed to take a break to breathe AT ALL, at any time during their JW lives. Complete control, all the time.

    I swear, it's getting worse as well. My late father would have pitched a fit if read such drivel. (and he was kind of die-hard when I was young)

    Wing Commander

  • Switch
    Switch

    LOL Wing. You said sheeple! Good one.

  • Switch
    Switch

    From public talk - It would be wrong to watch movies that promote good vs. evil. An example would be a well-known movie that has "the dark side" in it.

    Were the brothers just trying to be clever in not directly naming Star Wars or are they not supposed to? Hubby and I hated when they were specific and made decisions for us like that.

    Hubby says that one speaker said that we shouldn't read the papers or watch the news. He's kicking himself for not walking out that morning!!

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    Having a chaperone for dating. These are not high school kids--they are grown adults! And the rule against marrying someone that is too "new" in the cancer--taken from the Washtowel 11/1/1989. Which rule was often used to keep couples from marrying, while someone else got the partner out from under their feet because they decided to bend the rule while Brother Hounder was watching the targeted "brother" like a hawk.

  • oompa
    oompa

    I heard a very poorly educated elder start a talk with these words.....and the CO was in the hall....and I SWEAR I am not making this up....his rule was.....

    "You really don't need no college education to git a good job".........he said it....I stood straight up fast....and just went to the library....my sanctuary......oompa

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    No birthdays.

    No Thanksgiving.

    No class reunions.

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