DIASSOCIATED NO WHERE TO GO LOST AND BROKEN

DonaLeigh

It's so hard not to get into the long heartbreaking story of where I was and how it all happened. But, for the moment I will spare all the details. It's the saga of those who disassociate themselves and loose their family over it. I just DA myself and was just announced. My daughter who is 19 and just married in the JW religion will be lost to me. I have no words. It's devastating. I am trying to move on but the teaching linger in my mind and my heart longs for real christian love...but where, I don't know yet. It's pathetic how These MEN on thier man made DOCTRINES can destroy perfectly good family and feel no mercy compassion or shame for it. How will I ever get over this anger? How will I find a "Home" for spiritual growth? My life feels ruined. LOST...Okay that's more than I thought I would say...Save Me!

DLS

OUTLAW

Looks like you found your way here.............. Laughing Mutley ...OUTLAW

buckster

Hello and welcome! This situaqtion often goes down real fast and its hard to hang on. Your mind races through all your fears and it can really spin you. Slow down and take it one step at a time. You found a place where others have been through situations like yours so thats a good step.

Eyes Open

Very sorry to hear of your situation and natural feelings, DonaLeigh. Welcome to the forum, and all the best with coping. Post as much as you want to.

worf

Hello DonaLeigh,

Welcome to this board.

Everyone here will understand what you are going through and you will find help here. I myself was a third generation witness, and my family had 8 children. I have 2 brothers and 5 sisters. One brother and one sister were had already left the organization.

I was an elder for the entire decade of the 1990's. When I realized the watchtower is not what it claims to be, as you no doubt have also, it caused a split with the rest of my siblings. But eventually, my other brother left, and one of my other sisters and her husband left. The three sisters who are still "in" do not speak or communicate with any of us who are out. And of course,all those who I grew up with in the organization have nothing to do with me either. So, because of standing up for what is fully integrated honesty about the organization, I have lost family members as well as a whole community of those who I thought, were true friends. Though it was not easy, I knew and continue to know, that my stand was the absolute right thing to do.

Most if not all here on this board have had similar experiences. So feel welcome to communicate here what your feelings are. There are many here who will respond to assist you in what you are dealing with, and will do so even better than my words. Feel free to e-mail me through this board if you like.

Again. Welcome!

Worf

Hortensia

that is awful. A lot of the folks on this forum have gone through the same thing, they will understand and be able to help you. I'm so sorry for the pain you feel right now.

boyzone

Hi Donaleigh and welcome.

I so understand where you're at right now but don't despair. The pain and hurt is very real and many on here have been through what you're going through.

Your daughter is only acting as she's been trained to do and is under the extra influence of her new hubby so be patient. She needs you and she will realise that very soon.

What you feel right now is the deep injustice of man-made rules a well as the anger of scriptures being misapplied to you. Such anger is only natural, you have been conned out of your beliefs, your time and energy, your family. These are precious commodities, irreplacable. You have a RIGHT to be angry. Just channel that anger in a constructive way.

Join something, sports, work club, etc, Get a network of support around you. You've made a good start by coming here, now broaden this out to the real world and make real friends who will show you unconditional love and friendship. They are out there!!

I am trying to move on but the teaching linger in my mind and my heart longs for real christian love...but where, I don't know yet.

Remember Jesus words? He said "come to ME all you who are toiling and loaded down and I will refresh you" He said "I am the way, the truth and the life, NO-ONE comes to the father EXCEPT THROUGH ME". Peter said to Jesus "Who are we to go away to? YOU have the sayings of everlasting life"

Can you see where I'm going with this? I cannot emphasize this enough, you do not have to "belong" to a religious organization to be a christian! All you have to do is believe in Jesus Christ and go to him. Let Him lead you to like minded people who will help you. He KNOWS what you need. Go to him first.

If some of the teachings still bother you then I cannot recommend enough 2 books called Crisis of Conscience and In Search fo Christian Freedom by Raymond Franz. They will answer many of your questions.

If you worry about 1914 being correct then "The Gentile Times Reconsidered" By Carl Olaf Jonsson will put you straight.

And finally, even though you may feel a little disorientated right now, have confidence that you made 100% the right decision to leave. Congratulations!!

nameless_one

Hi, DonaLeigh. I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling right now. Many here have experienced this same heartbreak and will be able to help you work through it.

Welcome to the board, you're among friends here.

ataloa

Hi DonaLeigh and Welcome.

I'm sorry your wounds are so fresh. You have done a very courageous thing and are paying a heavy price with the loss of the association of your daughter. Believe it or not, the anger can be worked through in time. It has taken a long time for me but I've been able to make a lot of peace with it. (Some anger still leaks out when I read other people's stories of injustice though)

What you said is true. They have no mercy or compassion - no heart at all. I also long for christian love as described in the bible. So many of us were hoodwinked into believing that that was the place it would be found. I am new here too. And I've just decided to take my time. I don't need to have all the answers yet. But there will be plenty of help here when I really want to start asking some hard questions.

Your life is not ruined; it seems that way now. And they did take some of the best years of our lives. But sometimes losing everything makes us have the courage to do things we wouldn't otherwise ever have done, when there's nothing left to lose. I can truthfully say I've had the most love and the best time of my life these last several years I've been out. All that was missing was being lost spiritually, but since I found this board I'm starting to have hope for that again.

Please do share more of your story with us when you feel comfortable. We are going to be okay.

sass_my_frass

Hi and welcome. Hold on tight because it,s a hell of a ride briefly, and then things go quiet. Here's the only thing you can do that will help: find things you enjoy doing and do them. Do them until you're bored and then do something else. Do them even though you're in agony. Do them until you realise that you seem to be feeling better. Then keep doing them.

DIASSOCIATED NO WHERE TO GO LOST AND BROKEN

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