Most Awkward, Embarrassing, Comical things you Experienced as a Witness ?

by flipper 85 Replies latest jw friends

  • flipper
    flipper

    OKIE 46 - Wow ! It DOES sound like you are an exhibitionist ! LOL! Just joking ! Did you get a good look at the other brothers while in the men's restroom ? Oh ! That's right - you had a boyfriend, sorry. That is hilarious what happened to your kid laying out poopy all over dribbling out on the carpet ! I bet it wasn't funny to you at the time though ! LOL! I bet the neighbors got " spiritually enriched " watching your dress fall off leaving you in your slip ! LOL ! Don't feel bad , remember that scripture : " All things are naked and openly exposed to him with whom we have an accounting ! " LOL! And the peep show while giving your talk ? Hilarious ! I remember that happening to sisters before when I was a witness - and you'd always have one sister in the audience giving hand signals to the sister to pull her skirt down ! Funny ! Good experiences ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    Warm Sunday afternoon in the middle of the WT study. A sister starts waving her hands to get my attention. She is setting in the third row from the front next to my Grandmother, who has slumped over in what turned out to be one of her fainting spells. I get up and work my way into the isle and scoop grandma up in my arms and start to the back of the hall where there is a sofa in the womens room. I burst into the room and there is a young sister setting there nursing her baby. She pops the still squirting nipple from the baby's mouth and I lay grandma out and retreat while the sisters who followed me start applying wet paper towels etc. Both the nursing sister and I had a hard time making eye contact for a long time after that.

  • flipper
    flipper

    GREGOR - I can only imagine that was an awkward situation for you ! Carrying Grandma down the aisle , and squirtin' nipples to boot ! Hope you weren't traumatized too much ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • okie46
    okie46

    Mr. Flipper, I was pretty embarrassed at the time, I was very shy at that age and my boyfriend was mortified. That was one of the weird things about him, he always worried more about what other people thought than about what I thought or felt. Unfortunately, there were some brothers standing at the urinals, but I got out of there so fast I don't remember seeing anything. I think my boyfriend/future husband was more embarrassed that it was me, like I did it on purpose or something. I wish I could say that it was the only time I accidentally walked into men's room, but I had it happen a couple of years ago again at a hockey game, so guess I am just one of those dingy type people in La La land, or as I prefer to think of it Happy-Go-Lucky.

    As I have gotten older, I decided to hell with slips, a personal rebellion on my part, due in part to another assembly experience, when this sister came up to me and said "Do you know that you can see straight through your dress"?. Now my dress came nearly to my ankles and I was wearing a slip, and it pissed me off so bad that she was scrutinizing me so closely that she was looking to see if she could see through my dress and that she had the nerve to be so self righteous in the way she said it to me, that I decided right then and there that "As long as I live, I will never wear slips again". Now, I dressed so modest as a JW, that when I look at pictures of myself in my 20's and 30's, I looked dowdy and actually looked older than I do now. So I decided what is the big deal with people being able to see your legs through your dress or skirt?? Most people have legs and if you wear shorts, people see your legs, so big freaking deal, you saw my legs through my dress, whoopdy doo. Anyway, the poop incident with the kid was the worst though. Poor little guy, he is almost 30 now and still doesn't know about it!!

    Another embarrassing experience, once again, in the bathroom at the hall, was when this elder's wife kept sticking her nose in my personal business regarding my children (I was single Mom at that time), and I got so furious that I pushed her up against the door and wouldn't let her leave the bathroom, until I had my say. Come to think of it, that was the same night as the skirt incident and the talk, probably why I couldn't stop laughing, you know, a stress reliever. I am actually mortified that I was going to try and fight her in the bathroom. Could you just imagine, two red heads going at in the women's rest room at the hall and the cops being called. Good lord!! Looking back at all of this, I can see why I did not make a good witness.

  • RR
    RR

    And elder farting from the platform while giving a talk!

  • RR
    RR

    One comical moment I remember was attending the CA at the Stanley theater, There was a yound couple seated next to my wife and I, and they couldn't keep their hands off of each other, hand on knees, under skirt, during the break, they're seats were empty for the rest of the convention. I guess they went home and took care of business.

  • RR
    RR

    I recall one Sunday while the P.O. was giving a talk, there was a baby crying, and he stopped in the middle of his talk and yelled "shut that baby up!"

    RR

  • flipper
    flipper

    OKIE 46- Yeah, that boyfriend sounded pretty controlling you had. Like you would go into a men's restroom on purpose ? Jeez. I think the witnesses dress codes have always been too strict. It's appalling that sister looking through your dress was so judgmental towards you. I'm glad you asserted your individuality; and especially towards the elder's wife ! They were always too nosy anyway. She deserved it.

    RR- An elder farting giving a talk ? LOL! Teenagers feeling each other out at a meeting ? Wow ! That elder was rude yelling at the parents to , " shut that baby up ! " Of course - that was way too common as well, elders being rude

  • keyser soze
    keyser soze

    My grandmother, just as the meeting was getting ready to start, and it got really quiet, shouts out loud enough for everyone to hear: "I forgot my damn bible!"

  • flipper
    flipper

    KEYSER SOZE- That is hilarious ! " I forgot my damned Bible ! " I had an ex-wife ( a JW ) I was with 19 years who had a real saucy grandmother and I was constantly breaking up fights between my wife, and her grandmother ! On the phone, in person, and she would yell at elders IN the kingdom hall, and try to take brothers and sisters before the elders on every little slight or offense ! Gawd, it wore me out being married to her grandaughter ! One of the blessings divorce brings - you also get divorced from the crazy a$$ family as well ! LOL! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

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