My JW mother passed away

by desbah 44 Replies latest jw experiences

  • desbah
    desbah

    So much has happen over the pass years since I posted on this forum. Three years ago I posted my first topic about my mother, she passed away recently. It still hurts to lose a mother, someone who gave you birth and raised you the best she could. I don't have any regrets how she tried to give me some direction about God, in fact I admired my mother for being a religious woman. It doesn't mean I have to agree with her religion. Taking care of my elderly mother over the years, I became the parent and she became the helpless child. This has humble me and now I know what to expect when I grow old. Her last days on earth were not spend in a hospital but with family who loved her, my sisters and I watched her as she passed away like a fading flower. I will never forget her sense of humor and the way she finally made peace with God.

    What I found odd was that the JW's hardly ever came over to visit my mother. Some of JW members who knew that I was taking care of my elderly mother would avoid me when they saw me. The irony was that the Mormons offered to clean my yard and wash dishes, and other Christians offered to come over to sit and watch my mother.

    The last time my mother went to the Kingdom Hall was last year for Memorial. My JW sister took our mother and she was so depress for weeks. I found out my mother thought she was not good enough to be part of the JW's, to me the JW's discarded her as non-active member and to make it worse my mother quit contributing money to this religion.

    Later when it came to my mother's funeral and burial. Two of my JW sisters refused to attend my mothers' funeral and burial. They made a big argument about this in a family meeting and got all the non-JW relatives upset. So they made other arrangements with the JW's to have a memorial done at the Kingdom Hall. Since most of my mom's relatives are not JW's, they couldn't understand why my JW sisters acted like that. They only said that JW sisters will regret not going to their mothers' funeral later on in their lives. The non-JW relatives we planned and arranged my mothers' funeral the way where everyone can pay their respects. Like what they say funerals are for the living not the dead.

  • AWAKE&WATCHING
    AWAKE&WATCHING

    (((((((((((((((((desbah)))))))))))))))))

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    hi Desbah,

    i am so sorry.

    your non jw family is right. they will regret it should they wake up one day to realize they let religious politics abolish the love and respect of family.

  • Layla33
    Layla33

    I am so sorry to hear this. My heart goes out to you. I had joined this forum about two years and a half ago, but it was only after a close family member of my that is a JW passed that it really pushed me here. The sadness was almost unbearable, so I can just imagine. Be strong in your time. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  • MissingLink
    MissingLink

    (((Desbah)))

    So sorry for your loss, and the extra family frustration just when you least needed it. What is wrong with people? Its times like these that people should just step back and try to be comforting without making issues of everything.

  • Dagney
    Dagney

    (((desbah)))

    My most sincere condolences to you; I am so sorry for your loss.

    Two of my JW sisters refused to attend my mothers' funeral and burial. They made a big argument about this in a family meeting and got all the non-JW relatives upset. So they made other arrangements with the JW's to have a memorial done at the Kingdom Hall. Since most of my mom's relatives are not JW's, they couldn't understand why my JW sisters acted like that. They only said that JW sisters will regret not going to their mothers' funeral later on in their lives. The non-JW relatives we planned and arranged my mothers' funeral the way where everyone can pay their respects. Like what they say funerals are for the living not the dead.

    I had a similar situation in my family last year that resulted in an absolute meltdown on the JW side, with non JW family looking at them with their jaws dropped open. I will never forget how the JW's acted even though I've moved on from the pain. I honestly think it continues to bother them to this day that they did not attend the service of their "beloved" one, for absolutely no reason.

    You handled things really well given the circumstances. I am happy your mother made peace with her God. The mother/daughter relationship is very complicated and I applaud your caretaking in her final days.

    Again, I am sorry for your loss, and wish you comfort during this sad time.

  • Casper
    Casper

    So sorry for your loss. It's really sad that people have to be so cold at such a painful time.

    (((Hugs)))

    Cas

  • chickpea
  • momzcrazy
  • DJK
    DJK

    Sorry for your loss.

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