Torn between being Gay and the Truth.........

by ScoobySnax 98 Replies latest jw friends

  • BFD
  • ScoobySnax

    But I can't just switch my brain off. I hear what you are all saying, and most of you stand from an outsiders point of view about the truth. I know you don't think it is that anymore, the Truth I mean. And that is what makes it so easy to give advice, not that I don't appreciate it. But it's very difficult when you are where I am now.

  • PrimateDave

    If you still love Jehovah, here is some light reading for you:

    Is It God's Word?

    Biblical Nonsense

    If you want to really understand the origin of the Bible, you should read:

    Who Wrote the Bible?

    If you still think it's the "Truth":

    Crisis of Conscience

    Then again, lots of people stay in the org. for various reasons that have nothing to do with belief, such as keeping family and business ties. In such a situation, one has to weigh the benefits with the costs. In your case, staying with the org. is costing you peace of mind due to lack of sexual fulfillment. What is it gaining you in return?


  • Casper

    you are right Scoobysnax,

    Most of us are looking at your situation from an outsider point of view. I have never lived with the choices you are facing. I do realize how stressful it must be.

    As for flipping a switch and turning off the "What -IF- it is the truth" thoughts, I think some of us do deal with that. I know I do. If, and I mean "IF" it is the truth... then I am toast and so are my children. That also is hard to deal with on a daily basis. So, on some level I can relate to what you are saying.

    I literally felt spiritually dead the last few years as a witness... something was wrong, and I don't feel it was 100 % me. So, I keep reading and searching, who know where I will end up.

    I wish we had the answers for you, I really do.



  • jgnat

    Snoobs, there's two things I've concluded about you over the years. First, you enjoy ambiguity. Second, you avoid pain at all costs. Ambiguity because though you hang with "apostates" on the board, you've never taken the next step to actually press the flesh with any of us. Whenever you swing towards the terrible truth about your beliefs, you swing back.

    Not that this is terribly unusual, many Witnesses go through the same anguish.

    Of course, you orientation makes your swings doubly poignant.

    And the second point. To finally make a decision would be too painful for you.

    I'm sure we'll see you ten years hence, still agonizing over the decision. Ah well. That's the way you are I guess.

  • Midget-Sasquatch

    I second PrimateDave's suggestion to read Franz's Crisis of Conscience. While I never really did believe it was "the Truth", for the longest time I believed the WTS leadership was sincere.

    But the evidence argues against that. The WTS has faltered in so many ways from intellectual dishonesty in their publications to sickening double standards for jws in Mexico vs Malawi.

    The "Organization" doesn't strike me as being spirit-directed but self-serving to the callous detriment of many jws.Your orientation doesn't factor in one iota to your morality. You can be just as loyal, ethical and humane as anyone else (and probably more so than the typical WTS higher up). By their fruits you'll know.

  • ScoobySnax

    jgnat.... So close. so close.

  • ScoobySnax

    and I thank you for saying what you said.

  • real one
    real one

    scooby, the jw do not have the truth about everything...but the part about being a homosexual is not acceptable to God is true. Our Bibles tell us this is an unacceptable practice as well as lying,stealing,or any other sin you can commit. The jw dont believe you can be saved because you have an earthly hope to live on earth but that is not true.

    You can go to heaven also if you ask God in the name of Jesus to forgive you for your sins. Jesus came to earth to give us all the chance to live eternally with Him. Thats why He died on the cross. Read the book of Romans and start at 10:8. Then read the entire book of Romans...the Bible was written for all of us not just a selected "few" at some parts, yes all of us.

    If you dont ask God to forgive you for your sins, you will be doomed. A lot of people are going to perish because of the jw cult and the many other cults going around out here. Oprah winfrey is getting ready to start another one.

    Once you are saved you can ask God for His Holy Spirit to lead you, and He will do that. This is also written in the Bible but few people really read the Bible. I strongly urge you to read your Bible,preferably get a king james version because the nwt is written for the cult members of the jw. it is their version of the Bible...everyone elses Bible tells us to worship Jesus but not the nwt. and Jesus is not Michael the arch angel.

    I ask you to do these things so that you may get peace of mind. these concepts may be new to you but try them and see if they are not true.

    here are some scriptures for you to look up in addition to reading the book of Romans: matt:3 1-12, 5:3, 5:20, 6:19-21, 7:7-8, 7:15-23, 10:32-33, 11:25-30, 16:13-20, 24:23-28 24:45-51 this scripture is for all saved christians which can be any of us who have preyed the sinners prayer

    here is the sinners prayer: you will be saved if you honestly say this,

    Dear Heavenly Father please forgive me for my sins. I believe that Jesus is Lord and that He died and God raised Him back to life. I ask you Jesus to come into my heart and guide me with the Holy Spirit.

    God will accept you and save you, if you truly believe this and tell it to others. Romans 10:8-10

    This may be a lot for you to chew on now but take your time and ingest it. I dont know how old you are but if you are of age to find a good Bible believing church then you are on your way to conquer this demon you are feeling inside. If you are not of age I will be happy to help you.

    Please pm me if you have any questions.

    anyone else on the board is welcome to do the same...i look foward to hearing from you as always

  • ScoobySnax

    There is no "terrible truth" about my beliefs, or those that even you once may have held. It is just as it is. I look all the time, I really search with my heart in all things. Everything I am, is always what I was, growing up and listening and trying to do "what was right" always. I know I have been here a long time, and sometimes spouting absolute crap. But I know that I still have this "something" in me, and it's confusing. I don't want to argue anymore. I just want to know if anyone understands and feels as I do.

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