worst week in my life

by Hortensia 52 Replies latest jw friends

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    last Monday my husband, a nice guy, after ranting for a bit about terrorists, came over to me, to kiss me I thought. He hit my head and then started to choke me, shouting "be healed." I managed to get away from him and he kept yelling "be healed" and saying that I was bewitched and had put a curse on him. Then in a normal tone he handed me the phone and suggested I call a friend. I called the police, who thought we were having an argument. I was so terrified I just grabbed some things and left, went to stay at a hotel. I went back with a police officer the next day to get my meds and some clothes. He acted pretty weird, but the officer didn't see any reason for a 5150. On Wednesday I convinced a friend of my husband to go back with me and a police officer to check on my husband. They made me stay in the car outside while they went in the house. I heard a gunshot and didn't know if my husband or the officer was killed. Turns out my husband attacked the police officer with a knife. They shot him, tazered him twice, and finally about five officers wrestled him to the ground. I couldn't see any of it, except the original police officer backing out to the street with his gun drawn.

    I was taken to the police station with our friend, who fortunately is a former NYPD cop, and he was able to help me quite a bit. I think the police were friendlier to me because I was there with a former cop for a friend. Also, he was the only actual witness to what happened, and since every time the police shoot someone they really go through a lot scrutiny, they are glad that the only witness is a former cop. We were there at the police station for 8 hours, sitting in a conference room, while they tore my house apart, searching it. They found more guns than I knew my husband had - some serious weapons. I feel I had a lucky escape, he could have easily killed me being so much taller and stronger than I am.

    so, anyway, I don't know where he is, or what is happening to him. I understand that what happens depends on the doctors - if they think he is crazy, then he goes to the state mental hospital, if they think he was on drugs, then it is a criminal case and he will go to trial and to jail. either way, I think I will never see him again, and anyway if I did see him again I would be so afraid I wouldn't be able to turn my back to him. I am in so much pain I don't know what to do. My friends are very kind, but at night I am all alone. I don't want people to say nice platitudes to me - it is an awful situation, the worst in my life, and I feel like dying.

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie

    You've been to hell in a hand basket this week, Hortensia! HOLEY MOLEY! Change the locks and get a BIG dog, just in case there's a slip up in the justice system, chere!!! Thank goodness he backed off from choking you!

    And think about getting some counseling. It'd be a good idea, just so you can get help sorting through everything that's happened and is going to happen.

    You may be called as a witness at his hearing. Don't know. I'm sure the DA will want to talk to you, though. Maybe just take your statement.

    Hugs 'n smoochies!

    Frannie (of the "glad you're still with us" class)

  • asleif_dufansdottir
    asleif_dufansdottir

    My God, Honey...I can't think of anything to say. I'm literally sitting here speechless. How awful. Please keep us posted. We do care.

  • What-A-Coincidence
    What-A-Coincidence
    what happens depends on the doctors

    Give them input though!!! U need to keep tabs on his whereabouts. Many times the Dr's evals are not correct.

    I have dealt with mental illness. I can be of assitance. PM if u need too. I am in California.

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    ((((((((((((((((((((Hortensia))))))))))))))))))))

  • bernadette
    bernadette

    that's horrendous Hortensia, I had no idea that you were in such an awful situation. Wish I lived nearer to give you some support

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    well, yeah, I got the locks rekeyed, as his keys are gone - the cops took his guns, cell phone, all the computers they could find (thank goodness I had taken my laptop with me), plus all sorts of other stuff including a piece of blood soaked carpet as evidence of who knows what - that they shot him? I don't have his car keys, or house key, or anything like that, keep looking for things and not finding them because the police took them. I can't be mad at the police, I was so frightened when I thought my dear husband was going to kill me, the officer must have been just as frightened to have a 6'3" madman trying to kill him; it's amazing the officer only shot him in the thigh instead of killing him. The police and my former cop friend keep talking about "suicide by cop" and saying he was lucky. I sometimes feel he might be better off dead as his future is grim - mental hospital or prison. And he isn't young - 62 next week. His life is ruined - I am so sorry for him but people keep telling me I have to think about myself. I can't.

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    Let me give you a hug Hortensia. Your world has been turned upside down. You will survive and move on. Everybody is here for you in any way we can be. Maybe this is a platitude, but its all I can come up with and it is sincere.

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie
    I sometimes feel he might be better off dead as his future is grim - mental hospital or prison. And he isn't young - 62 next week. His life is ruined - I am so sorry for him but people keep telling me I have to think about myself. I can't.

    Hortensia, did he just suddenly begin acting this way or has he had other episodes? You really need to contact the docs in charge of his case because they need to know all the particulars that no one else can tell them, least of all him.

    I know it's difficult to think of yourself at this time. But stop and consider this for a minute. Is there absolutely anything you can do to change his situation and remedy it in any way at this time? Probably not, other than seeing that he has any items they allow him to have that you can bring to him.

    Soooooo, in thinking about yourself, you might consider what you're going to do now.....like work...would that change? Are your needs going to change? All sorts of thoughts about your future need attention. The future won't wait for you to get around to thinking about it. It comes on like gangbusters at times.

    Hugs,

    Frannie

  • nvrgnbk
    nvrgnbk

    So very sorry hortensia.

    I'll send positive thoughts and love and concern your way.

    Nvr

    P.S.- Ending it all is no solution. Things can and will get better. If you check-out before it's time you're going to kill a little part of all of us. Everything is going to be alright.

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