A question for the men on this forum.

by restrangled 57 Replies latest jw friends

  • bigmouth

    What should I do for the women I care about who seem to constantly get involved with abusive men and wont leave them? If you 'take them out' you're in the gun for interfering with their relationships. It's very confusing to me.
    What should I do?

  • J-ex-W

    I know exactly of the kind of dynamic you are talking about. I am a sister, and I can't speak for most of the JW men, but I can tell you how the men who, I thought, have should have defended me responded instead. THEY DIDN'T! Right now it's very late, and I'm really tired (it just hit me), so I will respond in more detail to this subject tomorrow. Good night.

  • Mystla

    Bigmouth... I know that I usually don't want to be "interfered with" unless I ask for it.. but it is nice to know help is available. Let a woman know you are there if she needs you, and if you see a situation that you are not absolutly sure about.. ask! My brother and Father both volunteered to take my Ex "for a walk in the woods" and, while I turned them down, it was very nice to know they were there to back me up no matter what.

    My husband (not my ex, the current one) would support me no matter what.. even when I'm wrong and making a fool of myself he will back me all the way.. in public, he might let me know later what he really thought I told a guy off in a bar once, for no other reason than he was loud and such a pig I couldn't stand it.. he hadn't said a word to me, but on our way out I stopped and told him he was a blowhard who could go to hell.. my husband (his nickname is Ogre for a good reason) stood menacingly behind me during my tirade and we all walked out with out any violence.. he told me later he was proud of me for speaking my mind but glad he didn't have to "step in" My MIL was with us and she got a huge kick out of the whole thing and was greatly impressed with me.

    I love that I have some male backing for when I can't keep my mouth shut.


  • jayhawk1

    Of course I would stand up for my womenfolk.

  • Zico


    Since this is clearly directed at me, well, I know the guy very well, and I know, with absolute certainty, that he would never actually touch her. He even sent me an apology through e-mail about 30 minutes ago. Seems he woke up feeling guilty about it. I've defended her before, in the face of a real threat, and that was when I believed it was the Truth. I'm not a coward. sixofnine got it right.
  • OnTheWayOut

    I will defend all of my family members when they are faced with evil intent. If I read the thread correct, I will answer.

    I would allow myself to be df'ed before I let the brothers run over my wife or my mother. If they came after my family, I would
    put their welfare above my own. I know that I would do this, it is not just an answer to your thread, it is my life.

    But, of course, as mentioned- the brothers can only use hyperbole or empty threats.
    There may be husbands, brothers out there who would ignore such threats.
    That's not wrong either. There would be some logic in allowing the WTS goons
    to reveal their true personality to aid the women.

  • Jeffro
    I've read so many posts from the men on this forum. How many of you are are willing to defy the society, and defend your wives, sister, and/or daughters in the face of this religion?

    Whilst there are issues regarding the roles of women in the religion, this is not one of them. Any person should be supportive of their spouse/parents/children. Not everything has to become a gender issue.

    Just a question not a threat.

    The question might imply a challenge, but there were certainly no indication of a threat.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    I must admit a minor amount of remaining confusion in this - might just be too early in the morning for me - sorry.

    But - that said - I would defend my wife, my daughter, or my grandchildren to whatever extent was required. To the death. There are times that diplomacy might be the wisest way to defend them - there are many sorts of threats and many sorts of defenses - I say this due to confusion as to the particulars. But yes - I would defend them. Or for that matter anyone that I percieved to be in danger.


  • TheListener

    Why oh why do I feel the need to respond. I'll never know.

    I do and will continue to defend the women in my life. I would lay my life down willingly for my family - regardless of their sex.

    That being said, my wife believes that if she commits certain sins she is likely to die at armageddon. If someone from her religion reminds her of this I don't personally view it as a threat.

    In fact I am hopeful that having ones in the congregation act like asses and saying things like this will help wake her up to their 'love'.

  • LittleToe

    I find the way the question is posed offensive and borderline misogynist. My first inner reaction was "p*ss off". That was exacerbated when reading:

    again, not making judgements, just want to see the men step up.

    ...because the bottom line is that you are making judgements, but are couching it in language that you think we're stupid enough not to see through. We are not puppets to jerk around to your whim.

    That having been said I stand up for mine, which is a no-brainer, as evidenced from the following thread: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/15/65125/1.ashx I offer that merely to strengthen my argument in that your ire is evidently not directed at me.

    Whether or not someone else does, due to circumstances that only they know best, is their own business. To batter them around the head with some kind of communal poll is neither kind nor fair.

    So, if you're a nosey so-and-so who really just has to know what people will do in a given situation and to "call out" those who don't act the way you would like them to, then feel free to knock yourself out. It doesn't mean you're going to earn much respect, though.

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