Limits on paper towel, tp usage at DA's. What next? Have fun w/suggestions

by juni 63 Replies latest jw friends

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    I could see them making a anouncement in the KM:

    In order to keep keep our conventions profitable the WT society has come up with these suggestion for your enjoyment and cleanliness.

    All brothers and sisiters will be required to bring a small wash towel and soap These towels really do an excellent job in wiping our private parts. The saving that will be passed on to the WT Society will enable us to buy more printing presses in countries where our brothers are poor.

    Hygenically these towels do a better job anyway because they really clean those hard to reach spots. Bothers, not to mention that when we add the softening power of a wet rag, even those spots that toliet paper often leave behind, easily come loose. We feel Jehovah's backing in this new proceedure, and feel that many fine experiences will occur both inside and outside of Jehoavh's organization, as Jehovah's people get to be known world wide for thier cleanliness in these new proceedures.

    This is a very timely update and so please DO NOT FORGET! As no TP will be avavilible at conventions any more(If you forget you will be "shit out of luck" as they say)(Or You could just borrow your brothers).

  • MinisterAmos
    MinisterAmos

    I "missed" this year's DC, but it would have been a great idea to clog up one of the johns and start a flood just so the bros could have the extra privilege.

  • troucul
    troucul

    Ok...it's done. My first task is to go to a DA and do everything in my power to violate their POS SOP's. Who's up? I'm thinking Portland, ME, summer 2007. Who's with me? If that's too far north, we could do a CA in Natick, MA. Think about it! We'll get together at the Hilton, Sheraton, what have you, tie one on, and then head to the assembly. If you don't think that would be a good time, you're an idiot. Why does the idea of an M80 flushed down the toilet sound so appealing? Andrew

  • dustrabbit
    dustrabbit

    1. Don't let the DO or the CO near your kids unless they act up. Corporal punishment is hereby necessary.

    2. Make sure the fat lady sings.

    3. Don't allow the old folks to discuss the Generaton of 1914 passing away.

    4. Don't let your kids blog about the DA on myspace.com

    5. Announcement from your "loving" Brothers at Bethel: DA are not, I repeat, hook-up central for your teenage brats. Keep them by your side at all times. Immorality should not be present at a DA....

    6. PA annuncement: Michael Jackson has left the building....you can now let your kids, especially your boys, roam freely.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5
    Next thing you know they will stop supplying paper products completely. You will have to bring it with you!!

    That is a good idea. You can get mini tp rolls at Target.

    Josie

  • juni
    juni
    Why does the idea of an M80 flushed down the toilet sound so appealing?

    Heh troucul !!

    How have you been? Leave it to a former soldier to come up w/war games !! Love the idea of being shitfaced and going to an assembly. Can't you just hear all of the craziness and attendants running around w/their QUIET PLEASE; KEEP MOVING signs? They'd be in need of a lot of tp trying to get things back in order.

    Love it.

    Take of yourself.

    Juni

  • juni
    juni

    Purplesofa - That is really funny! It's good that she didn't flip out at you.

    Yep..they were on a mission from god and damn proud to do their part in ridding the world of toilet paper and paper towel abusers.

    Good evening my bosom friend Bronzefist. Faithful witnesses to the end even in small things. Their reward will be great for carrying out their assignment - these "abusers" must be faced head on or ass on?? FORWARD YE WITNESSES

    Too bad the organization doesn't concern itself with child abusers w/as much ardor.

    Hugs,

    Lady Juni

  • joe_black
    joe_black

    I believe they will finally officially suggest what everyones been doing all along, to start using the Watchtower and Awake mags as the official asswipe of the organization. The GB will be resolute in their decision(directed by holy spirit, of course)that all JW's must do their part to be conservative and help protect the "environment" in these last days of the last days, lol.

  • LDH
    LDH

    TROUC nice to see you.

    Want to go to Bakersfield CA with me? I will bring a laptop with a wireless internet connection so I can blog while we 'listen.' I can log right on the this site. Hopefully share the JR Brown interview with ones around me.

    I will also rip the paper off the mirrors in the restroom and bring in a catered lunch from El Pollo Loco and share it with the closest large Mexican family I can find, LOL

    It took a Sunday Public Talk where the speaker counseled™ the youths in attendance about how much math they should take in school for me to fully, finally realize that I was done with JWism
    Actually, you can stop after second grade. You don't have to be all that skilled to count to "1" for magazine placements and Bible Studies, LOL..
  • Scully
    Scully
    I "missed" this year's DC, but it would have been a great idea to clog up one of the johns and start a flood just so the bros could have the extra privilege.

    That would be simple enough to do. Just flush a new Publication™ down the toilet, wadded page after wadded page. They are, after all, just laden with bull$h!t.

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