Hey Doc you won't need to feel disgusted by the baby jesus butt plug - I'm sending you some special soap ..it'll have you all cleaned up in no time I sent some to my Brother Farkel a few years aga and he swears by it .
Forget Pope on a Rope - Try Wash Your Sins Away Soap!
Can't shift JW guilt? Want to get rid of iniquitous grime? Do other soaps promise much but fail to tackle that "unclean" feeling? Why not try new, improved, "Wash Away Your Sins" Soap?
While other soaps merely skim the surface, this biblical blend of Somalian frankincense and Persian nutmeg and ginger (in a 100 per cent vegetable oil base) lathers your soul and drives those troublesome sin blots down the plughole. Make "cleanliness is next to godliness" a reality: only $8.00 for seven ounces of creamy righteousness from the oldest soap makers in New England.
Also available: matching bubble bath. This baptism in a bottle is "CO tested and Bethel approved" – a snip at $12.00.