A long overdue statement

by truthsetsonefree 69 Replies latest jw experiences

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  truthsetsonefree

  Most of you have seen me post under my alias truthsetsonefree. Some call me "tsof" which is cool too. One or two of you know me by my real name. I am on the road a lot and I find it easier to browse JWD from a handheld. But it is impossible to post from there. (If someone knows a workaround please pm me.) But I follow this board diligently and really get a lot from it.

  I said when I began to post that one day I would write my story. I still plan to do that. But till I find the time to write it out, I thought it beneficial to something out about myself that may be useful in understanding me and in furthering the struggle against the WTS's oppresive and arrogant policies.

  I am an elder in good standing and have been for a number of years. I stay in part because of family, but also because I am firmly committed to changing the poilicies of this organization. I feel that people are needed on the inside to help with this. Those of you who know the projects that I have been involved in the past few months know that this is true. I am not at Bethel in case some are wondering that. I don't want to sound like I am more than I really am. But I intend to help in any way that I can. And I do have access to current correspondence and directives from the Society.

  Furthermore, I have opportunity to serve on and to chair many JCs. In some ways this is one of the paramount reasons why I remain an elder. Namely to show kindness and consideration to those who end up in this procedure. A committee swayed here, someone not df'd there, is just one more person/family that can be spared the unkind treatment often meted out when one is df'd.

  Further, I feel that good elders are needed who refuse to teach these unloving practices and to advocate for those who are still blinded by this religion. I endeavor in all of my parts, including CA parts, to focus on the Scriptures, mercy, kindness and on love. Any that deal with prophecy, the organization or blood I avoid. I refuse to teach something that is not Scriptural or violates my conscience. It is not a perfect way of resisting this organization, this I realize. But it is a way I am finding effective for the time being.
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  luna2

  I truly can't imagine how difficult it must be to have to maintain a good standing in the JWs, as an elder no less, while knowing that so much of what they teach and do is unscriptural. As long as you must continue on for the family, I think its great that you are trying to mitigate some of the possible damage in JCs and are focusing on the more positive of Bible teachings. Good for you!
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  insearchoftruth

  tsof,

  Best of luck to you, I have read a lot on the jwreform site and many of those articles are very interesting. My wife's family is jw and if the organization were not in place that is and the rules being set so firmly by the men, I do not think I would have as much animosity towards the faith. Each of us is entitled to their own religious beliefs, but one should never let their faith take over their life. We need to retain the right and will to think for ourselves.

  Keep striving for reform tsof, sounds like you are a great person and are at least striving for some change, however so difficult it may be.
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  greendawn

  That's very interesting and useful what you are doing to help while staying in as an elder. Are there any elders in the congo that object to being kind and merciful?
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  LittleToe

  Been there, done that, can totally empathise.

  It will eventually grind you down and you'll realise how much of your own life you have invested in pursuing an empty pipedream.

  Good luck, and meanwhile keep a close eye on your mental health. If you break you might get patched but you'll not get fixed!
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  jstalin

  TSOF:

  I've been in your position. I was at the top of an organization for much longer than I should have because I thought I could do better by changing it from the inside than the outside. I was wrong. It was a gigantic bureaucracy and essentially unchangable. Far more damage can be done to a bad organization from the outside where you can speak your mind and tell the truth. Faking it and hoping that, because of your position, you can change things, won't work. You'll end up with little to show for it and probably more than a few grey hairs. If you haven't read it, check out Ray Franz's Crisis of Conscience. He was at the top of the WT and his attempts at change only got him kicked out.

  I'm just relating my own experience from a similar situation. Large organizations have a way of not changing unless forced to do so. They need a crisis on their hands to begin the change process. And I don't mean a little crisis, I mean the organization's very survival. And most large organizations which come to that point do not survive.

  Think of the Watchtower as GM. GM has been in decline for 10 years or more and may go bankrupt in the next few years, and it is still having a very hard time changing. The WT is like GM 20 years ago. It has a long ways to go before it enters crisis mode.

  A friend of mine who was part of the board of directors of the same organization as me stayed on a little more time just to see some of the little things through, one person at a time. She felt that the overall organizational management was too far gone to change anything, but she did have it in her power to help a few people in individual situations. She decided that was her place, and I respect her for that. I see your situation as something like that.

  I don't want to sound like a downer, but you're not going to change the organization. About all you can hope to do, as you have said, is help those individual cases.
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  truthsetsonefree

  Greendawn:

  There are definitely fellow elders who feel that mercy and love should not come first. And I am in a fairly liberal congregation. I saw a fellow elder get removed because he was "too merciful" in some JCs. And it was the CO who went after him.

  LittleToe:

  Is that what my two therapists are for?

  jstalin:

  I've read both of Ray's books. They were what changed me. Its unfortunate but true, WTS won't change much. Maybe the constant legal pounding will help some. When I feel like I can do no more good or when my family is ready, I'll probably be gone.
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  Chimene

  What about the thread that was going yesterday about Bethel being done away with? And even more strange, (maybe not since I've been working full time since 15), I took yesterday off to pack because I'm moving. I drove by the KH and the parking lot was completely full at 10am. I thought on a Wednesday???? Then I came home and read the thread about Bethel, do you think they are all meeting out of panic? I hope....
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  unclebruce

  ...find it easier to browse JWD from a handheld. But it is impossible to post from there. (If someone knows a workaround please pm me.) But I follow this board diligently and really get a lot from it.

  G'day truthsetsonefree, It sounds like you need a blackberry or laptop centrino (for apostates on the go!

  Each of us is entitled to their own religious beliefs, but one should never let their faith take over their life. ; We need to retain the right and will to think for ourselves.

  Except JWs are not entitled to their own beliefs or right to think for themselves. They give up those rights when, immediately prior to baptism, they declare their loyalty to a table and twelve chairs in Brooklyn New York.

  unclebruce
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  James Free

  because I am firmly committed to changing the poilicies of this organization.

  ...pursuing an empty pipedream

  Sorry, but you are wasting your time. Eventually you will be forced to teach something you know to be wrong. You can't pick and choose all your talks.

  I am sure you are sincere, but I suspect the real reason you stay in is fear of the consequences. (And that's quite understandable)

  The other reason you give, whilst true, are likely to be secondary, self-comfort to justify your double life to yourself.

  Unfortunately, in time you will be caught out.

  I wish it were otherwise, but the Org. could not be steered away from its spiritual corruption by Ray Franz even when he was in the GB.

  It cannot be changed from within. It is built on sand.

  I don't know you, and I certainly do not want to be critical. You sound sincere and like you really want to help the 'brothers'. It's just that you need to realise it won't work in the end, and you are only postponing the inevitable.