by Mary 53 Replies latest jw friends
OK, if you had to choose between Looks and Personality, which wins? Guys: If a girl is only mediocre in the Looks Department but is absolutely fab-u-lous in the Personality Dept...........which is more important to you? Or are they equally important??
Girls: If a guy is mediocre in the Looks Dept. but is absolutely fab-u-lous in the Personality Dept. which wins out??
Does anyone besides me look for a certain amount of Spirituality (shit I can't spell tonight!) in a guy???? Or girl???
They gotta' be spirtual!!!
Sexual Intimacy and Fluff just don't cut it afterwhile!
I think both men and women are programmed to go for looks initially whether they like to admit it or not. Of course, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Sense of humour, every time, I love a smart intelligent wit. As for spirituality.. I like someone that thinks about things but is open minded enough to consider other peoples points of view. But hey, if all this comes rolled into a delicious looking package, who am I to turn it down
poppy x
If there is any girl from my past that I lament as the "one that got away" it would be a (non-JW) girl I dated a few years ago while I was still in da troof, kind-of.
She wasn't beautiful, and I've dated better looking women for sure. But she was fabulous. But I was a mess.
Someone who has depth to them. Someone not afraid to get into the nitty gritty of issues. Someone not afraid to let it all go and do something outrageous. Someone intelligent, someone who can appreciate the differences between people.
Personality has always won with me. In the past, I've been told I should raise my standards.
I'd be lying if I said looks don't matter, they do. But so does personality and sense of humor.
forgot to add--as for spirituality, I have no preference other than not losing sight of reality and being down to earth no matter what. And letting me be me.
Beauty and physical attractiveness, as Balistic says, is often the catalyst which starts the ball rolling with how we are attracted to each other. Once all the " I'm In Love, Again " feelings begin to disapate and we're left with having to get to know people for who they truly are, then is the only time when the true work will come, where we'll require a little more than the superficiality of physical attractivness to keep one interested. Spirituality, a good sense of humor and honesty to me become equally as important, if not more so.
It may sound corny but when I'm truly attracted, it's beyond the physical.
I was walking down the street one night and glanced across the road into a restaurant. There was a woman working hard in there and I was just..... Couldn't see her face clearly, how tall, body shape(she was behind a counter in the kitchen) as she was 40mtrs away!
I told my friend that was with me that I am going to ask her out!
He thought I was joking. I didn't stop to think
Walked across the road, introduced myself. Found out she was single and asked her out.
She was gobsmacked but said yes.
This has happened many times to me.
My husband and I were having a conversation along similar lines this morning. First I must say that I am no ravishing beauty (IMO) but I do have my moments. My husband tells me that he thinks I am beautiful (gotta love a good man). Well we were talking about how some men react to me or better to say how I get no reaction. Honestly I'm not looking for a reaction, I'm happily married, but I do like to watch the reactions I get from some men.
OK, here's the example: I just started working 3rd shift at Target, unloading trucks and stocking shelves. There are quite a few black guys who work there. Hardly any of them talk to me, maybe one or two in passing but to only say "how you doin?" I know why. I'm not dressed, or wearing makeup, nor is my hair smartly done. Last night another black lady who works the same shift, who always amazingly enough wears makeup and hair is done, received from one of the gentlemen the compliment of "she cute". I watched in amusement as she kinda laughed it off. I'm not jealous I just think it's funny.
When I was younger and going out to clubs, I used to wear short short dresses, fishnet stockings, and high heels. I had the guys dripping off me. One day I got tired of it, because the guys I was attraching were mostly only after one thing. So I tried an experiment, just to comfirm that I was right. I went to a club and instead of wearing a short short dress I wore a suit that hit me just above my knee. Not one guy asked me to dance.
I have another story: My husband (then boyfriend) had an errand to run and I tagged along. He met a couple of guys at a hair salon and introduced me to them. They were kinda nice in an offhanded way. I could tell that they werent impressed by me. I had no make-up on, hair was ok (nothing flashy), and I was very casual in jeans. So my husband mentions that we were going to a party of a mutual friend in San Francisco and the guys said they were going too.
We got dressed and went to the club. We saw the guys there. And guess what? Both of those guys did double takes when they say me. Can you say jaws hanging on the floor? I looked good and they knew it but it was too late. I knew how shallow they were and I knew what a good man I already had.
Josie ~ A Damn Good Looking Woman when She Wants to Be
