you ever have one of those things that happen to you that just leaves you speechless.
well the other day one of my best friends (someone i have known for years) told me that they might have cancer.
they have a tumor in their leg that just changed size as well as a small lump in their arm.
Hi Spice,
I am truly sorry to hear about your friend. I lost a very close friend to cancer last year. It was very sudden.
Here is a link from the Canadian Cancer Society on how to help someone who has been diagnosed with cancer. I am sure if you contact your local cancer society they would have information for you as well.
http://www.cancer.ca/ccs/internet/standard/0,2704,3172_369341__langId-en,00.html
Sounds like just by being with your friend you are helping.
Breal.
well, i can't say i didn't see this coming, but the reality has hit me.
my father has put me in a difficult position.
first of all, i need to give you guys some background on the situation.. back when i was 20 years old, i had a girlfriend.
Quality of life (not in a monetary sense but a happiness one) is very important . Perhaps you could look into sharing a place with a roommate or paying room and board somewhere else? Think of it as a dry run for things to come once you are married and need to support yourself and your wife. Or if you are able to stand it and it works best for you now financially and down the road with the wedding and the other things you have planned try to stick it out for another year. Good luck with whatever you decide.
Cheers,
BReal
i have been reading quite a few of these threads and post and through it i feel as though i have come to know some of you and your behaviors.. i notice that there are many of you who are still associated with the hall, and have not left yet... yet, bring up very "strong" points on the board.. i have a question for all of you who fit this description.... why dont you just 'effin leave already?
whats holding you back?
if you feel soooo strongly that this is "wrong" are you too chicken to state your opinion to a family member?
I can’t relate to this scenario as I was DF’d after leaving….but I think it may be similar to having a job that one gripes about all the time but sticks with for a variety of reasons…. (the grass is not always greener, family, friends, life in general, money etc) People tend to stick with what they know until they find the motivation or full reason or ability to change things. Sometimes circumstance prevents people from acting on certain decisions until a later date (ie: spouse, kids, school, work). The JW religion is simply this sort of scenario but on a much higher level. Being a JW affects every aspect of a JW’s life. I don’t believe that it is always that easy to pinpoint any ONE reason why someone stays, goes or slowly fades at there own pace. Deciding to leave may be an easy decision for some but for others it is more a journey and it can take time. Who are we to judge?
not meant to give anyone nightmares !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
i'm sure we will all answer no, but for the fun of it, what would have to happen for you to return to the kingdom hall,.
and what would the elders/judicial committee say to you if you wanted to go back.. do you think even if you returned with a new attitude, that you would always be "marked" by the congregation.. should get some interesting answers !!!!!!!!!
Already attempted a return before meeting my husband and it was a heart wrenching, humiliating experience. No desire to repeat it.
Not sure what the elders require of one trying to get reinstated.
I believe that it would be very difficult if not impossible to really have a “fresh start”.
Sometimes when I am back in Alberta I am tempted to take my husband and attend a meeting where it all began just to have a good laugh and give them all something to chat about for while….but it’s not worth it. As much of an education as it would be for him it’s simply not worth it. I wonder if they would try to convert him?
i am new to the board and have read countless gripes and pokes at "the organization" but i fail to find one interesting question.. in preface... i was disfellowshiped myself over 5 years ago.
in that time, i had done much searching, visited many churches and faithes.. going to some for as short as one session and some as long as 6 - 8 months.
after i felt my search was in vein i stopped attempting to go to these shurches all together.. i never forgot how to pray through.
I think being raised a JW gave me a very basic set of good morals to abide by. These same morals and values can be instilled in a person no matter the religious affiliation. I believe the JW’s take it one step over the line to a form of severe control and manipulation. Congrats on the changes you have made in your life and I am happy for you that you found being part of the JW’s an impetus for that. I believe that for each individual the willpower or motivation to change things in there life they deem to be negative varies.
Upon leaving I learned that one can be a good person without belonging to any religious organization. I discovered that I don’t always need to be striving to constantly prove myself worthy to other people.
Cheers,
BReal
ok.....check this out.. it's nothing new, but you have to admit, wouldn't it be nice if we could go somewheres way down south that we could call our own?.
well wonder no more.. check this out: http://www.aplaceinthesun.ca.
the possibilities, once again for the islands of the turks & caicos as part of canada, has resurfaced, but this time, it could happen.. before: most southerly island in canada .
That would be heavenly!
when i was df'd i had some relatives that i was not close to that were never jw's.
the remainder were jw's.
now i am married to someone whose only religious experience is sunday school.
I didn't notice the remainder of my post was missing before I signed off last night....
I was going to say that for me when I was first DF'd there were a number of good friends from school/work and there families that supported and encouraged me. And now since my husband and his family were never part of the religion they have filled some of the void.
What was it or who was it that encouraged you on your journey away from the JW's?
seems its been awhile since we had one of these questions go round so i figured with all the newbies lately we shuld get a new one going.
i get to do it cause well umm errr..... i've been here for over a year (and yes noone noticed *sniff* *sniff* but thats ok).
soooo without further ado on to the question at hand..... why do you post here?.
After a long time of not discussing my experience I found this forum where people are able to speak there mind and heart without having to explain all the little rules to others since they experienced something similar. I did not realize how much it still affected me.
Also I learn a lot from other posters. Sometimes I don't reply since so many people have already expressed my opinions but it makes me think about things I would not have had it not been for reading this forum.
just curious.
i get the impression from reading posts that a great deal are.
i also noticed while i was studying with them that virtually everybody has/had a relative that was disfellowshipped or knew someone who is/was.
DF'd. Still not sure what the actual reason was.
being raised a witness, my mother has asked me whether or not i held her responsible for her bringing me up in the way that she has.
i feel that my upbringing is something my mother can be proud about.
even though i do not believe in the "truth", i do feel that she did a good job of raising us.
I think they did the best they knew how to. However I also believe that since there are tests or courses for other things like work, getting a drivers license etc there should also be a mandatory one for people before they are allowed to have children.
