Got this off Mark Prindle's website. It's in REALLY bad taste...
Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett and Ed McMahon arrived at the Pearly Gates at the same time. St. Peter said, "Unfortunately there's only room for two of you in here, so each of you must tell me why you think you deserve to enter Heaven." Ed McMahon spoke first, "I've lived a good life and brought joy to many people through my appearances on The Tonight Show." Farrah Fawcett was next: "I was always a good person, kind to animals, and people loved masturbating to my poster." Finally, Michael Jackson spoke, "I replaced my entire head with a plastic stick." St. Peter thought for a moment and decided, "Okay, all three of you can come in." "What made you change your mind?" asked Farrah Fawcett. St. Peter chuckled and replied, "Well, I'd prefer to only admit you and Ed, but it looks like Michael's hand is already stuck inside the baby Jesus!"