Growing up as a JW has negatively affected my ability to live and think productively.
-silent
silent
JoinedPosts by silent
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19
Has growing up as a JW affected my ability to forgive ?
by troubled mind ini really don't understand the concept of forgiveness .
lately in my life several people have thrown that term around so easily ,and i am confused .
is it because we were taught to cut people off so easily as jws that i find it hard to forgive ?.
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I Was Asked To Perform A Marriage Ceremony But Don't Know I'm Qualified
by minimus inmy girlfriend's daughter and her fiancee asked me to marry them last night.
they live in connecticut and will be married in new york.
i felt honored that i was asked but i don't think i can do it because i am not a clergyman or minister and my u derstanding is that only clergy or judges and lawyers and justice of the peace can perform a wedding ceremony and marry a couple.. does anyone have any information on this subject?
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silent
@ idiotnomore: That's awesome! I wished I had thought of that because I had wanted a family member to give our marriage talk, but he wasn't qualified. If you can go to a Justice of the Peace and have it done, then if you come from a congregation of back biters or where everyone is against you (as I was and am), then how cool would it be to have your relative give the talk (of course not at a Hall because that wouldn't be allowed), and then have the J.P. come along and do the vows? That way you could have it done your way and take the power away from them and all their little stinkin' rules. I like this idea!
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What would you do?
by ctrwtf inso i travel alot for business and check into a hotel, start putting away my things and lo and behold in a bureau drawer, find a couple of wt's a couple of awake's and two tracts.
1. throw them in the trash and forget about it.
2. leave them where they lay and forget about it.. 3. leave a note for the housekeeper asking to lay off the cult recruitment.. 4. bring it to the attention of the management, and possibly get the housekeeper fired.. thanks for your input.
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silent
Are they new copies? You wanna hang on to the January 1989 WT for the preaching work being completed in the 20th century reference...
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Looking back to what happened since sept 2012... i must say its brilliant !
by insidetheKH inwho thought in the early months of 2012 that such a rebranding would take place in only a matter of 24 months?.
they managed to go from an antique looking and boring website (watchtower.org) with hardly any attractive content to go to a fresh looking new website with stuff for everyone, families, children, teenagers.. movies, and short videos about almost everything and new ones added every month.
cartoons, animation video's , interviews, picture activities all kind of projects, many audio files like dramatic bible readings, dramas and music, online research tools, new brochures for kids (off and online) etc.
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silent
After 20 to 30 years of being ostracized for having a computer and using internet, in the end it was all okay? Whatever happened to showing people scriptures right from the Bible? Isn't using a kindle or notebook the same as showing someone something you photocopied? I've put up with so much negativity from Witnesses over the years because I enjoyed computers and internet use and now all of a sudden it's okay? So many witnesses I knew would not buy a computer or get an internet subscription because the society warned about the perils of using it. In true black and white fashion, all the Witnesses I knew would spare no time in telling you how they weren't going to get a computer and use internet because it was dangerous. Anytime the GB issues a warning, it is immediately translated as, "avoid this at all costs." I've always been the black sheep thanks to this religion and even though I refuse to give up on my faith and what I believe in, the black and white thinking has made me largely avoid people all together because I can't please the Witnesses nor anyone of the world.
Anytime there is is nu-light that apparently contradicts old teachings and understandings, ask yourself, "Was it true then or is it true now?" Truth is truth and will always be the truth.
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Will JW.ORG actually harm the WT Society Long Term ?
by flipper inmy son and i were discussing this yesterday over coffee.
since the wt society in previous years virtually demonized going on the internet at all for jw's - now wt leaders are doing a complete turn around or about face probably so as to " compete " or keep up with all the anti-jw websites that are out there to give the wt society point of view.. however- it very well may backfire on them as once people start doing google searches looking for jw.org it will bring up all the other websites dealing with any jw issues and in the privacy of their own homes out of curiosity i'm sure lots of jw's are going to want to check out some of these sites to see what all the " apostate " hoopla is all about.
i wonder how many jw's will do this and will it have an effect in opening more minds to other views ?
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silent
What absolutely disgusts me more than anything about this jw.org website is that while I was growing up, I was one of the first people in the entire town to have a computer. My brother and I would joke and say, "I wonder how long we will have a computer before an article will come out warning us about the perils of computer use?" Of course it finally came out about 3 years later and all the old bats would look over their noses at us during the WT Study. For a fact, at one time if you owned a computer and it was known, you were scorned or looked at as a bit worldly. All the articles warning about the perils of internet and pornography that have come out since and now they pour all their efforts into the very media and the tools to access that media to the point that people are actually using their electronic devices in the Kingdom Halls. I distinctly remember articles that basically said you MUST show people right from the Bible itself and use the publications themselves - no substitutes. Even bringing printouts of the Watchtower was a sure sign that you would be ostracized because it was proof you dabbled in electronic media of some sort. I just can't believe what I'm seeing. Running JW.org online is akin to putting up a literature stand in a shop that sells pornography. I'm not against them running jw.org, but I'm so sick and tired of the blatant abuse I have had to put up with over the years from the most myopic-minded individuals I've ever known in my life. Now they all own computers because the Society says it's okay either directly or by the very fact that they run a website and well....you gotta access it somehow right? (justification!!!) The way they are going at it, you'd swear it was the late 90s all over again.
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Elders, apostasy and disfellowshipping issue's - thoughts please
by FeelingFree inok so... when i was talking to my mil about why i no longer wanted to be a witness she kept trying to convience me that i needed to speak to the elders.
i said from the word go i didn't feel the need to as my mind was already made up and no one could change it.
i also said if the elders new all my reasons for leaving they would view me as an apostate and i would get disfellowshipped.
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silent
The bottom line is this: If you talk, you give them proof and thereby a justification to DF you. There is NO amount of love bombing, kind words, double-talk, etc. that will change this...PERIOD! As long as you stay vague, disappear, fade, keep a smile on your face and friendly with them when you see them, you at least cast doubt on your reasons why you left. As long as you stay in this state, you're fine. There is no other way.
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Am I the youngest one on here?
by Capstone ini finally registered on here after reading on the forum for almost two years on and off (more often the last year).
to give you some background on who i am i can say that i'm a girl in my late teens and live in western europe.
my mom is a jw and my dad is not.
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silent
With the counsel against higher education, how are you supposed to be no part of this world when you have to go on welfare to support yourself? That makes you MORE a part of this system. And how are you to have any money left over for the donation box? I've often said to my wife, "Since other religions have their own schools, instead of the JWs telling their rank and file that it's basically a sin to further your education in the world's system, why don't they open up their own colleges and universities to teach skills so that the rank and file can get jobs? At least they might be able to educate a new generation of minion who can afford to put in more than 25 cents a week.
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JW's and depression
by FeelingFree ini was wondering how many of you suffered badly with depression when you were in "the truth" and if you feel your depression was related to being part of the organisation?
are you better now you have left or still have issue's?
whatever your experience's i would be very intrested to know (if you feel you can talk about it.).
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silent
I had quit going to meetings in the mid-90s becoming quite disillusioned with it all and enjoying my freedom and life in general. I was still plagued with fears of Armageddon after being scarred over the years from seeing the depictions of people in the literature dying at Armageddon. I started going back to meetings in 2001 right after the attack on the World Trade Center - figuring this was the start of Armageddon. Funny thing, just in order to go back to the meetings, I had to get on a steady dose of anti-depressants due to severe suicidal thoughts and never, ever feeling good enough about myself because no matter what you do, it's never good enough in that religion. Finally I had enough again and was just sick and tired of having to be on an anti-depressant (Celexa and Paxil) and popping a sedative (Lorazepam) before every meeting just to be able to go not to mention all the embrassing trips to the doctor. I quit going to the meetings cold turkey, did the same with my pills, and have been off of anti-depressants for 5 years. I told an elder that as soon as the congregation pays for my pills, I'll be able to go back. No offers yet.
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My JW Life... (LONG)
by silent ini never, ever thought i would ever be posting on a board such as this but here i am.
i've been reading the boards for several months and despite my initial conscience twinges, i couldn't help but follow a logical thought process on many issues that were causing me grief.
over this past week, due to the things i've read on here, i've had a massive cloud lift from me and i'm starting to feel joy and love in my heart that i've *never* felt before.
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silent
Been really busy but I wanted to post a follow up. My wife and I have done the fade and are happily married almost 2 years now. We're working on building up a life we should have been building 20 years ago, so yeah...we're late bloomers but managing quite well. We've gone to memorial and have gotten the evil eye stares and such so after memorial, that's good enough for the year. It's be different if we were liked and respected, but we're not, so I stay away. The fear levels have drastically dropped and I don't get so depressed any more. I don't take any meds other than for weight-related hypertension and I've lost over 30 pounds in months.
I'm doing great. Marriage ain't easy, but it beats being alone and having some supposed gift of singleness (which is nothing more than a hormonal problem or a closet-masturbator.)
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9
Pretending to be the Governing Body
by edmond dantes inlets pretend we are of the governing body in brooklyn .
what proposals would you put before the members .
you can vote and add ammendments if you like.
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silent
I would drop all service hour requirements and titles related to service hours. It's a personal matter between that individual and Jehovah and is a matter of conscience and part of working out your own salvation. Then I set about the arderous task of reviewing all policies and procedures and strip out any of them that have zero basis in the bible and are a fabrication of man. Jesus simply sent out his disciples by twos. They weren't called pioneers and there is no mention of any hour requirement. All congregations would be encouraged to have picnics throughout the year where applicable or fun events much like organized youth groups and so forth. Everyone would be encouraged to go to school - not to make the making of money a goal in life, but so that you standard of living is such that you have much to be thankful for and then people would have money to put in the box if they so desired. There would be one meeting a week (Sunday discourse and WT study) and informal meetings for service if any so desired, but not mandatory. (It's hard enough as it is.) And the one meeting a week mimics the reading of the law once a week to serve as a reminder. Anyone who is single and can't seem to find someone to marry could log into a website run and sponsored by the organization so that they can have help finding someone. No chaperones needed - just behave yourself and if you fornicate, you can choose to get married immediately after confession, or be DF'd until you get things sorted out. Basically it needs to be structured so you feel good in it, (not to tickle ears), but something more than rudimentary study all the time. Also, an immediate accounting of all brothers in position if a complaint is leveled against them. That's the only way you keep people in power in check is make them easy to oust. If 2 people got together and filed a complaint and signed it, that elder would be immediately removed for one year. That would encourage them to really have care and compassion and to conduct themselves humbly before others. If they knew they could get the boot over one occurance of mistreatment, they'd shape up or be ousted. I've got more ideas, but basically, I'd hate to be on the governing body. I can't stand all the negative stuff that led me to almost kill myself and take sedatives so I could go.