I faded and took a few baby steps. I was such a rebel to wear a red sweater instead of a suit jacket at the Kingdom Hall.
My point is that you will be able to laugh at your progress afterward.
I hope this helps- It is not immoral to attend a party, as long as you don't intend to behead anyone. I hope you start to discard the idea that you "engage in immorality" when you violate their stupid rules.
Go buy a lottery ticket or say a curse word. Donate blood. See a movie they would never approve of. Do somethings that help you see that lightning won't strike you.