Hello Lin,
I'm sorry about the above...lol I don't even know how I managed that. Anyway, I was interested in your post. I live in PA and we get Chuck Swindall here on a radio program as well. I like him too. I, just like you have been thru a lot of soul searchin and pretty much believe what you do. There is the truth out there. I found Jesus to be just that truth....literally. After many years of prayer and reading..the berean that I am, I discovered that. I asked Jesus into my life and since that time He has given me much understanding. He fed me thru scripture very slowly, like I was a baby so that I wasn't given too much at one time. So cool, because I need to slowly absorb stuff in order to process it..lol. I'm sure he'd do the same for you, if he isn't already.
I only have one word of caution to you though, if your'e like me and it sounds like you are.......try to remember not to judge the people in the church. They cannot relate to us xjw's. We sound looney as all get out to them! I'm sure you'll find some loving, warm friends in Christ and hang onto them. They can be extremely helpful in teaching you a 'different' way of thinking. Just remeber too though that we are still here for you when/if you need us wacko's to relate to with our xdub-mentality.
I, too attended a church and found many loving sisters in Christ, because my fleshly sisters no longer spoke to me. I even met a woman who was like a mama to me!!!! Those people were more loving to me than anyone ever was.Sadly, we moved and I haven't made that step yet in my new home. I will though. Lots of love to you, Lin. Oh, and by the way....I have a Methodist sister-in-law (married to my dubby bro) She puts up with a lot from him and does it wonderfully. Methodists and Mostly all the other denominations believe basically the same thing....Saved by Grace not by Works and that fruits flow from us as a result of our re-birth. Jesus is our mediator....etc. The worst part for me was the trinity, by far. I have even been given the food to comprehend that. UNBELIEVABLE. Be patient, sweetie. He is Faithful!!! love, dj