there was a man at my hall who was married and had two young children, but he always gave me the creeps. One day he came up to me at the hall and said "put your hand in my pocket" me of course "umm no" , now I was only about 12 at the time but all my instincts were saying to get away from him. So anyway he grabs my hand and sticks it in his pocket....to find sticky old candy. I told my mom about what happened and how it creeped me out. A few months later this guy was in jail for molesting a 13 year old girl!!!! ewww
lucifer
JoinedPosts by lucifer
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47
Whacky Witness Weirdness
by limbogirl inok, i'm sure all of us have met some incredibly bizarre jws over the years --- i have met some that could have been characters in a movie...just unbelievably weird.
i've shared some of my stories with a good friend (non jw) and she swears i'm making this stuff up.
how in the heck could i make these people up??
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22
Are there any funny stories in the bible?
by ballistic in.
i posted on a thread earlier that i'm sure jesus had a sense of humour.. i clicked submit post.. then i thought, yeah i'm sure he did but he didn't tell any jokes did he?
in fact i can't think of anything funny in the whole bible.. here's your chance to post a bible story that gets you roaring with laughter...
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lucifer
I don't remember the details, but some guy was beating his donkey for not moving and the donkey TALKS to him, but instead of thinking "Hey why is a donkey talking to me?" he replies to it, the nonsense of it all!
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18
Can a disassociated person attend the memorial?
by chok ini disassociated myself last year, because i refused to attend a jc!
i preferred to jump ship rather than be pushed!.
this year my parents have invited me to the memorial?
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lucifer
yes you can, the elders came to my door and left an invitation with my brother ( whose been DA'd longer than I have)
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61
Who's up for some fun?
by Inquisitor inshake things up a bit in your friendly local congregation of jehovah's witnesses by partaking of their memorial emblems this april 12!
when drinking the wine (i don't think you'd get to eating the bread if you carry this first part out), make sensual, sinful sounds of ecstasy!
better yet, noisily gulp down the whole glass of wine and top it with a little burp!
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lucifer
prince edward island...little to far to go to ontario, if thats where you are lol, but it would've been fun
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61
Who's up for some fun?
by Inquisitor inshake things up a bit in your friendly local congregation of jehovah's witnesses by partaking of their memorial emblems this april 12!
when drinking the wine (i don't think you'd get to eating the bread if you carry this first part out), make sensual, sinful sounds of ecstasy!
better yet, noisily gulp down the whole glass of wine and top it with a little burp!
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lucifer
oh man this thread is funny! I would pay to see my brother dress up like jesus(he has the beard,hippie thing going on) and go to the hall and sit in the front row.
You could always bring your own wine glass, and when they pass the glass to you, tip some of the wine in it and pass the other glass along, sip that wine innocently the rest of the service.
I've decided that I am going to the memorial, to wreak as much havoc as I can, I'll bring a camera with me and show you guys the pics later:)
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55
my pic
by osmosis in.
i see y'all upload your pics and i felt sooo left out, so.. here it is, here i am:.
(yes, i know i badly need a haircut in this pic).
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lucifer
I can see Keith Urban there to...very nice, and from Canada too!
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25
Name all the reasons why you should be "Disfellowshipped" or "Counselled"
by JH inwell, i should be counselled for:.
posting 10.000 times on this board .
going to apostofests .
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lucifer
-drinking excessively
-celebrating holidays
-smoking cigars(when I drink excessively lol)
-hanging out with boys alone *gasp*
-being on this board
-making plans for college
-swearing
-going to different churches....
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57
Create a New Name for Yourself!
by Scully inhere is your dose of humour for this afternoon:.
a. follow the instructions to find your new name.. .
b. once you have your new name, post it so we can all see it.
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lucifer
snooty dippen face .........haha thats funny because me and my friends all add the word "face" to the end of our names when we talk to each other like" hey tara face whats up? nothing desy face."
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38
READ THIS
by youpeoplearefunnyandsad inmost of you are apostates right?
or disfellowshiped?
do you not think its a little odd that you people all get together and make such an effort to put a religion down?that you get together and plot what you are going to do to disrupt things, that you are so bitter and twisted, that your expereicnces eat you up inside?
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lucifer
dear youpeople...thank you so much for your warning for us eager jws like yourself to stay off this site(but why were you here?) I like yourself want to please jeboobah, I am just as blind to the lies in the "truth" that you are, I like yourself, bug people saturday mornings, probably the only day those bad worldy people get to sleep in. I like yourself shun my own family if they don't agree with the sacred word of the watchto...uhh i mean bible. I like yourself would refuse to save my life or childs life by taking blood because the governing bod...uhh i mean god told us to( i think thats what the new light now is right??) I like yourself smile at the idea of armageddon, where millions of women, men and children will be murdered by our all loving god, but thats normal don't worry the watchtow...bible supports us. We have so much more in common....again thank you for not being a hypocrite telling others to stay off apostate sites when you are on one yourself, and yes I will count this as Time for the Service of Jeboobah, Thank you. Yours forever ,Lucifer
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41
If The Witnesses Started Going After You Now, What Would You Do?
by minimus inwould you respond to them?
let sleeping dogs lie?
go on the attack??
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lucifer
I would tell them they better stay at least ten feet away or they would be infected with Apostatitis, a disease that is spreading quite rapidly