Here is your dose of humour for this afternoon:
A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.
B. Once you have your new name, post it so we can all see it.
The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...
1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:
- a = snickle
- b = doombah
- c = goober
- d = cheesey
- e = crusty
- f = greasy
- g = dumbo
- h = farcus
- i = dorky
- j = doofus
- k = funky
- l = boobie
- m = sleezy
- n = sloopy
- o = fluffy
- p = stinky
- q = slimy
- r = dorfus
- s = snooty
- t = tootsie
- u = dipsy
- v = sneezy
- w = liver
- x = skippy
- y = dinky
- z = zippy
2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:
- a = dippin
- b = feather
- c = batty
- d = burger
- e = chicken
- f = barffyg
- g = lizard
- h = waffle
- i = farkle
- j = monkey
- k = flippin
- l = fricken
- m = bubble
- n = rhino
- o = potty
- p = hamster
- q = buckle
- r = gizzard
- s = lickin
- t = snickle
- u = chuckle
- v = pickle
- w = hubble
- x = dingle
- y = gorilla
- z = girdle
3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
- a = butt
- b = boob
- c = face
- d = nose
- e = hump
- f = breath
- g = pants
- h = shorts
- i = lips
- j = honker
- k = head
- l = tush
- m = chunks
- n = dunkin
- o = brains
- p = biscuits
- q = toes
- r = doodle
- s = fanny
- t = sniffer
- u = sprinkles
- v = frack
- w = squirt
- x = humperdinck
- y = hiney
- z = juice
Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny.
And mine is Sleezy Wafflehump.