Posts by atypical

17

Taking control over our lives.

by Lady Lee in

jw
friends

this is such a huge issue for me.

i don't want anyone to tell me what to do or how to live.

in part this is due to the control that the wts and the elders had over my life.

atypical

Lady Lee, thank you for this topic. I am in the middle of trying to fade away, and this is a huge issue for me. I have found that I will overreact to control, even at inappropriate times. Anytime I feel that I am being forced into something, I spiral into a mix of anger and panic.

I realize rationally that I am the only one who has control over my actions. This really is true pretty much all the time, unless somehow I get thrown into a concentration camp (well, it's something witnesses fear!). So I am trying to learn how to stop overreacting to what other people do, and start reacting to situations in the way that is best for me and mine.

Personally, I think witnesses are taught that other people are in control of their future, and if they do not please those people, Jehovah does not love them. It's really hard to shake off that thinking. On the flip side, I have developed a very bad attitude towards authority in general. I try to console myself with the old "Life is a Journey" thought and just keep trying.

58

What is Zen

by Enigma One in

after dumping the dub's i was against all religion of any kind.

slowly but surely i started to embrace a belief system that matched my own internal one.

part of my job takes me to asia.

atypical

I personally really appreciate James Thomas' approach. He doesn't seem self-centered to me, he seems the opposite. It's just that he's figured out that he has to remove his own sense of ego/identity in order to move on and figure out everything else. I may be over-simplifying, but that's how it seems to me.

23

HEY I MADE IT!!!!

by Pistoff in

jw
friends

you are lookin' at a jedi master my friend!!

congratulate me.

when i can to this place, i was one sick puppy.

atypical

Congratulations!! And you'll never have to "step down" or be "deleted" as a jedi master.

56

Poll: Is DEFD an apostate?

by wanderlustguy in

jw
friends

i vote yes.

atypical

Yes he is. Glad to have him. I think he feels compelled to always stick up for the wtbts because that's the only thing that would cover his ass if it was ever found out by the elders that he spends so much time here. If he really felt the way he says he does, what point would there be in hanging out here all the time?

No offense Defd. Just my take on it.

13

I may have sealed my fate - part three

by atypical in

jw
friends

i just wanted to give a quick update to anyone who might have read my earlier posts on this subject.. tonight my wife, who is very active in the hall, has a talk in the back school.

i haven't been to a meeting in about three months, and i really don't want to be there, but i want to support my wife.

but of course, the people who supposedly have so much love are making it a difficult decision for me.

atypical

Jourles, I think you are right. I read your story and learned a lot from it.

I am amazed at how hopeful they get when they think they might have something on one of the "flock".

40

Looking for some advice

by MuadDib in

jw
friends

i'm a young man raised in the jws, been meaning to get the hell out of dodge for a few years now (basically ever since starting a history degree and learning why the jw conception of history, science, and indeed of reality is so utterly nonsensical, in addition to having discovered girls and fun).

i have no qualms about leaving the organization, i don't care what the elders or anyone else think about my decision - with the exception of my family.

i love my family deeply and i know that my decision will really hurt them, especially my mother (a full-time pioneer), and this is making me hesitate to do what i know needs to be done in addition to causing me a lot of worry and stress.

atypical

I have a similar situation with family and a wife in the jws. Because of that, I have been trying to fade away without any kind of announcement. It's not that I care what the religion thinks of me, but I do care how it affects my relationships. I slowly started missing more and more meetings, getting less and less time in service, until I had stopped both. It can be a painful process, though, depending on the particular territory you live in. I personally have been hounded by brothers in the hall who so far are not giving up.

13

I may have sealed my fate - part three

by atypical in

jw
friends

i just wanted to give a quick update to anyone who might have read my earlier posts on this subject.. tonight my wife, who is very active in the hall, has a talk in the back school.

i haven't been to a meeting in about three months, and i really don't want to be there, but i want to support my wife.

but of course, the people who supposedly have so much love are making it a difficult decision for me.

atypical

Thanks for the advice, everybody. I agree YoursChelbie, they must be hoping to find some dirt on me by doing this "shepherding call". I heard someone call it "fishin' and wishin'"

that shepherding call will never happen. If I get cornered on it, I am going to tell them that I will let them know if I ever want a shepherding call.

As far as whether or not I go, I can see both sides of it. I agree with you, Jeff, that I can be there for her in spirit, but I guess I really want to be there in person for my wife. She has stood by me through all this, and even though she doesn't seem to have any doubts about the religion, she also has shown that she will not put up with anybody badmouthing me, even elders.

Serendipity, I like your plan as far as keeping a low profile is concerned.

Dave, Finally-Free, Crumpet and GBL, I like your direct approaches. They appeal to the attitude in me, and I think GBL is totally right about the pushover thing. I think that has hurt me in the past. Dave, your plan is great because a true personal problem always seems to send the brothers running!!

171

GAGS I HAVE PROUDLY PULLED ON JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES :)

by Nate Merit in

in 1984 (shudder!

) my bud mark smith and i picketed the kingdom hall in ann arbor, michigan.

our signs had a watchtower drawn on them and said 'this religion is a snare and a racket!

atypical

R6, you may need to go take an english class or something. You cut and pasted someone else's post, then added one sentence to say it is a lame excuse. If you have any argument at all, try spelling it out. Why is it a lame excuse? What do you find wrong with that particular post, which by the way is describing a paradigm shift? A paradigm shift is what happens when someone suddenly looks at the same situation in a completely different way.

For example, if I were to read your posts for the first time, I would say: "That R6 is very inarticulate and insulting." However, if I were to find out that you had been living with extreme brain damage from a childhood injury, I would have a paradigm shift. Then I would say, "For someone with only half a brain, R6 does a fair job of expressing himself."

See how it works?

13

I may have sealed my fate - part three

by atypical in

jw
friends

i just wanted to give a quick update to anyone who might have read my earlier posts on this subject.. tonight my wife, who is very active in the hall, has a talk in the back school.

i haven't been to a meeting in about three months, and i really don't want to be there, but i want to support my wife.

but of course, the people who supposedly have so much love are making it a difficult decision for me.

atypical

I just wanted to give a quick update to anyone who might have read my earlier posts on this subject.

Tonight my wife, who is very active in the hall, has a talk in the back school. I would like to go with her. I haven't been to a meeting in about three months, and I really don't want to be there, but I want to support my wife. But of course, the people who supposedly have so much love are making it a difficult decision for me. Two nights ago an elder called our phone at ten o'clock at night and left a message wanting to know when he and the PO could come by for a sheperding call. This elder is the same man who has told ones in the hall that I am "bad association". This is the third time he has asked to come by. It reminds me of Randy Watters' story. I do not know if it is significant at all that he wants to bring the PO, instead of just a ministerial servant in training, as is usually the case.

To make it more complicated, my wife's talk is with the daughter of this same elder. I feel like I will be walking into a trap if I go. But it makes me angry to think even for a second that my freedom is restricted.

To make matters worse, I almost get the feeling that it will be a stress on my wife if I go, since she will be worried the whole time if something is going to happen. I have a way of getting very nasty when I get pushed to far. I don't yell or turn red, I don't cuss, but I very quietly state my feelings and will not walk away until I have made my point to whoever needs to hear. Of course, knowing what I know, that could get me a free trip to df land.

I have tried very hard to deal with my situation personally, without trying to stop my wife from engaging in service or other activities, and it blows my mind that it should be a problem for her and I to be together for her talk tonight. I guess I can't have it both ways.

35

Hello Everyone From a Newby

by Apostate Kate in

jw
friends

i just wanted to introduce myself.

i have read many threads here for several years, but never made a commitment to stick around.

tonight i understand why.

atypical

Welcome Kate.