Family tragedy.........HappyDad

by HappyDad 142 Replies latest social family

  • z

    I am so sorry for your family's loss

  • stillconcerned


  • candidlynuts

    HappyDad, i dont know what made me think of your family today but it did pop into my mind and i looked it up and sure enough its been about a year.

    (wierd how my brain works)

    i hope this year has helped ease some of the pain of your loss although i know it will never go away all together.

    continued prayers for you all.



  • KW13
  • crazyblondeb

    I saw this and also wanted to add my prayers and hugs. I know they say time heals all, but losing kids is never easy at any time!


  • BluesBrother

    Anniversaries are always hard , you have our thoughts and prayers at tthis time....

    What good lady is candidlynuts for bringing this to our attention ..........

  • JWdaughter

    Reading this thread was heartwrenching. My sympathy goes out to HappyDad and all those he loves. I hope time truly does heal these wounds. Shelly

  • FreedomFrog

    Oh wow, HD. I'm so sorry for your losses. I wasn't on the forum last year much so I didn't even know this happened. I've been crying for you and your family. To lose children/grandchildren at a very young age (really at ANY age), I can't even imagine. All I could think of was what the mother of the kids (since I have 2 kids myself) is going through since she has to deal with the "responsibility" of what happened even though it was an accident.

    I will send you and your family some positive energies your way.

  • HappyDad

    Hey candidleynuts and the rest,

    Wow.........I re-read what I wrote last year and all I can think about is how fast this past year has gone. Thanks for all of your thoughts.

    Since this topic has been brought back to the top, I guess I should inform all of you what has happened this past year.

    This is long, but I have to vent.

    First, I need to say that what I am about to type is in no way complaining and lamenting what has happened to me and my daughter since this tragedy. We are both happy and doing as well as we can under the circumstances.

    Here goes.

    I flew home after the funeral last year and shortly afterward Ron started all kind of crazyness with my daughter. To make a long story short........Ron had been having an affair unknown to my daughter......but she found out. He basically told her to screw off ......that he would do whatever he wanted to do. It took a couple of weeks, but it seemed that they worked it out. My daughter was willing to forgive if he would stop his extracurricular activity. He started acting normal again. (it was just an act to throw her off)

    They wanted me to come back down for I booked a flight and was thinking all was well. NOT! Before I got there, thing came to a head again. He was still seeing this person he met on the internet and lying to my daughter about his whereabouts. I got there three days before Thanksgiving. Things were not good at all. The next day, Ron comes home with the truck and packs all of his stuff and leaves. He already had rented another place and left my daughter stuck with all the bills from the house they were in plus $1200.00 a month rent. I wanted to kill him!

    Without going into all of the emotional feelings and rage that we daughter and I spent the next two weeks finding her an apartment. Thank God her landlord was a very understanding person and didn't keep her to the lease. They knew Ron was a jerk because the landlord entered a business deal with Ron that he did not live up to.

    I had to come back home but my daughter couldn't move for another two to three weeks. Here is where the love of good Christian people comes into the picture. Jumping back in daughter started back to church and Ron wasn't quite happy about it even though he was raised as a church going Baptist. It seems that Ron started acting wierd from then on, until the culmination of the relationship.

    As much as I wanted to be there to help her, I could not be there. Her friends from her church reassured me that I had nothing to worry about, that they would take care of everything. THEY DID. My daughter and I were NEVER shown an inkling of this type of love when we were JW's. I am forever grateful to these people and I will show some of this gratitude when I am there this coming September.

    It wasn't long after this that Ron called her about 3 in the morning crying that he didn't know where he was. Seems his new live in girlfriend got him into some of the drugs and booze that she liked and it almost killed Ron. He begged my daughter to find him and help him. Damn it.......she was able to get some info out of him as to where he was and she was able to find him. But the cops already were there too! To make a long story short.......he would either be taken to jail, or she could take him home. She took him back to her apartment and let him sleep it off until she had to go to work that morning. He wanted to stay and sleep the day away but she told him to get his ass up......she would drive him to whereever he wanted or she would call the cops to get him out. He was still in bad shape but she got rid of him I guess the love you have for someone who even hurts you so bad still makes you want to help!

    My daughter is very happy these days being free from him. She has started back with her online degree through the University of Pheonix, has a decent job, a ton of friends, and is very active in her church. I am very proud of her.

    On the other life is totally ruined financially because of Ron. I loved him like a son and was the only father figure he has known since he was a little boy. I saw how hard he worked at getting his business going and how he wanted to provide for my daughter. So what did I do? I didn't have any money, but I had excellent credit and could have bought anything. So at Ron's urging, I financed a truck for his moving business......he made the payments. I got a corporate line of credit for the business.........he made the payments.

    He was a LIAR when he said all the bills were being paid. The business was doing close to $450,000 a year. The employees were getting paid $12.00 an hour and the accountant said all was well. Com March of this year, the truck was repossed with a $30,000 plus balance still on it........IN MY NAME. I started getting calls from creditors about the corporate wasn't paid in months and it seems that Ron also got more money available on it and ran it up to over $60,000 dollars.........they want me to pay. And he also got another account in my name and ran it up to $10,000 at Home Depot................they want me to pay. Who knows what else there is? My next few months will have some stress no doubt..........but guess what? You can't get blood out of a turnip. I have no assets or estate to pay these bills. I am trying to get them to prosecute Ron for falsefying this crap.

    Bottom line is..........I am responsible since I am the primary creditor, but there is nothing I can pay toward these bills. I understand they can put a lease on my house, but cannot attach my ension fund.

    How am I coping about it? To be honest.......I am mostly calm since it is something I cannot control. I don't like what is happening but it is out of my hands. I have to live the best life I can for whatever years I have left. Eventually.....Ron will have to answer for all of this.

    Oh yes..............we found out that he was not paying income tax on this money either. That's why the account dropped him. The IRS has been duly informed.

    I'll never be able to buy anything on credit again but I will get by.

    My life is full otherwise.

    Thanks for listening.


  • hubert

    Thanks for the update. Sorry to hear about all your financial problems because of the son-in-law. Glad to hear your daughter didn't take the scumbag back in permanently. Glad to hear you are both coping with the loss of the kids. Hugs and prayers.... Hubert

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