ITHINKISEE: The SH*T hit the fan last night. (Update!)

by ithinkisee 89 Replies latest members private

• 

  ithinkisee

  Thanks for reminding me!

  She did actually ask the elders about 607 vs 586.

  Last night she said she was surprised that not one of the elders, or elder's wives even knew there was an issue with 607. I pointed out that the last time they attempted to confront it head-on was in 1981 in the appendix of the "Kingdom Come" book. And I explained the reason why they did that back then. I pointed out that according to the reviews of Ray Franz's book on Amazon.com several brothers in the writing department (including him) had gone all over the world in their attempt to back up 607 BC. The found no support from any scholars, archeologists, or anything. So then everything apparetnly came to a head when he questioned why the Governing Body attempted to exert so much authority over people's lives when they could not even prove they had the authority.

  It turns out some of the stuff in those folders were, (1) a scan of the Kingdom Come appendix with all my handwritten notes on it, (2) an actual Time Magazine article scan on Ray Franz and his exodus from the Society.

  So I explained, coincidentally after that, they booted him and several members of the writing department, published all kinds of articles reminding the congregations of their authority, and changed the disfellowshipping policy from one where you COULD talk to them to one where you were NOT allowed to talk to them.

  I told her that it was my opinion only, but it appears that the Society would prefer that people not dwell on their authority. They preferred to get rid of the people and bury the evidence. They have everything to lose if Jerusalem was destroyed in 586 and not 607.

  We talked a little on the subject of apostates. I admitted there are many wackjobs out there, but I believe there are others who simply would like to stop practicing the JW religion and would like to leave quietly. But the Society doesn't allow you to even do that without losing your family and friends.

  -ithinkisee
• 

  RunningMan

  I've been through this, and personally, I think you're going to win this one. Be careful.
  
  
  I also found that a picture is worth a thousand words. After quoting one of the scriptures that you mentioned (about not following anyone who says that the kingdom of God has approached - the NWT wording is truly priceless in this case). I pulled out the book titled "God's Kingdom of a thousand years has approached". It was a turning point moment.
• 

  ithinkisee

  Thanks RunningMan. I did that myself. Although I couldn't find the book anywhere ... but I said the title and she knew exactly what book that was.

  She has had her beliefs shaken to their very core. I can see it in her eyes and her mannerisms. It is an awful feeling in my stomach that I am responsible for it. I just have to keep reassuring myself and remembering to flood her with positivity - in spite of the negativity I am bringing up regarding the JWs.

  -ithinkisee
• 

  jaredg

  you know what i think is going to happen. i think that your wife will slowly see the light and realise the manipulation that the WTS uses to control the R&F. there will be a breaking point, for me it was at a meeting, where the way she listen's to the talks will be from a different point of view and then it will all make sense. once you know the truth about the truth it's painfull to sit through a meeting. after that she won't go any more. i wish you the best of luck ITIS! my thoughts are with you and you family.
• 

  Cygnus

  I have to agree with earlier comments about the new jerusalem bible. I bought it when I quit the JWs and it's a fun Bible to read... if you're into that sort of thing. I think I sold mine on ebay last year. Edited to add: a lot of your story is familiar to me as well, like others have stated. I went through all of this a few years ago when I divorced my JW wife. She wasn't nearly as receptive to talking as yours is, or sharing her feelings, but before I left her she did exclaim once, "I want a Christian husband!" I said, well, there you go, I'm not a Christian.
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  ((((( ITIS )))) (((( ITIS-wife)))))

  Hugs and love to you both. My wish for you is the best outcome possible... that you both end up on the same, or similar page.

  Once she sees the light and becomes willing... the move to NC can be a very possitive one for her. One where she can get involved in volunteer work for a (maybe non-christian or eccumenical) organization, or involved in the children's schools with PTSA, or otherwise involved to replace her time spent on the bOrganization. This will both help replace her time, get her involved in her new community, and help her create a new community of friends for herself.

  With much love

  Brenda
• 

  ithinkisee

  thanks everyone, for the positive words.

  I have a new update here:

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/96733/1.ashx

  -ithinkisee
• 

  Jourles

  This whole process will take a little bit of time. Do not change your overall personality if you stop cold turkey from attending the meetings. What I mean is, don't go out drinking, gambling, smoking, whooping it up, etc. -- things you wouldn't normally do as a witness. If your wife views you doing anything that the org would look down upon, she might think that those activites were the real reasons for you leaving the truth. Keep doing things with the family as you have always done, minus the org stuff obviously.

  I used to drop little news articles on my wife about this and that until she got really frustrated and told me to stop doing it.(I was still a jw at the time, inactive though) Trying to talk about anything doctrinal would end with her basically accusing me of apostacy -- even with using ONLY the WTS publications at that! Trying to push my thoughts on her and showing articles and such that went against the org only shut her down and tended to make her cry. I stopped. Our relationship got better the less I talked about the org/doctrines.

  I had already been inactive for quite a few years before I was finally df'd this year. I think the biggest thing she was worried about the most was me leaving her. She honestly thought that I would take off if I was df'd and leave her stranded. I had to keep reminding her(and we still joke about it to this day), that she would be the one leaving me before I ever left her. She'll occasionally say something like this: "Are you ever gonna leave me?" Me: "Yeah right! (speaking jokingly) You'll be the one leaving me!"

  She is perfectly fine with my status today. We get along better it seems now that I'm df'd. Don't get me wrong, she is sad that I'm not a jw anymore and it does put a minor crimp in some of our activities that used to include other JW families. But all in all, I've got plenty to do to keep me busy outside of the congregation wall(some of those activities includes time spent with worldly people *gasp*). And if we weren't doing so well together, we wouldn't be going down to Cancun next month.

  From what you have written, she seems like the type that might come around. Maybe not the type to totally leave the org, but at least understand what you are going through and accept it. In her mind, she might be thinking that you will, in the future, come to your senses and that she will be able to win you back to the org by her attitude and speech. I know my wife hopes for this as she had an uncle who did the same thing. I think Valis might even know who this person is.(hint for Valis - remember my wife's cousin I told you about who got married and was at bethel? the uncle who I speak of is his dad - he is an elder now.)
• 

  AK - Jeff

  WOW!!!!!

  I think you and I are twins in regard not being able to keep tight-lipped about these kind of things. I don't know how I have escaped the big JC meetings, since I have informed several people of my feelings in regard to the cult.

  But, I had one tremendous advantage. My wife and I learned the truth about the 'Truth' together, reasoned together thru the process, and left together.

  I think the flowers and dinner is a good idea to boost her awareness that you have no intention of hurting her thru this ordeal.

  Somewhere soon, since she seems to be craving some sort of 'spiritual lead' from you, I suggest that you might just take the Bible alone and read it together. Tell her you want to see what it actually says without any religious filters. So no publications, no Bible commentaries. If the Bible doesn't say it, not interested. In this way, you take the opportunity she has offered, and you begin to discover together what the Bible really says, being careful not to heavily criticize the organization. Soon she will see the Bible in a different light perhaps. I would reccomend using a different translation, justified by the feeling that 'if we are indoctrinated, then we will be triggered by certain words in certain scriptures'. Perhaps in this way you can discover the truth together about the false doctrines of JW's.

  Although she is unaware of it, you are taking a lead now. Keep us informed.

  Jeff
• 

  katiekitten

  Im so fucking proud of you.

  You both needed that chat.

  You will reap what you sew, and from that indepth honest discussion it can only be good (even if it feels bad for a while).