by stevepill 73 Replies latest jw experiences
Hi stevepill,
As I wrote before, watch "To Verdener (Worlds Apart with English subtitles)" with her and just ask her if that is how many JWs behave. To Verdener is a Danish movie that is like a JW Romeo and Juliet. Drink some wine eat some snacks and enjoy a good movie. Don't ask her questions that she may feel will make her defend the WTBTS's doctrines. Just ask her if the movie represents how many JWs behave.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert
I could leave the COC book with her and the offer of my help, maybe one day she will get curious. I think by me pushing her for an answer now it's making it worse.
You have decided you will marry this lady haven't you Steve? Pushing her for an answer is making what worse? So you can't talk to this woman without her getting upset. Great start to a marriage. We have tried, Sweetie.
Stevepill, you seem to be a little indecisive here.
What do you want in the relationship?
What are you worried about?
Stand your ground, man up.
JW is not just a religion, it is an identity. It is based on fear, guilt, promises never realized, it runs deep. Your girlfriend clearly struggles with the JW identity. Whether she is living it or not, it is her foundation and until that foundation is recognized as flawed by her, anything else in her life is built upon it.
She has two failed marriages as it is. She needs to address her issues and until she is willing to take an honest look at her foundation, she will only address symptoms. Major events in life will cause her to reflect on the indoctrination and may very well drive her back to the religion at some time. Even if it doesn't, she will always have difficulties if she believes that it might possibly be The Truth.
When she has her own kids, even if she was willing to sacrifice her own life and ignore her faith, she won't be willing to let her kids die at Armageddon. If she believes the religion, she will want to return to it because in her mind not doing so would be a death sentence to her children.
