Will my inactive JW bring our children up as a witness?
I have been with an in active Jw for 6 years, she now wants to marry and have a child, will she want to bring a child up as a witness, she says not but any experiences? Will she start go back once we are married? (I'm a non Jw)
It has been my observation that she will, largely due to the pressure that will be put on her by the others.
Thank you for replying, this stuff really messes with my mind, feel like I'm going mad, am I being to over cautious?
yes she will unless she doesnt believe in the cult herself and is just in for family reasons.
If her parents or other family are in the cult then you can expect extreme levels of interference in how your child is raised and indoctrinated even against your will.
It is a cult, expect them to behave accordingly. Having a child or even a relationship with an active JW is a recipe for heartache and stress.
It might depend upon why she is inactive.
Is it because she has been DFd or is "laying low" because she is in an "immoral" relationship with you?
Or, is it because she really does not believe the doctrines of the religion at this point?
If it's the first scenario, then by being married she could return to the Cong in "good standing". If she's DFd, it might take a year to get the status of "good standing" back, but it will come if she is persistent.
If it's the latter, then she'll probably not do much than she already is.
You are in a very difficult situation. If SHE is only inactive but still a JW, EVERY JW will always try to get her back to be an active JW. If she still believe, JW ist "the truth", she could go back every moment. You never will know - maybe she will never, maybe tomorrow, maybe in 1 year.
But - she can only go back, if she do NOT live together with a person without be married.
In my opinion the only way is, to show her, that JW don't have the truth.
A believing Witness won't date a non-JW, certainly not for six years, she won't marry him either. She might be effectively a former Witness if she's wanting to make her life with you. You're obviously not with a regular, hard-core, believing JW.
Therefore our experiences may be of only partial help to understand her evidently idiosyncratic relationship with the religion.
Whatever's been going on for the last six years might be a fair guide to what the future might hold?
You could always ask her. Make it clear that if you have a child you never want them to step their foot in a KH. Her response will tell u a lot.
I did say that to her and she said she may need to take them on odd occasion of she goes back, but doesn't want to be told she can't take them.
If your future wife becomes 'active' again, she will definitely try and bring your kids up as Witnesses - bet my life on it!!! Then your troubles will really begin!
Odd occasions? If you believe that.......................
Years ago I knew a lovely Witness sister who was a single mother.
While on holiday, she met and fell in love with a non-Witness. Outcome? She told her Witness friends that "she was going to be disfellowshipped for her relationship, but after they got married, she'd come back into "the truth"!
Shows the mentality of some. Some time after she got disfellowshipped, the guy dumped her!