by whyamihere 75 Replies latest jw friends
Hmmmmmm...these are very funny. The only thing I can think of is sticking my tongue on a swingset in December in Wi and having it get stuck on it. But I was only like 7 so I guess that was just a dumb kid thing to do. But I do remember feeling pretty stupid standing there until someone brought out some warm water to get it dislodged from it's frozen location.
Brookie...you're hilarious .
mumsy
I love that little laughing smilie!
Where did you get it from?
Well..one of the most embarrasing moments was getting a black eye. Hubby and I were camping with some other witnesses and we were sleeping in tents..well I rolled over to wake up hubby and he rolled over and hit me in the eye with his elbow..it was only a matter of minutes that my eye turned black and blue..why does everyone thing you get black eyes from a fist?
I took a lot of heat from that..and it was embarrasing because we were the perfect married couple and they kept teasing us about fighting..God..what a wimp I was!
And my poor daughter fell on a bar on a jungle gym her leg sliipped when climbing and she straddled the bar from quite a distance and bruised her pelvic area so bad she couldn't pee..it burned too bad..
I took her to the Pediatrician (sp)and he had to examine her there..she covered her head she was so embarrased.I felt so bad for her.. she was about 11 at the time. She had to sit in water to go pee for a while..I always wondered if she was still a virgin..she really fell hard..she was black and blue all over that area..she couldn't do much for a while because she couldn't walk!
Then my other daugter and her younger brother were playing when they were little(He 3 her 5) . She always liked to play like she was a doggie and would crawl around on all fours and growl..(Wierd kid) but my son loved it! Well she was growling and came up to him and bit him right on his penis..he screamed and came running..I examined it and it had teeth marks on it and was bleeding. Well..I took him to the Dr to make sure everything was OK but it sure was embarassing telling him how it happened..he already though I was stupid from another incident! The Medicine and the eye incident!..That's another story..I already told it somewhere...
Snoozy..
Oh yeah..then there was the time we got caught in the backseat of a car in the park..doing it!.(park Ranger).You go into total shock when they tap on the car window and you don't think anyones around! I think they sit there with binoculars until just the right minute and then pounce on you!..Dirty old men! Never wanted to go back to that park! Hubby went out and talked to them while I got dressed..women have it tough! Men just unzip!..(Carefully)
The we fell asleep in the back seat (again) of the car at a drive in movie..about 3 A.M. someone again tapped on the window and scared the pitooey out of us! We were the only car left in the drive in..(At least we were dressed that time!)
Never wanted to go back there again either!.. (Until we got a different car)
Snoozy..funny..the older you get..the more stories you got..but some of the ones from younguns here are pretty funny!
Hey Golden girl.
Your embarasing moment in the car reminds me of a funny incident. It didn't happen to me though.
I was a sheriffs deputy and we worked in pairs at that time. There was a small hill in the area where the teens would come to after a movie or such and a little necking would take place.
At curfew it was our job to send them home. Usually we would lite the car with a spot lite and they would fire up and leave.
This one car didn't. So we walked up to it, me on the passenger side and partner on drivers side.
These kids were really going after it. He taps the window with the flashlite and the kid rolls down the window.
Partner asks them what they were doing. Driver says we were only necking officer.
Partner says "well put your neck back in your pants and GO HOME".
I burst out laughing and to this day it makes me smile to think of it.
Outoftheorg
I am an accident waiting to happen. Had some real funny ones. A few years ago I was in bed and sometime during the night my covers ended up at the bottom of the bed so I yanked really hard on the sheet to pull it up and for some reason my baby toe was wrapped around the sheet and as I pulled it up I broke my toe. I couldn't believe my whole foot was black and blue. I went to see my doctor and he said how on earth did you break your baby toe, I told him and he started laughing really hard and said that was the funniest thing he had ever heard and said okay really what did happen were you having some kinky sex or what. Talk about embarrassing
Then there was the time I went to take a hot dish out of the over and I bent down kind of low and as I was pulling the dish out it hit my boob and wow did that ever smart and I had a huge burn scar across my one boob and the doctor said how did you do that and I told him and he said weren't you wearing any clothes and I said no I was naked and again he laughed and said , "only you"
Then there was the time I plugged in my iron and I went to test it to see how hot it was and sure enought I did exactly the same thing as above, I had the iron hit my boob and it left a bad burn scar and the doctor said how many times are you intending to kill your boobs. My thinks that is why I had eights pounds taken off my hooters because they were the size of scooters...
And one day I was opening the van door and hit my forehead on the door frame and my glasses went flying into the air and fell and the lens popped out. Gee I was batting a thousand. And a huge gash on the forehead. yes only me.
Talking about doing bodily injury. I was trying to learn to water ski at my uncles home in Haliburton Ontario. I was having a hell of a time getting up and staying up. So my uncle sat me at the dock and then rammed the boat engine and I flew up into the air and plunged down into the lake. Afer many many attempts at trying to be a skier, my uncle threw in the towel and said terry your a bump on a log.
When living in Quebec I was up visiting several french friends in Windsor Falls and this brother and sister had a nice home on the lake. Well there were two boat and one was a canoe. The sisters I went with decided to use the flat bottom boat and so I was stuck with the canoe and because my nick name was fish everyone knew I was a great swimmer. It was May 24 weekend and the water was still kind of cold. Anyways the girls in the flat bottom boat decided to get smart and started throwing a bucket of water on me in the canoe. I was with a french brother who spoke not a word of english any way after the girls did that I picked up my oar and of course forgetting I am in a canoe take the paddle and ram it side ways into the water and all of a sudden that immpact on the water caused the canoe to capsize. I mean that water was cold!!!. the french brother came up from underneath the canoe and said okay okay okay and i told him oui oui je suis okay and we started laughing so hard. Then because I was already wet I swam to the girls boat and started rocking it up and down and they were screaming no no dont' don't throw us in the water. So after giving them a hell of a scare the brother and I turned the canoe upright and went to a marshy spot to get back in and then we headed back to the dock. Wow you never seen three girls run so fast when I got to shore we were laughing so hard I peed myself pn top of already being drenched. What a goof. It took hours to get my clothes dry and because I am large the sister in her home had no large clothing I could wear while waiting for mine to dry and the husband wasn't big either but somehow we divised away with a blanket and wrapped around me and we all sat down to dinner and everyone was giggling their fool heads off. I was trying so hard not to explode. MY clothes never dried so the sister loaned me her iron to try and warm up my close and NO I DIDN'T BURN MYSELF this time....
Two years ago while camping I was trying to put up a new tent with my girlfriend well we were having a hell of a time putting it up and the more we tried getting it up the more we laughed and the more I laughed I peed myself. I must have peed myself four of five times before we got that damn tent up. Talk about embarrasing.
Holy smokes I have so many tales to tell. Better leave some for another day.
So how is your day.??
Love Orangefatcat
Orangefat cat..those are so funny..painful but funny!
When I was about 7 months pregnant We (Hubby , my father in law, and I )were cleaning a rug that we had put in the back yard to clean..they told me to sweep it and they would hold it..well I started sweeping and then I started farting!..Not just once..like a freight train..and the more the baby kicked the more I farted.. hubby and his dad was laughing so hard tears were rolling down their faces and they were clutching their stomachs..I could not stop!..So I decided maybe I could close it off!..I grabbed my butt and squeezed it..didn't work..made a squeeking noise..then they were on the ground rolling..my face was so red..if it was just me and hubby it would have been OK..but my Father in law..I knew I would never live that down..and I didn't..they told everyone about it for years..
And the first cake I made for hubby..I had to mix it by hand and use an ancient gas stove..well it turned out as hard as a rock..so I put it in the pantry till I could get to the trash..
Well I had forgot about it and his dad came to visit a few days later..hubby had found the cake and pulled it out..it had green mokd all over it!..He showed it to his dad and said"Want some cake dad?"..I wanted to kill him..never lived that one down either..men can be so cruel!
The Snoozy..
My most embarrassing injury happened when I was in the first grade (1986 or something). The class was doing the usual walk around the building after recess (hmm, like a cool-down after a first-grade workout I wonder). Some boys, with their nasty first-grade boy cooties, were walking behind me and started harassing me. One of them ran around the corner without the teacher looking, and when I came around, he tripped me and I landed square on my nose! All of the top layer of skin on the outer ridge of my nose was scraped off, and I had to wear this big bandage on my nose for a couple of weeks. It really worked out better for me, because I was being fussed over all that time, and they weren't!!
laters
kaykay_mp
Once after Saturday field service I wound up at a casual friends house. Jimmy was in the process of rebuilding a late forties flat bed Ford. He had gotten far enough along to take it for a test run so he offered to take me home. I put my book bag in the floor board and for some reason was holding my NWT. When we got in Jimmy warned me to shut the door hard since those old trucks had a double door latch. Gave it a good bang and told him we were good to go. Sure you shut it good, he says? You bet I said. So off we went.
First intersection we came to Jimmy made a hard left. When he did I bumped the door. Open it came and out I went. Rolled head over heels along side the truck a good 50 or 60 feet. When he stopped I stopped upright. It drew a crowd, some people thought I'd been run over by a crazy teen. Funny thing was I still had that bible in my hand. It was unscathed. My colths were filthy and somewhere along the way my clip on tie came off (never found it ). Jimmy laughed so hard he nearly threw up. He said I looked like a beach ball rolling down the street.
Another time when I was about 13 or so went to a friends house. We went into the back yard. He had a dog. That dog hated me. I had gone through the gate first and the dog attacked me. Got a hold of me right in the crouch and proceded to drag me around the yard. Randy managed to pull the dog off, when he did, at the top of my lings I ran screaming down the street to my house and locked myself in the bathroom. This too drew a crowd. Randy's mother came down and wanted to examine me. The damm dog manged to take a nick out of my, how did they say it on NYPD, oh yeah, johnson.
I blubbered like a two year old with Randy's mother standing outside the bath room door saying over and over: I need to take a look at you. My grandfather was came in and examined me. When he told the crowd crammed into the living room what happened all I could hear was oh my, how terrible, goodness, Randy's mother was the loudest. I could have hung myself from the shower rod. Geez, some of the shit that happened to me it's a wonder I wasen't cripple before I was twenty. By the way Randy's mother was a looker. The dog bite would have been the least of my problems. Being 13 and all.
I burnt my dick leaning on a hot piece of metal at work
