by fullof??? 53 Replies latest members private
Welcome fullof??? !
I am very sorry for your loss and the suffering it is causing you. These practices of disfellowshipping and shunning by the JW's with respect to their own loved ones is horrible. I hope your sister will quickly see the error in her treatment of you.
In the meantime, use this forum to share your thoughts and feelings. Receive in return encouragement, support, and well informed suggestions.
Love/Peace/Respect
fullof, firstly, i am so sorry to read of your dilema. i am the father of jw83 who posted you earlier.
11 months ago our daughter dad herself, she had been inactive for about 3 years, loving shepherds visits= 0. they were not interested. but as soon as she put a letter in we were told to dissasociate with her her husband, and our g.daughter. shamefully my wife and i did as we thought we were doing gods will,being brainwashed for 22 years.we all were torn apart,i had not experienced grief on this scale ever in my life. our daughter did not give up on us as we did on her for a while,we looked for loopholes in all the publications,and came up empty.the reason was it is not scriptural,when you analyze the scriptures in their proper context. my point is,"dont give up on your sister", tell her you love her, it will probably break her heart, and hopefully she like my wife and i, will see this unchristian,criminal practice for what it is, a MAN MADE RULE to exercise power over the cult members.
welcome to the site,keep your chin up,hoping things get better for you. mr alw
ps. sorry i got date wrong, jw83 our daughter dis'd 3 years ago not 11 mths.still clearing my brain out.sorry.
also rec. reading steven hassan :releasing the bonds,it will give you a clearer understanding of how your sister is being manipulated, and how you can handle it. mr alw
Hi fullof! Welcome! Sorry for the pain you're suffering at JW hands at the moment. I used to, when shunning started for us a few years ago, feel very much the same as you and just as distressed. In the last few weeks I have thrown of the grieving over this shunning practice and come to my senses.
What the hell are we all doing giving in to this crap that come from the lips of the Unfaithful and Indiscreet Slaves!
I, you and we all know its all rubbish, the WTBTS beliefs, that is. Why do we just roll over and die for them?
I have made contract with cousins and relatives, all JWs, and elders, and elders wives and have been kind, thoughtful and nice to them. They have been either too astonished or to well mannered to push me away in any way!
Perhaps, you should tell your sister that you will be continuing to treat her as a Christian should despite what she is willing to do to you and you will not stop treating her with love and consideration. You will forgive her now, in advance any evil she is willing to do to you in the name of the WTBTS and continue treating her and her family with all the love and kindness they deserve..
GET THIS RIGHT - These shunning rules are neither Christian or REAL rules. They are man made control freakery and YOU do not have to give in to either the pain, suffering or humiliation they are intended to cause.
YOU MUST rise above this NOW.
I don't know if my cousins are going to get a grip of themselves and try to ignore me when I next make contact, but I shall NOT be giving in to WTBTS crap!
I URGE you to be strong and do the same. Treat your relatives with love and kindness and hopefully in time they will see sense.
LOVE and faith in love can move mountains and may move your sisiter's heart.
Give it a go!
Good luck and best wishes
Gill
Hello fullof???.
This is how low they have to sink. Your stories an all to common one of Elder bullies. One thing in your post that did catch my eye was
she informed me that the elders had a meeting with her and told her that I'm way too involved in their lives and that they have to treat me as a disfellowshipped person
not she had decided or she wanted but she was told. It seems to me that they may be controlling what she does but not how she thinks. A small opening but an opening non the less.
Like others have said there is no logic used by the WT. It is bullying and while the matter has to be dealt with sensitively and politely, they are weak men who use fear in others to control. I hope you find some way to break through.
There is no logic or other valid explanation other than mind control and ruling by guilt.
Try to rise above it, everyone here will help where they can, i am sure.
G
Hi ((((fullof???))))
Your story is heartbreaking: a sadly perfect illustration of the utter nonsense of stupid rules applied by stupid people -- and yet an unescapable consequence of the heartless WT machinery. I'd bet few JWs could read it without a sense of shame.
You now have to cope with nonsense; sooner or later everybody has. The power of your love might make sense of it someday.
Hang in there.
I just dont understand this, and btw, Im really sorry. Im being shunned now (not tooo bad) because Im df'd. But in the past 15 years, (just fell away) I was not shunned by anyone! Just a few years ago, I attended my brothers wedding and reception. I talked with everyone, not just family. I even sang at his wedding. Unfortunatly I think it all has to do with the congregation you attend! Its so sad! And all this time, I lived a completely worldly life. Holidays, smoking.......... you name it. So why should your situation be any different? I have a cousin who is in the same situation. He went to a different congregation than I did, but he's not being shunned either. It just makes no sense! Keep your chin up, maybe she will come around.
That is such a brilliant story JW83 - I've read your posts before and your introduction of your two loving kind parents on here!
Fullof???, welcome to the board and I am very sorry to hear of your situation. As you have seen it is all too common of a problem, and as the WTBS continues to weaken they will try to tighten their grip on what members they have left. It is good you are questioning and trying to get out, it is a shame that pain is associated with that, but as with the healing process that is often the case, it hurts before it gets better. Hang in there.
