Could some-one please explain American football to me!

by Zep 62 Replies latest social physical

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  ezekiel3

  I like to see once in a while Rugby and somehow american football because it looks very virile

  FBF: love the accent baby!

  This is an American speaking:

  Football (named why?) has nothing to do with real football where people actually kick a ball throughout the game. In fact, anyone is caught touching the ball with their foot is penalized, except for the kicker who plays an occasional cameo.

  Notoriously popular amoung gay-bashing straight men, the heros of the sport are all named after parts of the ass: quarterback, tight end, fast back, and wide receiver. The leader of the team will stare directly at the testicles of a man in front of him and scream for the ball. If the players get excited they will spank each other.

  American "football" is a lot like American exercise: spend 1 minute benchpressing a hernia and then look in the mirror for 10, repeat.

  Football is perfect for the typical short-attention span American, who will watch a play, stand up and scream, and then sit down and stuff face with hydrogenated fats. By the way, another form of American exercise.

  Sponsers love the way the game is structured around commercials, and have actually made aluminum beer cans play the game as well.

  Meanwhile the rest of the world ignors this sport and unites for a real "World" event involving feet and a ball, which Americans call soccer.
• 

  whyamihere

  I'm a tutu wearing Frenchman...hmmm????

  Well you said it not me...and if thats your pleasure I would love to see you dance.

  Football is a fun game to watch and I happen to like it and thats fine with me.

  Brooke
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  Valis

  cricket..one of the most boring games on the planet to watch..

  baseball almost as much, but fun sometimes to go to stadium and watch..However the texas Rangers suck it like Beckham so I don't really watch. Oh and playing without gloves is all good and fine as ling as someone isn't hurtling the hard ball 90mph+ at you...

  rugby..great game, very athletic game..but played on grass exclusively so the kind of pads required to play on astroturf covering concrete are not required. I like watching on BBC and other sports channels when I run accross it.

  soccer probably the most physically demanding game of all the games mentionedthat lasts too long or field too big IMO. The only time I watch is during the Olympic games and I will watch whatever team is playing. I switch it to the mexican channel where the anouncer is off the hook w/his GOOOOOOAAAAALL GOAAAAALLL GOOOOOAAALLLLL and the hot chicks on the commercials.

  football, I only watch the Cowboys most of the time. Very complicated game with a lot more than the players trying to outwit the other team...plus a lot of technology, strategy, and teamwork go into winning the games. Now most of the people who play all of the above games, except cricket IMO, have to be very athletic, but not necessarily big to do well. However in football you are talking huge guys, like one of the Dallas Cowboy guys bench pressed the equivalent of a VW bug, as an example. Very quick, very powerful huge guys running at you with back breaking velocity. Combine that with playing on some grass and some turf stadiums it makes for a very volatile game. But hey, we have a couple kickers on each team, and a couple tossers as well, so you Brits should feel right at home.

  You guys forgot to pick on basketball, but then again you have no comparable game. Basketball has roots uniquely in the Americas' both pre-colimbian and US histories, besides that you are all too short.

  The one thing I can say about all of the athletes that play these games make obnoxious amounts of money for doing something they love....One wished they major orgs would dump serious money they pay players into charity. Say for instance attach charity bonuses to a player's fave org or something, or just make part of his contract pay go to a specific org...That way when some sod gets paid $250 million for a couple years it would somehow seem justified.

  Oh yeah, we could talk about tailgate parties while we're at it...

  Just my 2 cents.

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  The one thing I can say about all of the athletes that play these games make obnoxious amounts of money for doing something they love....

  Here's a different way to look at those high salaries:

  For one thing, actors and actresses get paid millions for movies and thousands and millions for TV shows. They get paid that because we are willing to pay to be entertained.

  Now on to athelites. Let's use baseball as an example. A good baseball player can hit a fastball going 100 or more miles per hour. A good pitcher can pitch one at 100 or more miles per hour. I don't know about you, but I've hit a baseball with a bat and caught one with a glove. Those things hurt like hell with just a kid pitching one fairly slowly. Do you think Kelsey Grammer can hit a baseball going that fast or pitch one or catch a ball hit by a batter when the ball was going 100 mph? But look at what Kelsey Grammer made per episode on Frazier in 2001:

  Kelsey Grammer from Frasier HOLLYWOOD, June 22, 2001 "Frasier" deal makes Grammer TV's highest paid actor By Erika Gimenes, Hollywood.com Staff ............................................Kelsey Grammer, who plays the character of Frasier on the NBC sitcom of the same name, is now the highest-salaried actor in TV history, Daily Variety reports. The actor has agreed to stay with the Paramount-produced show for the 2002 and 2003 seasons for $1.6 million per episode. Grammer and Paramount refused to discuss further details because the actor wants to keep his salary details secret. Paramount also is finalizing a new long-term deal for Frasier costar David Hyde Pierce, who plays Frasier's brother Niles. Grammer will surpass such actors as Jerry Seinfeld, Tim Allen and Mad About You stars Paul Reiser and Helen Hunt, who earned salaries of more than $1 million in the final seasons of their series. I say let athelites make big money. We all wish we were that skilled and could make that kind of money. If actors can make over a million dollars per TV episode, I'll not knock a pitcher for getting a several million dollar contract. I love baseball. It's my very favorite. I'm liking football more as I watch it with Andy and learn more about it.
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  ColdRedRain

  Rugby=A sport for meatheads that have IQ's that are too low to understand a football playbook.
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  funkyderek

  Rugby=A sport for meatheads that have IQ's that are too low to understand a football playbook.

  Hehe. Just because you fill your colleges with "football" players, that doesn't mean they're intelligent.
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  Valis

  really FD...do the math..Uni of Texas @ Austin..over 50,000 students...maybe several hundred football players..

  Even so, learning plays, formations, watching game film to learn strategies, etc is a lot more complicated than just getting out and scrumming on a field....

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer
• 

  funkyderek

  Even so, learning plays, formations, watching game film to learn strategies, etc is a lot more complicated than just getting out and scrumming on a field....

  I suppose it's the difference between remembering where you've been told to stand and making split-second decisions under immense pressure.
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  LittleToe

  With respect, methinks our pansy-cousins don't apopear to know much about the intricacies of Rugby...
  

  It's a bit more involved than just lobbing a ball up the field and hoping someone will catch it
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  ozziepost

  yeah, you get to do things in the scrums!