by Terry 61 Replies latest jw friends

  • daystar


    Well, I'm glad you are pleased by the extra weight and stuff...for us girls that's not generally a bonus. LOL

    For a man, though, it can be just the opposite. When a boy grows up skinny, he often gets picked on by the bigger guys.

  • misanthropic
    I know I'm not attractive to women anymore. Why can't I accept that?

    Wow Terry being that I'm a woman, I have to say that's most untrue. Especially your new avatar

  • Seeker4

    I see what you see in my avatar, sometimes naked. I'm in my mid-50s, and not unhappy with what I see. I've got 10 pounds I want to drop this summer, but things are going OK with that. I actually found that women have come on to me lots more since I hit my 40s and 50s than they ever did when I was younger. But that presents its own problems! I think the confidence that comes with age is a plus factor there. Not quite as tight as I once was, but working on that as well. Our neighbors were out in their swim suits the other day. He's in his 30s and a bike racer, she's in her mid 20s. Made me feel fine about how Lori and I look!
    It's a constant process, and to age well, you'd better figure on some serious exercise. On questionaires, MODERATE exercise is considered AN HOUR of vigorous exercise EVERY day! I was shocked when I was told that.
    I had a stress test physical a short while ago, and I charted with the physiology of a 32 year old, so that was nice. BMI is at the high end of normal for me, and the reason I want to go down another 10 pounds.
    It seems, as many of the posts here indicate, the thing we hate most about aging is the struggle with getting fat - a problem made doubly hard by living in the most obese country in the world. The metabolism slows down, and the weight is harder to keep off.
    But take heart, it's not an impossible struggle. There is an inspiring website about a guy named Bob Delmonteque, who decided at 50 to get into the best shape of his life. Today, in his 80s, he looks better than he did at 19. Check it out at www.bobdelmonteque.com. Also, google Dr. John Turner or his pictures at Growing Old is Not For Sissies.
    I figure if you're going to live, you might as well do it as well and as fit as you can be. One advantage of kids leaving home, etc, is it can give you the time needed to take better care of yourself physically.
    Ah, the ravages of age!

  • parakeet

    I get discouraged at the middle-aged view in the mirror, but then I think of how I was at 25--better looking, sure, but a dimwit JW who didn't know which way was up. Now in my 50s, I can claim at least a little discernment, a little wisdom, a little peace of mind, and most of my adult life spent the way I wanted it spent, not the way some old men in Brooklyn say I should have lived. I wouldn't trade that for any amount of youth and good-looks.

  • Calliope

    i wanna see a picture of terry!!!!!

    sometimes i'm photogenic, sometimes not.
    sometimes i'm "mirror-genic", sometimes not.

    strangely, there are times i am surprised by what greets me in my reflection.
    like i didn't expect so much grey (even though i know it's there)... and yet i still get "carded".
    are my lips really that pouty?
    so many freckles.

  • under_believer

    I've never considered myself overly attractive, so I have no illusions to slowly deconstruct as I age. The things that have attracted members of the opposite sex have always been internal. That's always in flux, too--I am not the same person that I was ten or even five years ago. But my wife and I have changed together; any time I look at her and think "she's not the person I married," another voice says "well, you're not the same person she married, either."
    However I am not comfortable with my own mortality, not at all. Sometimes I really comprehend the oblivion staring at me, and it fills me with dread. That was the point that the Witness training used to kick in, and thoughts of either the New System or the Resurrection would comfort me. No longer--now I just have the dread.

  • Fleur

    S4...I don't know if you think this is a compliment (it's meant to be) but the other day my husband and I were reading one of your posts and suddenly I said to him, "Doesn't he look a little like curt schilling?" (who is a god to my husband LOL) and he said, "Yeah, he does!" A leaner, handsomer sort of curt schilling I'd say. That is a great picture of you. I hope I haven't insulted you LOL.

    when I used to look in the mirror when I was younger, I saw a fat girl no matter how thin I got. that led to eating disorder, horrible self image. Now, other than to see that I don't have food in my teeth or hair sticking straight up, I don't really see much in the mirror. My husband has given me the happiest view of myself that I've ever had, in his eyes I'm pretty no matter how horrible I know I look. He's told me that I'm beautiful when in a hospital hooked up to ivs and pumped full of all kinds of god awful things that swell you up like a balloon.

    Now, when I look in the mirror I just see me. Never quite been what I'd hoped, but could've been worse. I guess at my age I'm realizing that I just have to live in the body I've got, and I'm glad to be alive. most days, anyway...


  • Quentin

    edit, because I'm a dumb.... I avoid mirrors......actually I haven' changed much in apperance...getting older...more gray in the hair and beard...weight has stayed the same over the last twent-five years or so...not much to look at really..

  • serendipity

    I see a powerful, beautiful woman, a bit tired of life's adversities, but a survivor nonetheless.

    To everyone else, I'm a barely middle-aged plump, tall blond, who's attractive, but not a standout.

  • poppers

    What is seen in the mirror will inevitably change, for that is the nature of this world we find ourselves in. But more importantly, notice what is noticing the changes. Has that ever changed? Will it? Can't you sense something deeper, something beyond the physical that is more real, more vital than the physical body or the mind?

    What I really am is no different now than when I was 21 or 2 or 1 day old, and now I find myself at 55. Yet I know/feel/sense directly that "I" have never ever changed at all and "I" never will. My hair has fallen out and I've put on a few pounds, but "I" am the same as always.

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