Is Virginity All It's Crack'd Up To Be? (page 8)

ApagaLaLuz

So why give it up in the first place?

Well I was in a long term relationship with someone I really thought I loved. We were together for quite a while. I was terribly attracted to him physically. I moved out on my own, had started a career. For me it was like the last thing before finally becoming and adult. That's what it felt like anyway. I dont regret it at all. I had been engaged before that too. It just felt right to me Billy, and fortunately, or unfortunately, depending how you want t look at things, that's how I live my life. I make no appologies about it. Of course I envy people who have been married for many many years, and have ONLY been with their mate. But that's not my situation.

Billygoat

I think that's more must a matter of your opinion, Billygoat. There are plenty of people who have had sex in a relationship before they were married and everything turned out just fine. There have been plenty of virgins who got married and their relationship turned into shit.

I'm sure this is true. But was anything I said, touted as fact? Of course it's my opinion. Don't make it sound like I'm a black and white thinker.

Does your husband share your faith? That may, in part, explain his being okay with not having sex before marriage.

We actually met at our church. But you DO need to know that people who attend the same church, don't always share the same faith. Most of Christianity is not cookie-cutter Christians, like JWs tout they are. Just because I attend a Baptist church does not mean I accept all their beliefs. Ask almost any Christian out there and they'll say the same thing. It's impossible, it's not realistic. Also, the two other gentlemen I date were also from the same faith and they were the ones I never heard back from. Thus exclamating my point.

Chevy,

I don't make apologies for my past either. I did the best I could with what I had at the time. Some choices ended up terrible, others not. It's all about learning from those choices. I'm just stating that is what was best for my husband and I. He was respectful of the decision, because he is gorgeous enough to have any girl he wanted. He's had them throw themselves at him. I didn't. I too wanted the WHOLE package. Which for both of us, didn't mean just great sex and a trophy spouse. We wanted more. Which we feel we have.

ApagaLaLuz

We actually met at our church.

lol... hey Billy, I heard all the hot looking nice guys were at church. I think you've just confirmed it for me. I think I need to go back to church now :)

<--------- is of to go try on new sunday hats :)

frenchbabyface

... Everything is in the head of those ho does and those who judge (true or not about what they did or what they know) ... If the society change the views will change along ... They'll be maybe a day where nobody will care !

They're is a south americain indian community who live's really in community style. They sleep whith who they want, when they want (nobody's crying) and they raised the children all together (the most important, in fact) ... I don't think they care about virginity (guess why ?)

FlyingHighNow

Deciding to wait until you are married to have sex is one thing. Placing more value on a person who is a virgin than one who is not a virgin is quite another story.

For people who think they cannot be with someone who has had various partners: it's all in your mind. It's probably more about your own insecurities than your lover's sex history.

Some people fear being compared to other lovers in bed; so they think must have a virgin spouse on wedding day. But the thing is, if you're inept in bed it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out you're inept in bed. Even a virgin is going to realize eventually that you're inept when it comes to sex.

Diseases? There are tests for diseases you know.

Someone who is so insecure, that they insist a mate have no previous lovers, might just bring other types of relationship insecurities along with them.

I'd rather be with someone who is secure with himself whether he is a virgin or he isn't. He also need be secure with me.

Flyin'

A

Abaddon

Crazy

My point is that you can be a Virgin and still know what to do. Its all about knowledge.

Yeah, and I can say I know about parachuting as I've read about it and seen it done. Doesn't mean I'm GOOD at it. I think a lot of guys like the idea of a virgin as a virgin hasn't got anything to compare their first intercourse with... well, except masturbation, and most women's first experience of sex is less satisfying than masturbation...

And doing it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over.............

... means you get quite good at it? I don't see any connection between morals and a high number of sex partrners. It's quite possible to have screwed a hundred people and never to have lied orcheated on one, just as it's possible to have five sexual partners and to have lied to and cheated every single one.

As for theories advanced about sex without romance means sex without effort. Yeah, well, a guy like that will only get laid once by each women. AND WORD GETS AROUND. There's a guy in Exeter I know who is famous for being hung like a donkey AND for being an inept, clueless lover (at least amongst a circle of about a hundred people I know).

Personally speaking I've had a couple of very satisfactory sex-for-fun relationships with no pretense of romance on either side but plenty of sexual chemistry. But as with most things in life, you can't take away more than you bring, can you? Lazy lovers (don't get) suck.

I also think that some women still approach sex like they are a different species as distinct from a different gender.

Most women I have known have been as sexual as most guys I have known. DIFFERENT, yes, but in extent? No difference. It's just more socially acceptable to be a "stud" than a "slut" (don't the words tell us a lot about society?), even though they do the same thing. This means women with a healthy interest in and attitude toward sex tend to keep quiet about it, as they just get unfairly judged if they have an active and liberated sex life.

These are the women who tend to be the best in bed, by the way.

FlyingHighNow

This means women with a healthy interest in and attitude toward sex tend to keep quiet about it, as they just get unfairly judged if they have an active and liberated sex life.

Women are not just vaginas. They are thoughts and hopes and dreams and ideas and wit, hobbies, talents and so on, just like men are. Look at the people they are and not like they are walking, talking vaginas. Abaddon, I mean the men on this thread who think women who have had more than one partner as unacceptable: I don't mean you. I see that you have a good view of women as people and not big vaginas that can also walk and talk.

About your friend hung like a donkey who is a bad lover: So many women I have talked to agree about one thing: guys so blessed tend to think that's all they need to be awesome lovers. For guys so blessed: think again, dudes, you need to learn the same things other men do. Edited to add: you don't get blessed with a shortcut just because you got "blessed with size."

Flyin'

Bulldog

Billy, although I don't share your view on virginity, I love your fiestyness and fire! You go girl!

Everyone has to decide what's right for them, and whatever they decide, they have to live with it, so I say, do what you know is right for you.

Chevy, you are so awesome, I just love you!

Logansrun, you have a rare clarity of vision, and cut through all the crap to get at the real and honest core.( I saw that movie recently, and it was so funny cause of how outdated it is now I couldn't believe how silly it seemed. The first time I watched it it seemed so cool and modern)

Flyin high, you nail some great points!

Is Virginity All It's Crack'd Up To Be?

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