Proof of adultery to get scriptural freedom

by scrubmaster 77 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Tashawaa
    Tashawaa

    Scrubs - WELCOME!!!!

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    a family member of mine stalked their XJW X spouse and took their new JW "friend " and another JW with them to catch the X . They took pics of the car parked at the X's place. Got them out of the marriage. Of course they could just as easly been sititng in the local jail for stalking. Of course the preson who did this could have just as easily submitted a letter to the BOE and then remarried. But they choose the hard way, "to be sure".

  • julien
    julien

    Here's a question: If two dubs get a non-scriptural divorce, can they still have sex with each other?

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Answer: No - not until they get remarried. It's classed as fornication (sex outside of wedlock).

    What's right in the sight of man is more important than the sight of God.
    Pretty crazy, huh?
    It speaks tomes, though.

  • blondie
    blondie

    No, they can't, julien.

    w82 9/1 31 Questions from Readers ***


    If a faithful Christian wife has been divorced by her husband, though neither of them is guilty of adultery, would it be Scripturally proper for her to share the marital bed with him when he visits the family?

    God?s Word clearly indicates that sex relations are proper between a husband and a wife, not between unmarried persons. Hence, a divorced couple should not have sex relations with each other, for that would amount to fornication, but not freeing them for remarriage.

    Christians, understandably, are concerned primarily about God?s views and directions. His Word specifically advises: "Let marriage be honorable among all, and the marriage bed be without defilement, for God will judge fornicators and adulterers." (Hebrews 13:4) Let us consider what bearing that has on the situation raised in the question.

    In many parts of the earth it is common for a man and a woman to engage in sexual relations without being married. Some claim that this is both morally fitting and acceptable to God as long as the two are in "love" or have made a commitment to each other. That, however, is not the Christian view. Appreciating that "God will judge fornicators and adulterers," Christians want to avoid both adultery and fornication.

    When a man and a woman get married they establish before all that they are united as husband and wife. In the sight of the law, society and God, they have a right to share in the privileges of marriage, including marital relations. The Scriptures, in fact, urge mates not to withhold from each other the sexual due: "The husband should satisfy his wife sexually. In the same way, the wife should satisfy her husband?s sexual needs."?1 Corinthians 7:3, Simple English Bible.

    What, though, if a couple gets a mere separation, which is legally possible in some lands? Since they are still husband and wife legally and Scripturally, they must not share in marital relations with anyone else, for to do so would be adultery that would ?defile their marital bed.? But a separated couple have the option of making up again and of living together as the married couple that they are, after legally canceling their separation.?1 Corinthians 7:10, 11.

    Consider next the situation of when one mate, for example the husband, takes matters farther than a separation and gets a divorce. A faithful Christian wife who later learned that (before or after divorcing her) he had been morally unfaithful could remarry, considering her former marriage ended both legally and in the eyes of Jehovah God. On the other hand, if there was a legal divorce but no adultery, the divorce would not of itself end the marriage in God?s view, for the Bible shows that immorality by one?s mate is the only valid basis for a divorce.?Matthew 19:6, 9.

    That is the situation with the case in question, for it is definitely stated that no immorality has occurred. The husband left his wife and got an unscriptural divorce. As a consequence of that divorce they are no longer man and wife in the full sense, for he terminated the marriage legally. So what if he visited his family and wanted to satisfy his or her sexual needs? For them to have sex relations would, legally and in the view of the community, be essentially the same as two unmarried persons having sexual relations; it would be tantamount to fornication.

    In that situation no third party is involved, as would be needed to give Scriptural substance to the legal divorce; so in God?s sight neither the man nor the woman would be free to marry other individuals. (1 Corinthians 6:16-18) Yet their having sex relations with each other certainly would be in disregard of God?s advice; to a degree they would be defiling the marriage bed since their legal marriage ended with the divorce. This conduct would bring reproach on them and on the Christian congregation of which the wife was a part. So, for her to remain in the congregation, she should avoid sex relations unless the marriage is made legal again. She should hold to the Scriptural and morally upright stand that sex relations should be limited only to legal marriage mates. She thus would add to the dignity that the Bible shows marriage deserves.

  • julien
    julien

    So they can't remarry because they are still married in god's eyes.. but they also can't have sex even though still being married in god's eyes? Do rank and file JWs not see how illogical this is?

  • shadow
    shadow

    Isn't there a way to just claim she confessed to you and be free in the eyes of the elders?

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    I remember back when I went to the hall, that in order to claim adultery one must have two witnesses. Even then, in a tough hall, some guy going over as explained and witnessed by several people likely would have been enough.

    In my situation, my ex moved far away, and proclaimed her "freedom." She claimed she was going to be allowed to re-marry in the hall in good standing. I called and talked to her elders, and told them she did not have her "freedom" and they said being that I am not going to the meetings, they were simply going to believe her.

    Ultimately, I believe it is up to each body of elders to decide what they want to do.

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    A tough situation, you want to re marry, you want to remain in the truth congregation ; you are sure that your ex has given you grounds , but cannot prove it to the elders satisfaction

    How about a signed letter to the elders that they can place on file. That would state that you are confident of the scriptual as well as legal grounds that have freed you to remarry. You are willing to take full responsibility for your actions and will answer to God for your action. On your own conscience, you are sure that your new marriage will be blessed by God and honourable before men , etc ...

    I do not see that they can insist on knowing all the reasons for your being so sure, but should be able to leave it to your own responsibility.

    See how that goes down. If you have a new partner lined up, congratulations and I hope it works out better than the last time

    if they do not accept that, then for goodness sake do not lose her. A loving woman is worth more than the approval of all the elders in the world. And start to think - , would the real f & d slave act this way if it were truly acting for Jesus Christ??

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    yes BB is right, u can write a letter to the BOE and tell them u feel before jehovah u are free. Then it is generally felt u carry the wrath of jehovah if it is not true-He will judge u if it is not true. So then u can remary as u wish. Many people do this, and my family member could have done it jtoo, but they are very OCD.

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