The Elders are Coming Help!

by LaurenM 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Like I was saying one time before, boundary changes and/or moving to a different part of town or wherever can definitely ''spoil'' one's intended ''fade''.

    I know I read somewhere that the elders HAVE TO know where each and every rank and file member is. Moving, well the local elders will just send your cards over to the new congregation. Boundary changes, same thing your publisher cards,records are automatically sent over.

    If the local gestapo elders group don't see you at the meetings, expect phone calls, drop in visits, etc. The more paranoid they become. Beware.

    This is what can impede one's fade, big time.

  • Simon Templar
    Simon Templar
    This is some kind of "search and destroy" thing that they have going on at the moment. They know if they are persistent, and they meet with you, you have agreed, become a "known" publisher/member with some level of contact by them and their control. If you don't want that, and are trying to fade, don't meet with them. Just call and postpone. Don't reschedule, if that's what you want. Don't let them know you or have a condition where they can just come to your house because you are a "member".
  • Vidiot

    Maybe they're suspicious that you might be an "apostate", are scared you might "infect" the local JWs, and want a pretext to watch you and see if any red flags go up.

    "The Redcoats are coming! The Redcoats are coming!"

  • blondie
    Actually, I'm surprised they just don't "drop by unannounced" which they did to us. Did not let them in, talked very briefly on the porch that they should call first and make an appointment. Then go back inside and quietly shut the door.
  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Dropping in unannounced, yes periodically. I remember the doorbell ringing on the midweek meeting night. I peeked through the peek hole, sure enough the congregation P.O.(at that time) and service overseer. They rang the bell twice because lights were on in the house and T.V. on.

    They must have been really hard to try to get us off guard!!!

    Like dropping-in unannounced on a midweek meeting night that must have been obviously switched!!

    Sheeeeesh, the nerve!!! Unimaginable!! And rude, above all else.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath
    if you do meet with these self important cult-cops----tell them your really struggling to make ends meet--ask them repeatedly to help you--a small loan--just a few hundred to tied you over.
  • Bob Loblaw
    Bob Loblaw
    Offer them coffee or tea and slip a high powered laxative in the drink. They should be out of there in no time.
  • rebel8

    Oh boundaries, just say no...blah, blah, blah.

    You guys are no fun. You're suggesting she take the easy and sane way out of it!

    Invite them over for tea. If they do not immediately say yes, text them once per hour, following up by email and voicemails, to ensure they got your first message.

    When they come, act batshit insane.

    Make the weirdest smelling tea you can find. Add cumin so it smells like dirty feet. Serve some really weird /smelly snack with it, like peanut butter and onion sandwiches on ladyfingers.

    Start by saying you are so excited because you can start attending meetings if they help you with 2 problems--you have been praying to Jehovah for help and then the elders called. Pause and let them feel self-satisfied in this victory.

    Talk incessantly about Satan causing you extreme diarrhea so you can't attend the meetings, and ask if the brothers can loan you some money for colon surgery.

    If you're female, then talk about horrible menstrual flow issues and be sure to share the graphic details of this as well. You know this Eve's curse and you need their spiritual advice on how to decrease your womanly suffering from Jehovah.

    Speak without pausing so they can't get a word in edgewise.

    When they start trying to leave, try to close the sale by asking when you can expect to hear back from them about the $ for surgery and advice on your period. If they don't commit, say you will follow up with a text in 1 hour to remind them.

    Let out a long, maniacal cackle as they leave, savoring the last time you will ever see or hear from them in your entire life.

  • mana11

    Moving creates a ? mark against you.

    If your letter of Introduction is holding some content then the question wil be to

    1/ why did he move?.

    You better have a good reason that is spiritual.

    Tell them the CO at your old congregation indicated their congregation need help and was weak, but you cannot discuss that more as you were told in confidence. If they want to know more talk to their CO.

    So you thought you would move to do what you can.

  • jookbeard
    great idea from Stan, perhaps up the request to a couple of thousand, car needs a big service, electric and gas bill is high, you wont hear much more from them.

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