by pale.emperor 25 Replies latest members private
It is quite possible to ditch the J W world and then not be happy in the outside world. The two are different and it is not always easy to adjust. Also , supposing he made up with his wife? No doubt he missed family life.
If he was prepared to lie his a$$ off to a reinstatement committee he could be a permanent PIMO, blag his way among the dubs , do an hour a month on a trolley .... and bob's your uncle......
Wow...my guess is the motivation is purely social...nothing to do with theology or belief system....
This. A million times this.
So many JWs would have to be there for the 'social' aspect. They secretly don't believe the nonsense, but its the only life they've ever known.
It's like Brooks in Shawshank. He doesn't want out. He can't cope. He can't handle freedom because he's never had it. He's institutionalized.
This guy is Brooks Hatlen.
Once I knew for sure that it was all a lie, I tried to help my wife out. I have no kids. I couldn't hang around hoping against hope that I could use an insider position to help her out. I had to go for my own issues and sanity. If I had unbaptized kids, I would have gotten DF'ed and been sure to let them start living "the real life."
Point- I am sure I could never go back. Even for pretend reasons.
It's no different to anyone else - everyone choses to believe or not, and they are not there because the beliefs correspond with facts or are even consistent.
People can be JWs and be as involved and zealous as they want to be ... or not.
He couldn't bear the loneliness and who can blame him?
He basically did it for his wife.
She got him to do her bidding, blackmailed him essentially.
But....her time is running out because now she has competition!!
As Wing Commander said, once the baby grows up, love will not allow him to put his little one through the torture he is going through right now, institutionalized or not.
Imagine not only having to go back to all those meetings and assemblies but being pestered about field service hours and having to join the ministry school. Ugg...I give it a year at best until he starts the slow fade again, only this time he'll keep his mouth shut.
PALE EMPEROR:
I think that people that go back and fake it are never happy.
I also think that in a religion that has a shortage of men - he’d be welcomed back with open arms no matter what he did.
UNDER NO ILLUSION:
I love it:..‘Flexible Forgiveness Program’ the way you describe it: depends on who you are, etc.😉... Very aptly put in a hypocritical religion!
Just maybe he is a good faker. I believe that there are literally thousands of "good fakers" in the wt organization. PIMO is another term used to describe "good fakers".
If there is a new baby in the picture then I understand him completely!
just saying!
For me, I woke up about 8 years ago but when all of my doubts came spilling out, my elder husband was devastated. I couldn’t see my life without him and upsetting him and my kids’ world so I recommitted to it. I re-indoctrinated myself. I pushed down all the doubts and questions I had. Everything came back of course. I knew that it would. I no longer believe and I’m still physically in but completely mentally out. I keep hanging on and hoping something clicks with my husband. Maybe this guy came back hoping he could help his wife out. Or maybe he deluded himself into thinking it’s the truth again. It’s not sustainable - I know that much.
Like punkofnice says “time will tell”.
not an easy thing to do wether he’s there truly in honesty or just faking it. Either way will be a difficult road to follow as there’s a child involved.
also his background will play a key part too... if he had a happy childhood as a jws then maybe he will commit or if he had a nice time as a normal child too, he’ll see that he needs to change his path to help his child to have a better childhood than himself.
it’s also true that we can’t shut our hearts to the truth... whichever that means to us.
Time will make him wiser whichever direction.
good luck to him.
