My families shunning has gone to a whole new level

by pale.emperor 52 Replies latest jw experiences

  • biblexaminer

    It sounds like "Mom" is suffering from munchausen by proximity to witness.

    There's no cure, unfortunately.

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    It's like the news and all the hype that was going on during the election....I did a news fast figuring if I didn't watch didn't exist. Guess worked ! It wasn't that I was hiding was more a case of not putting my emotional well being in harms way.

    Your mother has made it clear what she's about. If I were you I'd take a fast from your family and stop putting yourself in harms way. By doing so, her shunning doesn't exist.

  • Rainbow_Troll

    Your post makes me appreciate how moderate my own mother is by comparison. She's still a fanatic relative to most mainstream Christians, but compared to your mum she's a paragon of tolerance and understanding.

  • steve2

    When a JW takes a more dramatic, extreme approach to shunning there's no coming back. Pride would stop her. It is sad and it is done. Any parent who tells others that you are dead is effectively your mother no more.

  • truthseekeriam

    There really is no easy way to get through the shunning, its unnatural when you really think of it. I'm sorry your having to deal with this in your life.

    Many of us have experience in this and have had different outcomes. My only advise would be is to protect your heart and the heart of your child.

    Just remember you have control over what you allow in your life. If what they are doing is hurting you, you need to stop and protect yourself. In my experience once I stopped letting them control my feelings and started moving on with my life they caught on and eventually came around, not to the point they use to be but enough that we can be at peace and love one another in a new way.

    I wish you well.

  • smiddy

    Its very hard for me to comprehend how a mother or father can disown their own child because of religious differences or for that matter children disowning their own parents for the same reasons.

    Any religion that has this policy and condones this type of behaviour from its members should be named and shamed at every opportunity.

    Its nothing short of a disgusting policy and practice to be associated with any religion.

    My heart goes out to you pale emperor for having to go through this cruelty.

  • flipper

    PALE EMPEROR- I feel for you as well. Your friends here on this board and my friends here on this board are right- it's time to not let these JW relatives hurt us anymore. Just being in their presence can be toxic to our existence. Like 3rdgen, my dear JW mom died in early December and since her funeral I've heard nothing- notta- zilch from any of my older JW siblings or even my adult JW daughters to see how I'm doing. I've called some of them to see how they are holding up- but I get nothing in return. Silence and shunning.

    It's like JW's only put on a good outward " appearance " when someone dies- then after that we are pretty non-existent to them in the aftermath after " necessary family business " . Or " dead " to them in their eyes. Who of us needs THAT kind of treatment ? Nobody deserves that kind of treatment. I agree with others here- dealing with the hateful JW family you have is damaging to you, limit or just avoid them. I'm having to do that with my JW family as well , it's just too exhausting being played by them as it puts you on an emotional yo-yo. One day the yo-yo gets slammed into the wall and we break into pieces. I understand that you are tired of it, me too- I'm totally exhausted when I'm around any of my JW relatives - one reason I'm rarely in their presence- for my own sanity. Please know we are always here to offer our friendship, hang in there and take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • ssn587

    My advice totally ignore her tell others she's in a mental facility. Strike back, I damn sure would.

  • mrquik

    I have one daughter still in. I haven't seen her or my grandchildren in 6 years. I have two other daughters. One left the cult & the other was never in. We celebrate holidays, go on vacations, visit those grandkids. But we never talk about the oldest; there's nothing left to be said. Oddly, the oldest & my middle daughter still meet socially. Still, I don't care to know anything about her life; I have enough things to agonize over. They say time heals all wounds & to some extent, this is true. I think about her rarely & when I do it's with the same degree of loss that I carry with the passing of my parents. So, keep moving forward. Looking back is self defeating. As always; live well... enjoy life...

  • tiki

    Ironic isn't it that these same people love to toot their horn with the "by this all will know...that you have love among yourselves" but the love stays only in the what good is that. I think the hateful treatment so many endure due to this selfish religion is total evidence that true Christian values completely elude them. Let them go...toxicity in your life can only damage you. Not worth it.

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