Hello, this is my first post, I would like to introduce myself and say thank you to every one on this forum, you have been a lifeline to me these last few years.
I had been a jw for 30 years when I walked away a few years ago disgusted by the treatment victims of child abuse, domestic abuse and rape receive from the wtbts.
At first I thought it was a local problem, elders personal opinions, the way they handled the situations, imperfect men etc., until I checked out jehovahs witnesses and child abuse/domestic abuse online. That's when I realized they had the same modus operandi worldwide. That led me here, tbuo this forum, and then to Crisis of Conscience, JW Facts, Watchtower Documents, JW Survey, old watchtower literature and cd¨s, reading a couple of Steve Hassans books, and more recently Exiting the JW Cult.
The feelings of shock, betrayal, anger at the wtbts, angry with myself for being so gullible, depression, reflection, loneliness, have taken their toll. The overwhelming feeling of guilt for introducing my family to the cult is probably the hardest part, they are all out now, but I can never give them back all those wasted years or take away all that they suffered. We are all moving on together, and making a new life, although I don't think I´ll ever really be able to forgive myself.
Once again, to each and every one of you beautiful, brave people, thank you.