Feeling Sad After Uncovering TTATT

by pale.emperor 42 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Billzfan23
    You're going through rebirth pangs - it is always painful to realise cherished and comforting beliefs are just human fancies

    For me it was more personal than than just losing faith in a belief system. I adored my grandfather, wanted nothing more than to have him back with me in a paradise. I was also an identical twin, with a brother that died at 2 weeks old in Kabul Afghanistan (we were born there..I lived, he didn't). I always wondered what it would have been like growing up with him - we were exact copies of each other. I used to daydream about him coming back as an infant, and my wife and I raising him like I did my own son (who is 18 now and like me, out of the borg).

    Real life set in, and that sure was sobering, to say the least....

  • Watchtower-Free

    Many like myself had physical pain when learning TTATT.



    Its real and common

  • Darkknight757

    It's going to take time so just hang in there. You'll be angry, sad, depressed, anxious, and furious sometimes all at the same time. The pain does lessen some as time goes on.

    Just remember: They are a criminal organization that is purposely taking people away from the Christian means of salvation in Jesus Christ. Everything they teach about him goes contrary to proper belief in Him. His death on the cross and not a torture stake, his ressurection in the flesh, he being one with The Father. JW's, according to the Christian means of salvation are bankrupt. They will lose out on their hope in the end.

    Of course I think that religion is just a means to control people and it's all a bunch of horse shit.

  • DesirousOfChange

    It feels like someone has died. I feel sad. . . . Has anyone else felt this low after discovering TTATT?

    The trauma of discovering TTATT is indeed much like the loss of a close loved one. I found that I felt like my entire world had collapsed around me. Everything that I had been firmly taught to believe since infancy came into question. If the WTS/JWs were wrong on one of their fundamental teachings, then could they be wrong about some (or many) of the other doctrines. (YES!)

    For over 50 years of my life I had been being lied to and living my life and making life's critical decisions based on those lies. I too was extremely sad. . . . . until extreme anger overtook the sadness. I was angry at the wickedness there must be in the men to have continued to promote these falsehoods and cause damage in the lives of millions of persons for their own selfish reasons. They are even too proud to admit their error and apologize to those who have been harmed. "Wicked" may be too kind of a description for them.


    The greatest revenge is living a happy & successful life!

  • millie210

    This is the hardest part. It wont get any worse as far as feelings than it is for you right now.

    Its like learning the most valuable things are lies. Lots of underpinnings in your psyche falling away.

    There is life after this stage for sure. We are all in various ways, proof of that.

    How you proceed and how you frame this out is up to you, It is within your control.

    I can say that if you are still grieving give yourself time.

    A slow deliberate fade is working for me as far as not losing people I value in the Org.

    A couple are even making their own way out.

    My plan is to get as many family members out as I can and each Bible study that got baptized because of me is going to have a hand of help extended by me. If they want to accept it, I will help them.

    hugs Pale.

  • oldskool

    Make a list of things you've always wanted to do for yourself, and do them.

    What I wrote on this thread might be some help. I was in your exact same situation when I left.


    Based on what you've written its seems clear you are in the early phases of understanding what happened to you. It takes a while to go through it all. If you haven't caught up on Steven Hassan's material, now might be the time to do so.

    Base your approach to your wife not around doctrine, but around empathy. It's easy to trigger JWs in to fear, and then they act more irrational than usual. Empathize with her, be a good husband. It will work out but take your time. You're not in a battle, your in a process. It's easy to get worked up about the moment. I had good success thinking beyond the day to day.

  • DJS

    Everyone is different, so trying to evaluate one's responses to waking up to this cult vs. another's is not wise or fair. Having said that, my emotional responses were:

    Humor - laughing at myself for thinking I knew the answers for so long

    Humility - see above

    A sense of well being - Confirmation that there was a reason for the distress and anxiety I had felt for so long while in this nasty cult and trying to do what jesus would do (vomit)

    Anger - At myself mostly, and at the Dark Lords secondarily

    Elation, Joy, Satisfaction, Euphoria

    But no, never sadness.

  • Crazyguy

    It's not only sad depressing and also shocking, you'll probably develop PTSD too. It sucks but hopefully your young enough to get on with your life learn from it and enjoy yourself in the future living your life to the fullest. Hang in there they say it gets easier over time.

  • Giordano

    Pale....... I have a different prospective cause my wife and I left over 50 years ago! It took me three years to work it out that this wasn't the truth. No internet..... no C of C, no cult literature. Just a gut feeling it was BS.

    Talk about timing! Vietnam was raging and I stopped pioneering so I became Draft bait. My family decided I was a loser. My wife and I had one C average diploma between us. No real job skills. My JW friends and network disappeared.

    It took a while to rebuild our life........missed some of our friends to this day.......... but we have made better friends. All in all the best decision we ever made!

  • berrygerry

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