Feeling Sad After Uncovering TTATT

by pale.emperor 42 Replies latest jw experiences

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  LisaRose

  Welcome. I think most of us experienced something similar, it is a blow to find out everything you believed is a lie. It does get easier with time, although you are right that there is no acceptable path to leave, at least to those who still believe. Don't rush anything or feel you have to take a stand right away, give yourself the gift of time to get used to this. How you leave can have repercussions, so make sure it's on your terms, it's not dishonest to hide your true thoughts from those who would use them to hurt you. You have been deceived and lied to, so think of it as using their tactics to protect yourself.

  There is no need to rush to replace this religion with another belief system, people have struggled with these questions for centuries, you don't need to have the answers right away. As time goes on things will get easier and you will get some clarity on how to move forward. When I first left I wasn't sure if this religion was "the truth" or not, or even if I believed in God, I just knew I couldn't do it any more. I just didn't think about it for a while and focused on putting one foot in front of the other and eventually things came together.

  Good luck on your journey out of the darkness.

  Lisa🌹
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  Greybeard

  pale.emperor

  Its nice to hear you are feeling better today. You said, "If elders come to me im going to refuse a discussion "i dont talk about religion". They cant get me for that (i downloaded and read Shepherd The Flock Of God and know their rules)."

  Refusing a discussion with them is the smartest thing to do. If you say "I don't talk about religion" you have started the game and now it is their turn. I know what they will say to that and so do you. It is a game, the only way to beat them at it is avoid them and be as nice as possible about it. I know, I did it the hard way. If I were you and they came to me and I felt trapped. I would focus the game on them. Hey, nice to see you! How have you been? How is your family? Everything all right? How is sister so and so? Me? I'm doing great, I just can't keep up sometimes, you know how it is. Try not to give them a turn focusing on you. Thank them for being concerned about you and then stare them in the face and say, I am doing just fine. Hey, I got to go, nice seeing you! Always stare them in the eyes when you talk and do not look away. Make them look away, watch their eyes. Its a game you can win if you play it right. You be the one in control of the situation.
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  pale.emperor

  Refusing a discussion with them is the smartest thing to do. If you say "I don't talk about religion" you have started the game and now it is their turn. I know what they will say to that and so do you. It is a game, the only way to beat them at it is avoid them and be as nice as possible about it. I know, I did it the hard way. If I were you and they came to me and I felt trapped. I would focus the game on them. Hey, nice to see you! How have you been? How is your family? Everything all right? How is sister so and so? Me? I'm doing great, I just can't keep up sometimes, you know how it is. Try not to give them a turn focusing on you. Thank them for being concerned about you and then stare them in the face and say, I am doing just fine. Hey, I got to go, nice seeing you! Always stare them in the eyes when you talk and do not look away. Make them look away, watch their eyes. Its a game you can win if you play it right. You be the one in control of the situation.

  Thanks again.

  The unfortunate, and tricky thing is, my wife's dad is an elder. In my hall (and im sure every hall) there's social cliques. the "who's who" of witnesses. Her dad is very much in that clique of elders families all getting together doing things, going on holidays together etc. I cant escape contact with him all my life. I dont dislike him although we've had some major run in's with eachother since i've been married to my wife (see my very first post). But at the same time he doesn't see the woods for the tree's so to speak. He lives the perfect elders family life. He doesn't question, look into or debate WT doctrine... hell, he even asks ME questions about theology (im very well read in world religions).

  So if it comes to it, im gonna use 1914 as my exit card. I guarantee almost all witnesses cant explain it in laymans terms or even with the bible alone. My wife doesn't even understand it, she just rolls with it because it's too complicated to look into.

  I'll become "the brother who is stumbled and researching his beliefs" then never look back.

  Interesting update guys, only this morning i told my wife the real reason we don't do birthdays. Because Bro Rutherford banned them because he, personally, didn't like them. In the same breath he also banned singing in the meetings, handshakes (they were effeminate apparently) and tipping your hat to women (they shown subservience to women). She was surprised and laughed and said:

  HER: I wish we celebrated birthdays

  ME: OK, from now on we will

  And we will.