Message from Designer Stubble to the former JWR members

by Designer Stubble 123 Replies latest jw friends

  • Buck Rogers
    Buck Rogers

    Wait ... Fugue wasn't a mod? Wtf shows what I know I always thought he was because of the quality of his posts and breathing life into the forums I guess.

  • Simon
    Simon

    You often get people who contribute to the running of a site who aren't actually directly involved in it officially. There are many people like that here - they help a great deal both in contributing content but also setting a tone and I'm afraid to say "hey, be a mod!" because it might ruin a good thing.

  • TimeBandit
    TimeBandit

    Well, I was upset about this on a few different levels. However, I do not intend to be 'Vexatious" as Mickey said. I was just reacting to the shock of it all.

    I do regret saying what I did to DS. So my apologies to him. The things I said about Rifter, I still feel that way. He chose poorly.

    For those who spoke about our feelings as if we should just get over it (Tallulah, this is for you honey) that will happen shortly. But the F bombs and your angry post do not invalidate my feelings and reactions to what happened.

    I think that I posted some helpful and supportive things during my time at JWR. Maybe I was "vexatious" a time or three, but I was deeply hurt by being disowned by the parents, my brother dying, and dealing with related issues that took their toll. I'm over most of those issues now.

    Just a couple of days before the big cutoff, I had started posting there again and was thoughtful, and welcomed new ones, and offered my support and wanted to be of help. That is who I am deep down. That is who I intend to be here. I've already said what I needed to say out of shock and dismay. I think it was the 'get over it' attitude I saw in Tallulah's post that set me off again.We will 'get over it', in our own time.

    Meantime, we should be focusing on adjusting to the new forum, it's ins and outs, and trying to continue our journey here. Thanks again to Simon for all his (and other's) hard work.

    TB-

  • Pauljr
    Pauljr

    Yet another one arriving from JWR.

    First things first. Thank you Simon for providing an alternative to JWR and thank you all members for the warm welcomes I have read for ex-JWR members.

    As I am well into the realm of ex ex-jw land, I am not heart broken for the demise of JWR. I was still strongly present and, more in a supportive role for new ones and for anyone asking for help.

    My personal losses are comprised of friends and for those that I have a very high regard for in intellectual as well as leadership qualities. These losses are substantial. I hope you know who you are. I have read many and not all posts regarding the "way" JWR was shut down. Personally, I have been on vacation for over a week and when I checked in I got the sterile shut down, go see a psych message. While this is disappointing in and of itself, perhaps more disappointing are some of the rock throwing posts aimed at admin's and mod's and each other. I presume these behaviors are the stuff that Rifter finally opted out of so suddenly. To be clear, I will miss JWR very much and, I can now make even more friends and get to know a new site.

    Change is inevitable and necessary to grow and survive. It also hurts. JWR was very classy with the exception of the shut down. Most of the JWR members are very classy with some exceptions. This site will come to know of whom I speak.

    Thank you JWR for hosting a site with wonderful givers who gave me what I needed when I needed it the most. To me JWR was not about an internet forum. It was entirely about great people who care, have empathy and are comfortable in their own skin. I love many of you. I hope to develop similar friendships on this forum.

    I have created my own new gmail address for those who wish to contact me. I did this primarily for JWR friends and am happy to hear from anyone. The address is paul666jr@gmail.com.

    Warm Regards to past and future friends.

    Paul

  • TimeBandit
    TimeBandit

    I think Fugue would make a really good recovery site proprietor. I wish that could happen. I appreciate his willingness to try and buy the database. Could it be that Rifter had deleted it? Is that why he won't pass the baton? Could be.

    Doesn't matter now I suppose. Thank you Fugue.

    TB-

  • Stone Cold
    Stone Cold

    Thanks DS ,for making things clear to us and how it stands.Itmust have been difficult for you in the last week.You must have been quite emotional about it after 8years.I was only on it a few months and felt great sadness about it.I don't know if I will continue on here as I am coming to terms with things.Take care and thanks. SC.

  • Stone Cold
    Stone Cold

    Oops I posted on wrong place. I feckin knew I wouldn't get use to this

  • Stone Cold
    Stone Cold

    Maybe I didn't . Aw feck this

  • sweetgrass
    sweetgrass

    Meaning of 'recovery'

    noun [S or U] UK /rɪˈkʌv.ər.i/ US /rɪˈkʌv.ɚ.i/

    › the process of becoming well again after an illness or injury:

    Mira made a full recovery from the operation.

    We're sorry to hear you're ill, and wish you a speedy recovery.

    › the process of becoming successful or normal again after problems:

    At last the economy is showing signs of recovery.

    B2 the process of getting something back:

    The police arranged the recovery of the body from the river.

    Ok I am bored with this now. Offering a place to enable 'recovery' invites and instills a sense of hope and trust for many 'vulnerable' and 'traumatised' people.

    The ending of JWR betrayed peoples 'trust' and telling people that they can just go elsewhere is very insulting and dangerous and shows arrogance and ignorance. You cannot offer 'support' and help with 'recovery' and then say 'I am not qualified' go and find somewhere else. Many people don't frequent 'other' sites, why should they if one site meets their needs.

    The 'RECOVERY' part in JWR was misleading in itself and maybe people should have more often held up their hands and said 'you know, I can't help you with that but I can suggest you contact.....' and signpost them to other sites and organisations that could give specific support.

    Its about responsibility, a doctors hypocratic oath is to 'do no harm' JWR was not a doctor but offering a place for support and help for vulnerable people towards 'recovery'. I believe 'the do no harm' somewhat applies and the ending of JWR was very unprofessional and has done harm. End of.

  • jwundubbed
    jwundubbed

    If anyone were to start a forum with a focus on support and recovery, I would be interested in helping moderate. That is all I can offer but I have plenty of time and energy for something I feel passionate about. I would have eventually offered to mod or help out at JWR.

    For now, I think my feelings on the matter of the other group are getting closer and closer to closure. One positive point to a sudden and definite ending is that all you can do is learn to accept it. It takes time, but it can happen... sometimes in a shorter amount of time than with a longer shut down process.

    For now, I begin the process of getting to know JWD and figure out what I can offer here. I am very glad to see many of the posters from that other site as it is the community which I feel the greatest loss of. I really fell in love with that community. I'm sure, especially after seeing so much support from Simon and the members here, that I will shortly find that I fit in here just as well.

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