As most of you know I have been shunned by my family for 2 years because of a photo posted on facebook of me kissing another girl at a party. The matter was not dealt with fairly but it is over now and I am 100% certain that JDub org is a cult.
But I miss my family so much. I pretend to not think about them. I even say to myself I do not need them or love them anymore because they shunned me. But that is not true because I do love them. I was very close to my family and we had a good family before we converted to the JDub cult.
I am thinking, I am considering, going back just so I can be reinstated so I can have my family back. Once I am back then I will fade away, just so I can show my family how far I have come on my own. I would like to have children when I am finished with school and I can not imagine my grand kids asking why they can not see their own grandmother. I can not allow that to happen. So I am planning now to go back and get reinstated so my grand kids can know their grandparents.
Am I doing the right thing or is this the medication speaking?
Please help me. Nobody can understand me better than you guys here. I am so happy to be free of this cult yet so sad not to have a normal family life.