I'm PIMO, and this is how the PIMIs are talking:
Has anyone seen the news? Satan has decided to start giving us a hard time again. The only reason I even saw it was because it's in the news, so it's not like I went looking for it. All of those people are nothing but a bunch of apostates. I don't believe them for one minute. This isn't going to go the distance, Jehovah won't allow it. Most of those people were probably exaggerating. They were even trying to make us look worse than the Catholics. We'll just have to be patient and see what the Governing Body has to say about all of this.
The only reason I even saw it was because it's in the news, so it's not like I went looking for it.
If I ever get caught watching Stormy Daniels, this is the excuse I'm going to use.
I'll use that excuse for Mia Malkova too, even though she's never been in the news. That girl could make an atheist change his ways, because the shitter on that critter looks like it was handcrafted by God himself.