I lied to the elders

by atacrossroads 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • freddo

    Keep your heads down, the pair of you.

    Try to let the emotions subside a little. Be careful your own mother doesn't try and "set you up" with a second witness.


    In a month's time you might realise your mother has Df'd you personally anyway. But the silly woman might have panicked and run to the elders like the trained puppy we all were.

    She just might think. You told her some good stuff!

    Did I say "TAKE YOUR TIME?"

  • Driving Force
    Driving Force

    "catch me if you can game"

    I like that expression, get on with your life without the JWs. They have no authority over you, and play the "catch me if you can game", the more busy they are with such ridiculous things like chasing you and your husband, the less time they have to pester other people. I takes very little effort on your part, but a great deal on their part. Just refuse to talk to them point blank. What can they do, absolutely nothing, they cannot even DF you for saying nothing. If you are requested to go to a "Witch Trial" mention it on here, and you will get lots a differing advice to choose from, depending on what suits you. There are different methods of dealing with this.

    In my case, my wife turned me into the Elders, our marriage is now at an end. It is great for you that your husband sticks to you, buy him a beer from me.

    However it goes forward for you, I wish you every happiness for the future.

  • Landy
    Keep your heads down, the pair of you.
    Try to let the emotions subside a little. Be careful your own mother doesn't try and "set you up" with a second witness.


    Just get on with your life, try not to get involved in any discussions on the matter.

    Hopefully time will smooth over you family's perceived hurt and they will come round.

    But, if they don't that's up to them, try not to worry about the things you can't change.

    Good luck!

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath
    This whole sad story only serves to emphasise that jw's are just a sad silly cult. Put it all behind you..get on with enjoying a happy life without it. Hopefully your family will start to wake up eventually.
  • cognac
    what a selfish person I was
    She said she did not raise me to be stupid

    Cult or not, I'll never be able to wrap my brain around such hurtful statements especially coming from a person who gave birth to you... It's disgusting and completely vile. I'm so, so sorry you had to endure such abusive treatment...

  • jookbeard
    good for you , its good to lie to elders, most of them have no idea how to be shepherds of a so called flock, there is no holy spirit guiding wrong doers to repent, lead your life the way you want , dont return their calls and threaten legal action if the call at your house again, you are moving in the right direction in your life, its sad about your mum though
  • MarkofCane

    Hi atacrossroads

    We have all come to these cross roads and have had to make hard decisions, I admire your 'courage' in the face of so much hostility. Its so clear isn't it, that its a cult!

    I personally didn't want a confrontation with my aging mother or In laws, they are fanatical to say the least. Every sentence is marinaded with nuances of the 'Cult'. I never really noticed it, until I deprogrammed and took the blinders off, its like they cant express themselves without saying Jehovah, organization, truth or some other trigger word, its very annoying. I played out every scenario in my head and the outcome is just like you described. So I decided on a slow fade, I don't think there is a right or wrong solution just what work for you, in your situation.

    Regardless, It seams we lose, no matter what. The cruel words that there was "no point, you are going to die at Armageddon anyways" is really the crux of of the problem. They are so brain washed, they would rather give up their 'now' with you, there future grand kids and life's memories for a illogical future fantasy a utopia contrived by men. These very men that have built an empire on duplicity, their own literature convicts them.

    Take your time and say nothing to the Elders, "the only power they have is the power we give them". Strip them of that power and they shrink before your eyes. Welcome to the forum, read some of the 'waking up' experiences and post as much as you like, it therapeutic.


  • ttdtt
    The 2 witness rule comes to mind.
  • hoser
    Atacrossroads: sounds like something my mom would do or say. They are blinded by the cult and use it as an excuse to be abusive. Or they are just plain abusive. I'm not sure which it is.
  • Doubting Bro
    Doubting Bro
    I think you did the right thing. You are under no obligation to discuss anything with them. I likely wouldn't share your feelings with anybody else that could corroborate your mom's story though. It is sad that a mother would turn her own daughter in but likely she thinks she's "helping" you.

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