Were You AFRAID Of The Elders???

by minimus 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • nowisee
    nowisee

    the only elder i was ever afraid of was my father when he lost his temper. he was volatile.

    the others were my friends and i got along well with them for the most part - was good little by the book jw for years. well that changed.

  • minimus
    minimus

    I remember a brother in his 40's crying because he was upset that he had hurt ME, when he fornicated with a neighbor friend. At the judicial meeting he was sobbing because he felt that he "disappointed me". I was flabbergasted that this publisher that I wasn't particularly close to, felt so strongly about upsetting me, as one of his elders.

  • Jayson
    Jayson

    My wife used to be scared to death of the "elders" even years after leaving the wt. Now I feel so bad that when they came to the door I let her handle them alone. I didn't want to be accused of abusing her by not letting her "go back" if she wished to do so. (Which I never did but am still accused of) It was years before I had my first run in with an elder who tried to flex his might toward me. Here is this little 5'6 160lb guy (maybe 170lbs soaking wet) trying to get in my face with his little 18yr old son backing him up. I'm 6'8 and 270. Either these guys are very brave or very stupid. They are lucky that I know I could literaly kill them with my bare hands if I wished it. FYI the wife/mother elder appologized to me very quitely after the confrontation. Later my family came to me with a warning, " That my family[they] had better learn to control me." I guess the elders won because now my wife I will not let my JW family come over. They [elders] claim to only have "spiritual concerns" but that is not true. It is about contol and nothing else.

    Maybe that is one of the reasons I sometimes have trouble relating to some of you here. Many would give up a kidney to have a relationship with your family, any relations. I/we have choosen to not have any relations and would go to court to enforce it. They come after us not the other way around. They use "Hassan" tactics to try to wedge into our life not the other way around. They want it both ways, they want to shun but still be a part of our lives. They can't have it both ways.

    Of course every time they have been allowed in it is disasterous for us. 12 years of their abuse, it was enough.

  • minimus
    minimus

    Jayson, why don't you just kick their asses?

  • Jayson
    Jayson

    Minimus,

    I won without violence. My wifes family and the JW's defeated themselves. If for no other reason; why give the bastards the satisfaction?

    Jay

  • free will
    free will

    no, i just felt like they were the principal at school. you didn't want to get called in!

  • ikhandi
    ikhandi

    Hell no. At my judicial meeting, I simply refused to give them the answers to to the questions they were asking. Which kinda pissed them off. I didn't care at the time and I really don't care now. Its been awhile and I haven't heard from them. No phone calls or impromptu meetings. Could it be that they have forgotten me and said I am a lost cause? If they were to call to arrange to meet I would say I'm not interested or I'm all set.

  • minimus
    minimus

    ikhandi, they probably just disfellowshipped you, that's all.

  • ikhandi
    ikhandi

    minimus its been four years. They would have gotten rid of me if I answered those ludicrous ques or not!

  • Mystery
    Mystery

    My dad was an elder. Many people were afraid of him. We had a "status" (an elder and money, we weren't "rich", but had enough to do pretty much anything we wanted) in the congeration.

    Frankly, I was "afraid" of him, he was THE ELDER.

    I guess he was alway afraid I might, just might, disappoint him. (I guess in the long run he was right).

    I wonder if that is why he never told me that he loved me?

    Guess I will never know.

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