Daughter counselled on dating a wordly guy

by minimus 82 Replies latest jw friends

  • Gopher

    How happy can this letter-writer be? She bemoans the loss of many of her past friends, as if she has very few or none left. That's the way it is in the JW world though, your friends eventually move on one way or another.

    Then she says "she has heard this news" about your daughter. Then she accuses your daughter of "lying to her all this time". That can't be true, for she hadn't heard from your daughter in quite some time. Losing touch is not the same as actively "lying". But that's the judgmental JW mentality.

    Then she questions whether or not she should go on being your daughter's friend. That right there says that the friendship is conditional, and not really real.

    This letter-writer needs to concentrate on being encouraging within her own congregation, helping the elderly, etc. -- because it sounds like that's what she's going to spend the rest of her life doing while waiting for Armageddon. She certainly is not headed for a family life of any kind, from the sounds of it.

    As for your daughter's boyfriend, if he passes the "smell test" in your opinion, then your daughter probably has a good thing going.

  • Robdar

    Back in my day, we didn't have the internet for me to receive this sort of email. My best friend just went off and told the elders about my worldly boyfriend and then told her mother.

    When I called to speak to Carol to ask her why she betrayed my confidence, her mother got on the phone and started yelling about how her daughter did nothing wrong because Carol was concerned about me losing my standing with Jehovah and BEING DESTROYED AT ARMAGEDDON!!! Carol's mother also told me that there was a good possiblity that me and the worldly boy would divorce since he wasn't in the truth.

    We did divorce but not because he wasn't in the truth. The irony is that Carol married a proper JW and they got divorced too. He wound up being an abusive creep.

    This little know it all who wrote to your daughter thinks that her meddling is the right thing to do. Wont she be surprised when the irony comes home to roost? Marriage, whether in the truth or out of it, is a slippery slope.

    Your daughter dating a worldly guy is not a gaurantee of marriage unlike with the JWs who think that if you go on more than 3 dates together you should get married. If I were your daughter, I would tell this nosey sister to go piss up a rope. Which would be interesting to see. Much more amusing than this holier than thou letter she sent to your daughter.

    Jeesh, already.



  • blondie

    Well, minimus, what can I add? It is basically cut and paste of the doctrines and directives from the WTS. I don't see a single scripture in that letter unless I missed it. JWs kid themselves if they think they have friends. It is all conditional. "I'm your friend only if you do what I think the WTS is telling you to do."

    The JWs are a performance-based religion and this letter proves it.


  • manon

    Replies in the simplest of terms work best: Get a life/ stay out of mine.

  • minimus

    Wait til her "friend" finds out she's engaged.

  • rocketman

    I'm with all the posters who have commented so far.....Big Tex's FO sounds pretty good right about now.

    rocketman - of the I married a "wordly" girl and been married over 20 years class.

  • manon

    One thing is trying to save her from herself, another thing is jewelry and romance. This engagement business will certainly drive her over the edge. I hope she's happy and may she enjoy every moment.

  • DJ

    ultimately, they're the ones who have to make the decisions


    CONGRATULATIONS TO YOUR LITTLE GIRL!! I'd tell her self righteous annoying friend to read her own words. dj

  • Jayson


    Does your daughter know that you posted her letter?

    My wife went though all this when we were dating and it continued after we were married. They still pray that something bad happens to me or we divorce so that she will come crawling back. (At least as far as I know)

    It is a strange love hate relationship with those who find happiness in the real world.

    In their mind she just has not come back......yet.

    In the end we have no JW friends or family. And we are OK with that.

    All I can say is that I have watched my love grow so strong and I admire her very much. If you can support her do so with all your heart. When we got married my wife walked down the isle alone. Not one person from her family showed up for the wedding.

  • minimus

    My daughter posted her letter on this site. She discussed this letter with her girlfriends and they all think the letter writer is pretty pathetic. My daughter expressed that she no longer is going to attend congregation meetings. She's had it with the "friends".

Share this