I was around age 16 when mum was disfellowshiped,one day we were in a shop and a sister (we new well)not only ignored my mum but obviously snubbed me as well.I was trying to stay associated at that time,and i was very upset ,so mum marched up to her and said "I am dissfellowshipped-not my daughter.And I dont think your kind of attitude is very christian!" then the sister replied"well thats why your disfellowshipped ,your no christian" I didnt go to many more meetings after that even though Mum was still attending. She stopped going for afew years and is now attending on sundays.And she tells me that its different than it used to be as people do smile at her, and one old man talks to her and says he will save her seat for next week. so either the law is changing or people are deciding to use their freedom to thought and compassion etc.Doesnt motivate me to go back there though!
Where do they sit in your hall?
I used to sit with my family right in the middle. I would turn up early and make eye contact deliberatly and smile nicely. If some one came up to speak not knowing my situation I would talk back. They still reinstated me!
Jez: I had similar experience wile I was DFD. My wife was studing at the time and they snubed her too. Great example of John 13:35. So whats your situation now. Did you ever get dunked?
for hippikon -hello
God its hard to remember dates .I must have been 13ish asI was 1st yr high school.I was very sincere in beeing bapt .I may have been 17 when i left.Although never officially as I wasnt even missed at meetings!Mum actualy phoned the elders to say please my daughters need some help and encouragement ..but they have there own families s
o we never were acnowledged.
JI, per your story at the shop.
There was this sister in a KH I used to be. She had four kids. She was DF. Don't know the story. She'll get them nicely dressed and drag them to the hall; they'll all take the row before the last. Didn't know she was DF yet, but noticed she was ever so quiet and the kids behaved quite well too. So after the meeting one night, I walked up to the kids and started chatting with them - didn't talk to the sister yet; she had this stern look that said to steer clear... Was chatting with the kids and playing with them. Nice kids. Then a brother touched me, pulled me aside, then said "look, the mother is DF". I said so what?? Only playing with the kids. He said, well, y'know, it'll be like you're showing allegiance to the mother who is DF! Really, I thought he was nuts. And you see her husband isn't a JW. Imagine how hard it'll be on her. To get ignored and have same happen to the innocent children. And even Jehovah has most probably forgiven her.
Thanks for sharing that. How shameful!1 The whole df/shunning policy is nothing more than psychological,emotional abuse.Not to say humiliating........I feel for those who have gone thru that nonsense, regards,Tina
That poor lady,she was probably so scared that someone might talk to her.I wonder how old the kids were .I imagine the last thing a dsflshpd person wants is her kids to make a sound at tha meeting!She was brave to go at all.
Allegience!That is laughable...I believe that if JW"S want to be taken seriously,give some room for concience.If there is atrue religion a lot of importance is inpeoples hearts not in "I better not talk to her or an elder will council me".Then your inner private self has a bad concience becouse youve gone against your own feelings and beliefs.What would Jesus prefer acts for men or acts out of love!
Good point Jez. The rules are endles and no one wants to incure the disfavour of the elders. Im also peeved by the fact that a lot of the rules and procedures are secret and suject to change without notice.
Some are older men some are old women.
I swear I am not making this story up.
About 10 years ago, when I still was a semi-good Dub, there was a blind woman at our hall that was df’ed. She had four small children, with the oldest around 6 years old. One night, in the middle of winter, with about 3 inches of fresh snow on the ground, I was driving home after the meeting, and I saw this woman being led down the middle of the road by her oldest child, with the three younger ones in tow. It was about 1 mile from the hall, but at least 1 mile to the small town where the woman lived. This woman was not legally blind, she was completely blind. I stopped and gave her and her children a ride home.
I was shocked by what I had seen, and told my wife about it when I got home. I was even more shocked at the next meeting when I told the PO about what had happened and was told “Yes, the brothers are aware of the situation, and are dealing with it. We are not sure what to do since she is df’ed.”
This still hurts me to think about what I saw, and that I was once a part of such a heartless organization. I know others must have driven past this woman as they went home, but no one stopped. Why were we so willing to surrender our humanity to such a cult?
5GJW, who regrets many things, almost all of them JW related
Thanks for straighting me out.
Hang in there girl.
Thanks for straighting me out.
Hang in there girl.
FP>>Who me? I'm an old toughie! But don't ask me to be on Survivor! LOL