What I find bemusing is, if there are any disfellowshipped ones in your hall they have to sit at the back. Now without getting into the merits/rights/wrongs of whether this should be still acceptable, where do they sit in your hall?
You see I seem to remember that they would sit on the back row, come in quietly just after the song and prayer and leave at the end just as quick. There would be this unwritten rule that some may sit there. But what I have noticed in my hall and in neighbouring congregations is that they will sit along a row of chairs placed along the back wall, usually where an attendants sits. This sends messages to all those in the cong who are there, a very subtle message (I don’t think) that we have the spiritual unclean with us. Even if they have family they can’t seem to sit discreetly at the back.
Where did this stupid rule come in?
It just seems that if any did want any to return we seem to excel at making them jump through hoops, just so that they can show this humbly, repentant attitude.
Well at my hall, there was a d'fd person who would sit in the front. Nobody asked him to sit somewhere else. In another case, a d'fd bro, sat in the back room(2nd school where there was a speaker and windows).. It was by his choice. But after a while, he was asked by an elder to sit in the main part of the hall, which he did, but it was his choice to sit in the back row. There is now a d'fd young lady who still lives at home with her JW parents and a baby, and they all sit together. They have always sat about the 3rd or 4th row from the back, even before she was d'fd. So they sit in the same place now.
I guess each cong is different, bu I never was in a cong, where dfd ones were ordered around. And not allowed to stand for the songs???? Never heard nor seen that before!