Waiting's Never-ending Joke Thread (page 22)

Seven

I had to remove the cartoon I had posted. The owner of the site has his ass in a cramp about not linking...something about causing people's browsers to crash or some such horse crap. He can shove his cartoon up his keister.

waiting

Well, Seven,

That didn't sound very lady-like, now did it? PMS'ing? Blonde brain cells burn out? Get a sunburn under the ol' bikini line, did ya?

Lord, I luv this!!!!!!!!!! I'm old - so I can say pretty much what I want - just blame it on menopause or such crap. Senility is not that far of a reach, oh-my-gawd.

Ha! Fear me now, bitch!

old as dirt waiting

Btw, all the foregoing is because we haven't chatted in private for a while and this is how we talk in private, remember? Serves you right - or me - for not icq'ing. Miss ya!

I'm sure I would have enjoyed a morning giggle from your cartoon, however.

Seven

Waiting!!!!! I miss ya too lady! We must icq soon.

PMS'ing?

Like a mofo!! In fact several of my regular customers were discussing ancient African tribal customs(they couldn't provide me with a reference)where during a woman's time of the month she was barricaded inside a hut. Every few days they'd check on her to see if the she was still "on the rag"(their words, not mine). If she was, they'd proceed to beat the crap out of her with a club and throw her back in the hut. Jerks. I think they were using this fractured fairy tale as a hint for me to either take some time off or stay in the house.

Btw, the cartoon was a very funny Calvin and Hobbs. You'd have like it!

waiting

Hey Seven!

If she was, they'd proceed to beat the crap out of her with a club and throw her back in the hut. Jerks.

Lord, I can relate the feelings though - on both sides of the barracaded hut door. If you haven't read Englishman's joke on the JW Joke thread - go read it. Has to do with changing lightbulbs and pms. Taught me another off-color word.

My language has really flowered since coming on the web.

Btw, read your response to Grunt. How about starting a thread and let us in on the positive flow from you?

waiting

Caole

Self-confidence

Roamingfeline

Caole, lol, that's not self-confidence, that's FEMALE!

RCat

waiting

Hey Cat,

Naaaaaaaa, that's not female - that's feline.

Hey Caole!

Love the "confidence" picture. I have a cat like that - but she just deals with my 3 dachshunds - big difference.

You can just see the interest in the shepherd's faces. Good trained dogs. And the cat knows it. Cats! Damnable creatures of independence - have had many, cursed and loved 'em all.

The cat walks with confidence in a slightly mad world.

waiting

GinnyTosken

Jesus At The Bar

The bartender was washing his glasses, when an elderly Irishman came in. With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey. The Irishman looked down the bar and said, "Is that Jesus down there?" The bartender nodded, so the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey, too.

The next patron to come in was an ailing Italian with a hunched back, who moved very slowly. He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti. He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting at the end of the bar. The bartender nodded, so the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti, too.

The third patron to enter the bar was a redneck, who swaggered into the bar and hollered, "Barkeeper, set me up a cold one! Hey, is that God's Boy down there?" The barkeeper nodded, so the redneck told him to give Jesus a cold one, too.

As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Irishman felt the strength come back to his leg, so he got up and danced a jig out the door. Jesus touched the Italian and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Italian felt his back straighten, so he raised his hands above his head and did a flip out the door.

Jesus walked toward the redneck, but the redneck jumped back and exclaimed, "Don't you touch me, Jesus! I'm drawin' disability!"

reagan_oconnor

Ginny -- Great joke!

I am the master of my fate/I am the captain of my soul.

Waiting's Never-ending Joke Thread

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