The Poor JW Children

by larc 65 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  JAVA

  Lets add one more to your list, larc:

  10. Don't frighten children with crazy demon stories! Children need to feel secure at home and in their religious community. Goofy tales about demons in used stuff or in Smuft dolls only adds to their insecurities. The Society talks about the potential harm of Halloween and the like, but the so-called worldly kids usually know the difference between make believe and fun. Compare this to the harm of thinking real demons are lurking in Smuft dolls or used items picked up at garage sales.

  ---JAVA, counting time at the Coffee Shop

  Edited by - JAVA on 26 February 2001 8:17:25
• 

  DriveslikeJehu

  I would almost dare to say that at least 75% of witness teens have suicidal thoughts and tendencies.

  I suppose I'm fortunate that I'm in the other 25%.
  

  Do they offer activities for the youth (other than 5 boring meetings a week), do they encourage the youth to associate with one another? Thus sayeth the GB(parties, dancing, music all suspect) 'all that is required is more hours spent in 'field service'.

  Are you talking about the GB? Parents? The youths themselves? Most youths can come up with activities on their own that they'd like. My friends and I used to go to the movies at least once a week(nothing good is out now), and now we try to play pool at the mall.
  

  5. Don't tell them they have to get good grades through high school as a reflection of what Jehovah has given them and then tell them they can't go to college when they graduate from high school at the top of their class.

  
  They don't tell them that anymore. Been there, done that. I'm in college right now. As a matter of fact, I should be studying for a computer logic class instead of posting here.lol
  

  8. Don't tell an inquiring child not to ask questions and don't tell them not to read interesting books.

  I hope Chrichton, Clancy, and the like count as 'interesting books.' Or at least they are to me. They helped me finally get the gumption to try putting together a novel series of my own. The first(of three) book is done and being typed, and the second is in progress. Waitaminit, I'm not a child. I guess my point isn't valid.lol
• 

  trevor

  I second the comments by Java.

  As a child my mother claimed to be plagued by demons from time to time. I was warned to be on my guard as they would come into my room and try to harm me. My parents told me to pray to Jehovah and if I had been good he would help me. I could never be totally sure I had been good as I was repeatedly told that I would never be good enough.

  Naturally I laid in bed in fear, too frightened to get up and go to the bathroom which was all the way downstairs and as a result, would sometimes wet the bed. This made me a bad and filthy boy, which meant I could expect no help when the demons came to get me. To make up for this I was given a sturdy walking stick that I kept in the bed with me to fight off the demons. Later my parents decided the stick was demonised and threw it out along with the several other contaminated items.

  I spent many night laying awake asking Jehovah to forgive me for whatever I was supposed to have done wrong. Every shadow and noise could be a demon. Fortunately the demons never came so I must have been good enough for Jehovah to protect me after all. I was so grateful that I became a regular pioneer 6 weeks after I was 15. I was most concerned that other people could benefit from the same protection I had received.

  The next hurdle to overcome was making sure I pleased my protector, Jehovah, enough to persuade him not to kill me. The funny thing is that after I left the Witnesses, the demons lost interest in me. They probably know I will now to be killed off by Jehovah so they are busy terrorising other Witness children. I keep a baseball bat by the bed just in case they get a day off and call by for old times sake. Ah but is the bat demonised? Still the devil will call his boys off if I ask him, now we are in league with each other

  What other children had such an exciting childhood? Why on earth would I want to have been brought up differently and miss out on such an adventure? Of course Witnesses make the best parents - what is wrong with you all!

  Trevor
• 

  somebody

  larc, this is a wonderful thread. everybody here understands. other parents who have raised their children in the JWs, can understand too. What I think the positive aspect of it is, that children, when they grow up, can see that parents were only doing and saying what they were, because they in their hearts, were saving their children's very lives. I realize that my parents only followed WBTS teachings because they thought they would have to watch their children die at armageddon. like LDH pointed out in another post, many parents are good parents, wether they were JWs or not. It's because they LOVE their children. If your children are grown now, I'm sure they can see that.

  thank you for your thoughts.

  peace,
  somebody
• 

  LDH

  wow, you guys. This thread is deep....

  Trevor, sorry about those experiences. They were unnecessary!

  Java, that's a great point you made, friend.
• 

  unanswered

  somebody, i totally agree. i'm not mad at my parents for how they raised me, i just came to a point where i didn't believe all of it anymore. of all the people in the organization that i might be angry with, it isn't my parents. most of the friends i grew up with that are not in the "truth" any longer feel the same
• 

  mommy

  Larc,
  I love the post thanks I have so many comments on this topic I could go on for 4 pages! But then you would all be bored. One thing I can say is that I treat my children very differently. I am happy to say that I have had many people comment on how open and honest my kids are. They are little free thinkers and I try to encourage that. Sometimes I get stumped by them and I just love it!
  DLJ,
  I have told you on another thread you don't get the point. There were several people that commented before you on this subject, and several after you. Everyone agreeing and sharing personal experiences, some very painful. I for one wouldn't pop my head into a subject I had drastically different views or experiences and basically trample everyone feelings and say,"Heck you guys what are you talking about?LIFE IS GREAT! Because then you sound like a one man marching band for the....wait a second...Why are you here?
  wendy
• 

  waiting

  Hey Trevor,

  What other children had such an exciting childhood?

  The parents of the WTBTS have no special standing for being of low intelligence, uneducated, uncaring, mental problems, lack of love. There's lot of parents like that, out of millions who aren't like that. My parents topped your parents any day of the week.

  My parents had serious issues, to say the least. People in and out of the organization are cruel and/or mental and/or stupid.

  I think larc made a good point when he said about religions: the WTBTS is set up to make children have tougher lives just by virtue of being a jw. (paraphrasing). I think that true. But I also think that some persons gravitate towards the jw's - and are looking for mental & emotional stability because they don't have that within themselves. Sadly, some never achieve mental & emotional stability.

  Sounds like your parents didn't. I'm sorry.

  waiting
• 

  larc

  Waiting,

  I am sure that parents in all religions and all cultures vary widely as to their effectiveness. I was not referring to the individual cases of really bad parenting among the wintesses or elsewhere, or to the percent difference in bad parenting for them as compared to other groups. I was referring in my list to either organizational sanctions and/or congregation norms and values that have the adverse impact that have been described so frequently in this discussion forum. I know there are very good parents who have made exceptions to the strict parameters of the witness culture. When they did, e.g., promote college for their children, they were criticized. Resisting social pressure is not easy even when the official policy has changed, but the local norms have not. For a recent example of this, read Lurker's bio. under "hello, hello," and how he cried himself to sleep after being sanctioned for going to college. (I believe that you stated that you faced criticism yourself when your son went to college) There are also parents at the other extreme who use the Societies sanctions to grind their children down with an autocratic implementation of the rules. In between are the average parents who love their children, but impliment the Societies really bad rules. I do believe, however, that if the Society took steps to make the relatively easy eight changes in their methods of their treatment of children and adolesents that I desscribed, that the average parenting techniques among the Witnesses would improve as well, and the average JW child would grow up to be a lot healtier.
• 

  waiting

  larc,

  I was referring in my list to either organizational sanctions and/or congregation norms and values that have the adverse impact that have been described so frequently in this discussion forum. -larc

  I think larc made a good point when he said about religions: the WTBTS is set up to make children have tougher lives just by virtue of being a jw. (paraphrasing). -waiting

  I think we're in agreement. It would be nice if the WTBTS changed it's views, but I won't hold my breath. It would then be nice if the jw's who belong to the WTBTS would go around the WTBTS and raise their children as you suggest. Perhaps the next generation.

  waiting

  Edited by - waiting on 26 February 2001 22:42:47