I'm meeting with my congregation Elders Today HELP PLEASE

by LennaB 103 Replies latest watchtower bible

• 

  Coded Logic

  AS OF NOW I have no hope for the future, angry at the way I was treted by some of the people in my cong (even though their were some great people), questioning id I can even trust the bible?

  Lenna, there are plenty of things worth believing in. But the Bible is not among them. There are plenty of worthwhile persuits in your life. But religious indoctrination is not one them. I don't know if a God does or doesn't exists. But if a God does exist then they will understand you're desire to ask questions and to reject ideas that do not make sense. They would want you to use your brain and to follow your heart.

  Be good to your family - because you love your family. Be good to your friends - because you love your friends. Help those in need - because they are in need. Be a moral person for the sake of the positive effects it has on the world around you. And make well informed decisions so that your good intentions don't go astray.

  What makes you happy? What makes you feel good? What types of people do you like to be around?

  I know that when I was a witness I was spiritually starved. There is a deep seeded cynicism in the JW teachings: Humans can't make the world perfect so we shouldn't even try. Humans don't live forever so whatever we do doesn't matter.

  These are the most vile of all their teachings. Because what we do DOES MATTER! It affects the people around us. And if we try we can be a positive force if we want to. We can bring happiness, and joy, and love into this world. We can lean to accept people for who they are and encourage others to do the same. There is not a single person on this planet who can't make the world just a little bit better.

  Human dignity is worth believing in. And human well being is a worthwhile pursuit.
• 

  cha ching

  Though you may have a lot of concerns about "what's next?" , this experience can be a positive one that you can learn from and make you stronger and wiser as life goes on.

  All humans grow and learn every day....

  Today was your day...

  Grow....
• 

  Fernando

  Hugs for you and your husband, LennaB.

  "Please rember this is fairly new to me and I was taught this from a young age... I just turned twenty this year only a few months ago.."

  Time is on your side.

  Take a deep breath.

  Have your favourite drink.

  Slow down.

  Calm down.

  Be grateful (for waking up so early in life).

  It is a process - not an event.

  You do not have to figure it all out today.

  It should be an exciting journey of discovery.

  Yes, we've all been lied to, but are now free.

  It can be a bit of a shock to discover that our "trusted leaders" are simply blind fools.

  We are partly to blame.

  Remember?

  (Psalm 146:3) . . .Do not put YOUR trust in nobles, Nor in the son of earthling man, to whom no salvation belongs.

  Instead of listening, obeying and being blessed, what did we do?

  We allowed a small group of men to claim God had appointed them over us (read clergy class or clericalism).

  We allowed them to insert themselves as self-appointed middlemen (read clergy class or clericalism).

  By refusing to deal direct, we rejected God in favour of a VISIBLE Golden Calf (read clergy class or clericalism).

  One day your future self will smile and laugh at much of the fuss and confusion your present self is dealing with.

  It passes.

  Clarity and peace takes its place.

  Now back to the beginning...

  Take a deep breath...

  Have your favourite drink...

  Slow down...

  Calm down...

  Greetings Fernando
• 

  JWdaughter

  Lenna, you will be fine. The people who love you will chalk up your zealousness to your age and youth. A LOT is forgivable and many will be happy to indulge your little folly.

  If you can go to a trusted non JW family member and tell them whats going on, your doubts, etc, they will likely support you and get the word out so that no one bugs you about it. (depending on your family,some get nosy, some just sweep under rugs of love). People that love you will be RELIEVED that you are over "that phase'. don't be offended, they will call it your JW phase forthe rest of your life and that is probably the extent to which it will ruin you. OTOH, you will be OUT and you will not be dragging in your husband or future children.They are going to love you and not give a crack about this.Your kids will bless you as they go to scouts, play sports and sing in the school choir.

  You have all of life before you. Soon this will just be a bad choice that you quickly righted. If Brittney Spears can come back, and Robert Downey Jr. can, then your little escapade with the JWs is so rightable.

  Right on, girl!
• 

  LennaB

  Thenks everyone once again for the love. I went to my Disfellowshipped cousin who I thought would have studied independently.. But I was a fool to do that... My husband is relieved to say the least. He always thought that everyone seemed fake anyway. I've burned almost all my bridges with my "worldly" friends so their is a lot of rebuilding to do. What about all the answered prayers and experiences in the yearbook/watchtower? Are they all fake?
• 

  Skinnedsheep

  All fake or embellished.
• 

  Fernando

  We often try to speak for God on which prayers he does/doesn't, can/can't answer, and why.

  Maybe a little presumptuous?

  At any rate, I believe like Ray Franz that God rises far above any particular religious organisation or ideology, and is not guided even by their mere existence.
• 

  passwordprotected

  Hi Lenna.

  All hope is far from lost. The future hasn't happened yet. Don't fret over it. Be glad that you've learned what you've learned now rather than decades later, as many here did. Start rebuilding those bridges, you'll find the friendships from "Worldly" people are much easier to repair than you might think. Thanks for sharing your story, you're among kindred spirits here.
• 

  disposable hero of hypocrisy

  Hi lenna, regarding prayers, there's a reason they tell us that praying is useless unless you WORK ALONGSIDE THEM.

  If for example, I prayed for a job, then sat on my arse for the next three weeks and got a job anyway, yes, prayer might be more believable. But we're told to work alongside our prayers, get OFF our arses and look for a job, give jehovah something to bless. So we go out and make the effort and we get the job. And if we don't get a job then we think "well it clearly wasn't to be, it wasn't jehovah's will '. This is called confirmation bias, we're fitting the facts to what we want to believe.

  I think it was the July 2013 WT that has an example of a CO not having enough money to put fuel in for a return journey somewhere, he went anyway, and lo and behold, he received a donation of exactly enough to get home! The thing is, at thistime, the tsunami in the Philippines had just happened. There were 27 jw's cowering INSIDE A KINGDOM HALL no doubt praying their socks off, but they all perished. I doubt very much that a god would step in to provide fuel money but ignore the congregated pleas of his people in HIS place of worship at a genuine calamitous time.

  Besides, if he EVER steps in even for trivial things like providing fuel money (or helping a brother find a pen in the street so he could write a return visit down - true story) then surely that's exactly what satan accused him of with Job? Putting a fence around his followers. How can he intervene, full stop?

  When I think back to answered prayers, I realise that I worked alongside them, I accomplished what I wanted. There were many other prayers that didn't get answered because life's a bitch.
• 

  Coded Logic

  What about all the answered prayers and experiences in the yearbook/watchtower?

  In logic there is a very specific kind of confirmation bias known as Post hoc ergo propter hoc. Imagine an old man who prays to win the lottery and then the next day he wins. The old man might conclude that, due to his one in a hundred-million odds of wining, God must have answered his prayer. However, what he isn't aware of is that 90% of the people who bought lottery tickets ALSO prayed to win. He is suffering from availability error because he is not taking into account how many "unanswered prayers" there were for him to get his one "answered prayer."

  Likewise, in many of the yearbook accounts they are only looking at all the good things that happened to the witnesses without addressing all the bad things that happened to the witnesses. This is confirmation bias. We all know that good things happen to people. We also know that bad things happen to people. I could take a random group of 7million people and then write a book about only the absolute best experiances of few dozen of those individuals. Out of 7million people, I would be able to find some pretty good/extraordinary stories. Where the logical flaw comes in - is acting as though that cherry picked sample reprents the norm amongst the entire group. Even worse, would be to draw the conclusion that since a few people had some amazing experiances, the whole group must be Gods chosen people.

  The Yearbook is cherry picked data. It would be like driving through Beverly Hills and then concluding that every single American in the USA is a multi-millionare. Most Americans don't live in Beverly Hills. And most JWs don't have Yearbook experiances.

  This is done at the Kingdom Hall level too. The elders say, "You should FT pioneer. Look at Joann, she prayed to Jehovah ernestly and she was able to do it. You can do it too!"

  What the elders don't notice is that Joann is the exception at the hall. Her parents paid off her mortgage and her husband works a good job and they can afford to not have her work. And the elders completely ignore that most JWs are living pay check to pay check swimming up to their eyeballs in debt because they never got a college education and they can't afford to work part time. Most the JWs who "should be pioneering" drive cars with 200k miles on them because they cann't afford a new car. All the while Joann the FT pioneer is riding around in a brand new $50,000 SUV that is paid off.

  Its amazing how Jehovah only blesses those who come from upper middle class homes so that they can pioneer. And that he doesn't bless those who are poor and trodden upon. Joanns sacrafice to FT pioneer is not being able to add a third family vehichal after they purchase a boat this year. Where as the poor JWs sacrafice to aux pioneer two or three times a year is that they can't afford to get that new set of tires their vehichal desperately needs. But everyone acts like Joann has done some amazing feat while the R&F witnesses are just a bunch of slackers who may or may not make it through armageddon because they are so spiritually weak.