Accusing Ex-JWs of Behaving Like JWs Should be Taboo

by cofty 447 Replies latest members private

• 

  FlyingHighNow

  I know it annoys Simon no end to be accused of acting like a JW...when someone is booted from this site.

  Which is understandable because all internet forums boot people, so it's not a strictly a cultist behavior.

  Throwing the point around lightly, can make it sound cliche', like a pat answer to a person that you don't agree with.

  The problem is though, that sometimes people really haven't let go of an entrenched JW behavior. They bring it with them to the forum and refuse to acknowledge the behavior and continue to hurt themselves, others and the forum with the cultist behavior. One of the worst problems I see is anyone who is consistently pushy with trying to persuade others to his/her point of view on God or no god, and becomes childishly insulting when someone doesn't agree.

  Should we allow ourselves to be so thin skinned that we can't see that someone is trying to help us and the forum, by encouraging us to let go of residual JW behaviors, proselytizing as one example?

  If you hear enough people telling you that a behavior you exhibit is a JW behavior, you should at least think on it. They could be right.

  Hopefully we are all here to help each other escape the clutches of the WTBTS cult and to remove their tentacles from our brains.

  Food for thought: when we leave the JWs, sometimes we adopt something else to a cultish degree.

  From dictionary . com from it's definition of cultism/cultist

  5.	intense interest in and devotion to a person, idea, or activity: the cult of yoga
• 

  cofty

  consistently pushy with trying to persuade others to his/her point of view on God or no god,

  This is a religious discussion forum - it's where people can be expected to debate religion with passion.

  This is another example of using "JW mindset" as a convenient label to condemn their pet peeve.
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Passionate discussions are just that, discussions. We are talking about behaviors, though, that are left over from the cult which most of us came from. Cofty, there are times I find myself with residual JW behaviors. It's not the end of the world if someone points it out to me. It's not always a pat insult when someone sees that we are behaving like JWs and they point it out. Take each time someone points out JW behavior, separately. Sometimes people are right. I know that this can be thrown out there insincerely, or used as a pat come-back, but often there is merit to someone pointing it out.
• 

  cofty

  I disagree. Everybody defines "JW behaviour" to suit their personal peeve. It was totally predictable that you would focus on trying to persuade others regarding belief. It was just as predictable that VG and Talesin would focus on feminist issues - actually VG made it about dozens of things.

  Its a lazy way of dismissing people you disagree with.

  Deal with the specific behaviour without the pejorative label.
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Here is the rest of the quote you noted, Cofty:

  One of the worst problems I see is anyone who is consistently pushy with trying to persuade others to his/her point of view on God or no god, and becomes childishly insulting when someone doesn't agree.

  I've seen this happen both ways, from both sides.
• 

  cofty

  The internet is full of childish people who insult others who disagree with them. Have a read at almost any forum or YouTube comments.

  It has nothing to do with being an ex-JW
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Its a lazy way of dismissing people you disagree with.

  I might agree with you, but in my case, I don't say this to everyone I don't agree with. I say it only to people that are displaying the behavoir.

  I'd like to point out that Tal is an atheist. She agrees with you.
• 

  losingit

  Abbasgreta-- YES! Thank you! Im agnostic, and the way Xians are attacked on this site is a huge turn off. I used to read the pages long debates regarding creation vs atheism. Ive quickly learned to avoid these threads completely. The level of vitriol on this site sucks, and Im sorry cofty-- but if I see that you're an active participant in a thread I.immediately go to.another website. There is no such thing on this site as 'live and let live'. It's arrogance and attacks everywhere if theists and atheists decide they wsnt to engage. Whatever. id like to learn more from the atheists on this site, but the degree of hatred towards theists is too much. When I have time I'll go look on my own foriinformation. Peace out . - losingit
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  The internet is full of childish people who insult others who disagree with them. Have a read at almost any forum or YouTube comments.

  I am specifically talking about JWN and discussions between mostly evangelistic Christians and atheists, in my comment. I used that as one example. It's the biggest example I have come across on our forum. It can also happen with other subjects.
• 

  nonjwspouse

  Cofty, maybe sometimmes the label is used to describe or explain a behavior, not in an attacking way. ( Though yes I have seen it used as an attack as well, which is comletey wrong) When I see it used to "label" a behavior in a non attack way, it is because of a connection to the "mind training" the "faithful" Jws continuously exhibit and demand. That behavior is usually also defined.

  For some, like born-ins, I imagine some of the thought training would be extremely difficult to completely change in a person.

  My outside opinon of course.