Welcome iwasblind from down under , I enjoyed your first post and yes it is hard to first open up on a forum like this when you first have doubts and see that some things just don`t add up . Then you delve a little bit deeper and find more discrepancies , till you finally come to know TTATT .
Many people stay in the religion simply because they can not face up to the fact they have been so stupid to believe it in the first place
In other words they cant admit they have been wrong all those years .
I was an idiot for 33 years , you say you have been in for 40 years , others on here have been in a lot longer than either of us and have woken up.
So it is never to late....Your lucky to have your wife on the same page as you are some poor folk here don`t have that blessing .
We look forward to hearing more from you
Take care
smiddy